Our 19-year-old cat - the time has come, but the vet wants to keep treating him

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our cat is almost 19 and has thyroid and kidney disease. Over the past couple of months he's been eating less, crying more, missing the litter box and throwing up a lot. During the past week he has been throwing up several times a day, and it's not a small amount. The vet wants to keep treating him, but, frankly, I'm tired of cleaning up the puddles of vomit. I adopted him when he was a kitten and I love him dearly, but I really think it's time to say goodbye. What can I do? Find another vet?

Please do not wait too long. My cat could not get up at the end and her tummy was losing fur due to sitting on wet bedding (could not change it when we were in work). I regretted letting her suffering too long because of the vet's guilt trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My experience is that vets always suggest continuing to treat. They always have another option for you to try -- another supplement, another pill, another procedure.

I got very cynical. I had a dog I loved, and I wanted desperately for him to live longer. But I realized that he was in pain and his quality of life was not good. The vet kept throwing more options at me, but my dog wasn't eating, could barely sleep comfortably and was obviously in pain (despite increasing pain meds, which were difficult to give to him because he wouldn't eat).

Finally, I just called the vet and said it was time, scheduled a home visit. End of discussion.

Afterwards, friends and family told me that they thought it was well past time, but they didn't want to upset me.

The vet had to know it was time, but I think that they'll keep treating until you say you're done. It angers me because, honestly, they have to realize that most people feel tremendously guilty when they make the decision. It would be helpful if the vet opened up the discussion and actually said, well, we can treat X condition, but at this point, due to his age and condition, it might be time to consider...

Sorry about your cat. and sorry to go on, but my point is that the vet will never say it's time. You usually have to tell the vet that that is what you want.

I think you need to realize that the vet likely kept throwing out options because the vet sensed your desperation and just like your friends, didn't want to upset you and thought what you wanted was the cat to be with you longer. Vets are human and I would guess have just as much trouble as us owners having to say good bye to loving animal and don't want to see people upset.

Our rabbit was going downhill rapidly. The vet knew that really there was no hope but he suggested a low cost treatment as a last measure. Not too make more money but because he knew I couldn't make the choice and was looking for some hope. I appreciated his compassion towards the situation. Our rabbit died peacefully at home later the next day.

[Anonymous]

Here's how I think of it: If it weren't for the treatment already given, the cat would have died a while back. Now, his life is being prolonged, but he's uncomfortable, and he doesn't understand why. Naturally, he should have died. Animals aren't programmed for suffering; they die of starvation or predation before the long-term suffering sets in.

Also, he has no fear of death. That's a purely human thing. So go into this knowing that you are easing him, giving him what nature intends he should have. YOU are the one in pain after his death. And that sucks, it truly does. But this insistence that we keep pets alive on chemo and IV steroids and whatever else the vets have handy... it just gives me the cold shudders. It's not right. Love your cat. Help him die peacefully, and know that you have honored his life.

(And now I'm crying. My boy is only 8, but I won't hesitate a minute when his time comes. And then I'll never be the same.)

[Anonymous]

Oh OP, my heart is aching as I read this. I am terribly sorry you and your kitty are going through this, but as all of us pet owners know, everyone has their time and when it is up, it is up.

First and foremost, I would see another vet just to get a second opinion.
It would be unfair to only rely on one Dr. with a situation like this.

However ultimately, the final decision rests on you.
If you truly feel your animal is in pain each and every day, then I know from experience how tough it is to make that last call.

I once had a dog in so much pain.
He was old, blind and had a ton of heart problems.
He wasn't taking his meds and he was just miserable. At the time, I was young and selfish and I just let him go on like that until finally my mother took over and put him down. Of course, she lied and said she was just taking him in to see the vet for a check-up which was probably the smartest thing to say since if she would have disclosed that she was going to euthanize him, I would have fought her tooth and nail.

When she came home with an empty leash, I had no choice but to accept my dog was gone.

Now 25 + yrs later with wisdom and maturity, I see that keeping him alive as he suffered day in and day out was just wrong.

I have two cats now and when they get to that stage in life where there is just no point going on, even though it will be the hardest thing in the world, I will give them the gift of a permanent escape from their pain.

Just my perspective.

[Anonymous]

We were in the same situation with our 17-year old cat (I posted this thread a couple months ago, http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/288792.page). The vet kept throwing out more and more treatment options despite the cats obvious discomfort and decline. It made us feel terrible.

I finally just called and said, "Look, my cat is failing and I want to have him put to sleep now. When can I bring him in?" They gave me an appointment for the next day and were very sympathetic. I just needed to be decisive, and they didn't question my choice.