I have a hard time dating because of my height

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 6'0.5 and I find that it makes dating men a million times harder . I try not to stress over my height because I can't change it .

It's not that I can't find men I can , it's just that men settle for me because of my height or they have a creepy height fetish nothing in between . Some men treat my height as a burden or they date me and still crave a shorter woman .

My cut off is 5'9 because I have back issues and being way taller than a guy makes me uncomfortable.

For a long time I thought it was my looks or my weight or my personality , I did everything to improve that but I still have a hard time because I'm too tall .

And most men's cutoff is 5'6" for a woman and 150lbs.

Do you see how you are the same?

[Anonymous]

Here's the thing - your 5'9" cut off for guys, in addition to being wildly hypocritical, is really hurting you. I'm 5'10" (so, also very tall for a woman, but not as much of an outlier as you) and actually the group of men I strike out with most are the 5'8" - 5'10" guys. They're taller than the VAST majority of women, so why would they pick one of the very few women that are taller than them?

The guys I've dated have all been 5'11" or taller OR under 5'7". Yeah, I've dated a lot of shorties, as small as 5'3". When you're a short dude, you have to make your peace with dating women who are taller than you (otherwise you eliminate like half the population), and once you've done that, what do you care if they're 2 inches taller than you or 7 inches taller than you?

So you're limiting yourself, and for a dumb reason. Bad back? Come on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here's the thing - your 5'9" cut off for guys, in addition to being wildly hypocritical, is really hurting you. I'm 5'10" (so, also very tall for a woman, but not as much of an outlier as you) and actually the group of men I strike out with most are the 5'8" - 5'10" guys. They're taller than the VAST majority of women, so why would they pick one of the very few women that are taller than them?

The guys I've dated have all been 5'11" or taller OR under 5'7". Yeah, I've dated a lot of shorties, as small as 5'3". When you're a short dude, you have to make your peace with dating women who are taller than you (otherwise you eliminate like half the population), and once you've done that, what do you care if they're 2 inches taller than you or 7 inches taller than you?

So you're limiting yourself, and for a dumb reason. Bad back? Come on.

OP here I am not a dominant person and I find the only short men interested in me have a domination fetish or they are massively insecure .Also tall men from what I've seen in my area also seek out shorter woman , both my tall brothers tell me they find a woman over 5'8 too tall for them . Lastly 5'10 you are as much as an outlier as me sis we are in the same boat most people can't tell the difference between us .

[Anonymous]

I don't know about your personality, but you sound attractive physically.

A man

[Anonymous]

You just need to be confident and own your height requirements.

There are plenty of tall men who want tall women. Although they often want kids if that is a a factor for you.

[Anonymous]

Go to a Tall Person meet up. Meet tall men!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You just need to be confident and own your height requirements.

There are plenty of tall men who want tall women. Although they often want kids if that is a a factor for you.

What if a tall woman is infertile what about then ? Do these men want tall daughters or only tall sons ?

[Anonymous]

Are you sure that your height is an impediment in your dating life??
I would think that men would be attracted to a tall woman…..

Anyway you just need to be a little more patient until you find the right guy.
Wishing you the best of luck OP!! 👍🏽

[Anonymous]

I am 5’10” and it’s never been an issue for me. My DH is 5’11” and I’ve dated men from 5’8” to 6’2”. All my height is in my legs but I have narrow shoulders and don’t present as a bigger person until I stand up. Maybe I am lucky. Wear feminine clothes and do your hair and make up and develop some confidence.

[Anonymous]

I think the Hinge dating app has height preferences

[Anonymous]

You need to move away from DC. The average height of men here I'd guess is 5"8'

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's the thing - your 5'9" cut off for guys, in addition to being wildly hypocritical, is really hurting you. I'm 5'10" (so, also very tall for a woman, but not as much of an outlier as you) and actually the group of men I strike out with most are the 5'8" - 5'10" guys. They're taller than the VAST majority of women, so why would they pick one of the very few women that are taller than them?

The guys I've dated have all been 5'11" or taller OR under 5'7". Yeah, I've dated a lot of shorties, as small as 5'3". When you're a short dude, you have to make your peace with dating women who are taller than you (otherwise you eliminate like half the population), and once you've done that, what do you care if they're 2 inches taller than you or 7 inches taller than you?

So you're limiting yourself, and for a dumb reason. Bad back? Come on.

I am 6’ 2” and have always been attracted to women over 6’. I even tailored my dating profile that way back when I was on OLD.

But you, OP, seem to view my preference as, how did you put it? “a weird height fetish?”

Honey, it’s not a fetish; it’s just what some of us prefer.


OP here I am not a dominant person and I find the only short men interested in me have a domination fetish or they are massively insecure .Also tall men from what I've seen in my area also seek out shorter woman , both my tall brothers tell me they find a woman over 5'8 too tall for them . Lastly 5'10 you are as much as an outlier as me sis we are in the same boat most people can't tell the difference between us .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's the thing - your 5'9" cut off for guys, in addition to being wildly hypocritical, is really hurting you. I'm 5'10" (so, also very tall for a woman, but not as much of an outlier as you) and actually the group of men I strike out with most are the 5'8" - 5'10" guys. They're taller than the VAST majority of women, so why would they pick one of the very few women that are taller than them?

The guys I've dated have all been 5'11" or taller OR under 5'7". Yeah, I've dated a lot of shorties, as small as 5'3". When you're a short dude, you have to make your peace with dating women who are taller than you (otherwise you eliminate like half the population), and once you've done that, what do you care if they're 2 inches taller than you or 7 inches taller than you?

So you're limiting yourself, and for a dumb reason. Bad back? Come on.

OP here I am not a dominant person and I find the only short men interested in me have a domination fetish or they are massively insecure .Also tall men from what I've seen in my area also seek out shorter woman , both my tall brothers tell me they find a woman over 5'8 too tall for them . Lastly 5'10 you are as much as an outlier as me sis we are in the same boat most people can't tell the difference between us .

PP here. I’ve literally never experienced this. In fact the short guys I’ve dated have been notably secure and confident. And you’ve dated MULTIPLE guys with a domination fetish?

I think it’s seriously worth considering that there’s something else going on here, and it’s an easy path to “blame” your lack of dating success on your height. It’s something you can’t change and isn’t your fault, so you can just throw up your hands and say “well, nothing I can do!” and avoid some introspection, taking some responsibility, and maybe making some changes. Do you have a blunt/honest close friend? That might be a good place to start - ask her if she has thoughts on your romantic life. Or maybe put a new post up on DCUM that talks through some things about you, your lifestyle, your approach to dating, some anecdotes about what isn’t working, completely ignoring your height. You might get some interesting thoughts. Or maybe a few sessions with a competent therapist might help you figure out what’s going on.

But honestly, I don’t think your height is what’s holding you back. You’ve got excuse after excuse and it doesn’t add up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I see big girls all I can think about is the massive turds they must take.

Where is your mother? Is your homework done? Go outside and play and stay out of grownup conversations.

[Anonymous]

You should go in vacation to the Netherlands, so many tall people there. It is the country with the tallest average height.

Learn to play golf. When I go to the range there seem to be a lot of taller guys who played sports in college. I’m married so I don’t care, but there are way more men than women there.