How do you deal with the humiliation of labor?

[Anonymous]

The Salvation Army Band could've paraded through the room while I pooped during delivery, and I wouldn't have cared. I promise.

[Anonymous]

I have to say this worried me quite a bit. The whole pooping on the table part more than anything. I was also worried that once DH saw all my parts spread open with a baby emerging from it he would never look at me the same way again. None of that even popped into my head once I was on the table, all I could think about was getting that baby out one way or another. Random people kept walking by, feeling me up left and right, my OB kept wiping my butt, and I can honestly tell you that I cared not one bit. The second time around was easier, because I knew that I could cross this off the list of things to worry about.

[Anonymous]

Women have been having babies for centuries. Naked/ screaming/ peeing and pooping all over. Why not embrace it? What makes any one of us so unique that we think anyone is overly worried about it us enough to be embarrassed?

[Anonymous]

Just have the elective C. You are too posh to push.

[Anonymous]

I was naked for 2 days, and gave birth in front of an entire college class - let's hear it for teaching hospitals - and I did not care one bit who saw what. All kinds of gross stuff happened. I can't even remember, that's how little I cared about that, and I'm a person who will pretend I don't have a digestive system, and I've never pooed in my life before I would discuss this in public.

I was just happy this endless ordeal stopped and I finally had a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just have the elective C. You are too posh to push.

Then the doctors would REALLY see everything!

[Anonymous]

Beyond the "you won't care" -- which is completely true but hard for a FTM to believe, I think the analogy is this -- when you had the EKG, the cardiologist walked in, saw that you were somewhat undressed/the nurse wasn't done, and just started talking anyway. He wasn't phased by seeing breasts because he sees them on 50% of his patients and didn't see that as a reason to act uncomfortable, leave the room, look away etc. as that would make you more self conscious.

Same for OBs, OB nurses, pediatrics, and generally anyone who is around labor and delivery -- they see vaginas all day every day, they are used to women screaming, being in pain, acting irrational due to pain/fear etc. and they handle it matter of factly. They aren't going to call you out or do or say something to make you feel self conscious about what is a normal process that they see like 10x a day. And frankly they also want you to get the baby out safely. If you're a woman who makes noise or who needs to pace without an epidural or bounce on a ball or whatever -- they want you to do that within reason if that helps you get the baby out safely; they don't want you diverting your attention with "Dr. Smith thinks I'm lame bc I'm screaming, I have to force myself to stop" when you could be using your energy on pushing.

[Anonymous]

Echoing the others, you won't care. What's more, your's will be the countless number of vagina's that Dr's and nurses have seen. You're over thinking this

[Anonymous]

Your vagina is not anymore special than the thousands of others that the medical professionals have seen in their lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Once the pain starts, you don't give a f#*$

This is so true. I am a total prude who changes in private in the locker rooms and I delivered at Georgetown. Numerous residents, med students, attending a and nurses. I did not give a sh*t at all during delivery. Once DS was born, though, I went back to my prudish ways. You will be fine

[Anonymous]

I get where you're coming from. I'm one of those people who when I'm told at the dr. to take everything off and put on a gown -- I keep my underwear on if I know there is no need to access my breasts or down below. You'll be in a gown during labor and if it helps you can keep a bra on. I realize that isn't everything, but it'll at least help you not feel naked on top. As for the bottom half -- there is no choice and when you are ready to push, you will lose your inhibition, promise.

[Anonymous]

You will NOT CARE.Don't spend another second worrying about this.

[Anonymous]

And if you have a c - I think it's worse. Tie your arms down. My first was an emergency c-section - there were about ten people in the room and then I look up and see about 7 more through the window with a nice view There are "humiliating" aspects but the unbelievale pain, transcendent joy, and absolute lack of sleep about to come pretty much wipe all that out of your mind

[Anonymous]

I was an L&D nurse for 14 years and a dilating vaginal canal is a dime a dozen and nothing special WHAT SO EVER. Blood, poop, vomit = run of the mill. Its not even like "O I see it daily" its like "O I see it 2-3 times an hour". Trust me when I say you have nothing to be embarrassed about! And as a mom I don't think you will end up caring anyway! Congrats!

[Anonymous]

I chuckle now about putting a line in my birth plan about having as few people in the delivery room as possible. We ended up needing the NICU team because of meconium. I didn't even really notice they were there. Even after the baby was out and Iwas being stitched up. Your body doesn't feel like yours during labor.