ILs take/divide up leftovers without asking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It doesn't sound like you're making enough food of everyone is fighting for it. Make more food or tell them before hand don't bring Tupperware as we're eating ALL the leftovers the next day.

OP here. There is enough for a full, multi-plate dinner; a full, multi-plate dinner the next day; turkey sandwiches; and then DH and I want anything else to stay in our home for us to enjoy, as we were the ones who bought all the food and cooked every dish.

If ILs want another meal of it, they should be making it at home, themselves. They are able-bodied, cook for themselves, and have enough money to feed themselves whatever they like.

We’re taking others’ advice and DH will be telling them ahead of time that everyone will have enough for the visit, but if there’s any leftovers after the visit, we are keeping them.

Yes op- don't listen to the people saying that you should be cooking MOAR FOOD, FFS.
Turkey and mashed potatoes and a can of cranberries are about the cheapest meal, especially now. They can buy a few frozen turkeys this week and be all set for months if they are dying for these leftovers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It doesn't sound like you're making enough food of everyone is fighting for it. Make more food or tell them before hand don't bring Tupperware as we're eating ALL the leftovers the next day.

OP here. There is enough for a full, multi-plate dinner; a full, multi-plate dinner the next day; turkey sandwiches; and then DH and I want anything else to stay in our home for us to enjoy, as we were the ones who bought all the food and cooked every dish.

If ILs want another meal of it, they should be making it at home, themselves. They are able-bodied, cook for themselves, and have enough money to feed themselves whatever they like.

We’re taking others’ advice and DH will be telling them ahead of time that everyone will have enough for the visit, but if there’s any leftovers after the visit, we are keeping them.

Your in-laws seem thoughtless and selfish.

However, the bolded statements on your post also suggest that you are not very generous.

Making a full turkey and all the sides is a lot of work that an elderly couple is just not going to do. Even if they are rich.

To me it feels like you're missing a bit of holiday spirit.

With my own family, I had to learn that my brother-in-law expects people to bring something for the holidays at his house. It's part of his family's culture. We're well off and he's well off. $20 worth of something, even $100 of something, doesn't matter to either of us. After my sister explained that small brought items made him happy we did all sorts of things to cater to that. My sister and I didn't care between us. So it was all to keep BIL happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It doesn't sound like you're making enough food of everyone is fighting for it. Make more food or tell them before hand don't bring Tupperware as we're eating ALL the leftovers the next day.

OP here. There is enough for a full, multi-plate dinner; a full, multi-plate dinner the next day; turkey sandwiches; and then DH and I want anything else to stay in our home for us to enjoy, as we were the ones who bought all the food and cooked every dish.

If ILs want another meal of it, they should be making it at home, themselves. They are able-bodied, cook for themselves, and have enough money to feed themselves whatever they like.

We’re taking others’ advice and DH will be telling them ahead of time that everyone will have enough for the visit, but if there’s any leftovers after the visit, we are keeping them.

Your in-laws seem thoughtless and selfish.

However, the bolded statements on your post also suggest that you are not very generous.

Making a full turkey and all the sides is a lot of work that an elderly couple is just not going to do. Even if they are rich.

To me it feels like you're missing a bit of holiday spirit.

With my own family, I had to learn that my brother-in-law expects people to bring something for the holidays at his house. It's part of his family's culture. We're well off and he's well off. $20 worth of something, even $100 of something, doesn't matter to either of us. After my sister explained that small brought items made him happy we did all sorts of things to cater to that. My sister and I didn't care between us. So it was all to keep BIL happy.

NP and OP is more than generous to host overnight guests, feed them enough holiday food for two full meals and a sandwich, in addition to breakfasts, etc.

[Anonymous]

If they love leftovers so much they should host.
I freaking LOVE Thanksgiving leftovers and my inlaws were loath to part with any, so I took over the holiday and make enough food that everyone can take some with plenty left for us.

[Anonymous]

LOL DH’s aunt from hell is exactly like this and 100x worse. We stopped hosting because of her as did my SIL. Hosting Thanksgiving for that side means cooking and buying a massive amount of food but that’s not enough, you have to make more than twice as much as needed. It gets up to 30-40 people so the poor hosts are struggling with 2 turkeys, 20 lbs of potatoes, 10 lbs f sweet potatoes, making a gallon of gravy, several Costco pies, etc etc. it’s awful.

She was angry the last time because there simply wasn’t room in our house to set up a full leftover packing table. She brought cheap restaurant take out containers and labeled them to return to Erma’s house ( ensuring a visit in her mind). She and her husband load up multiple for themselves and scurry it out to her car. She literally yells across the room that those turkey carcasses are HERS!

The best one is that she also takes whatever she and her husband want from the refrigerator and she tries to take cookware. I didn’t say anything as she was squeezing with piggish delight in finding cheese and other stuff she likes in our fridge. I did say enough when I caught her grabbing my good stockpot and Dutch oven. She had the nerve to say ooooh you can just come over and get it in a few weeks. I had to tell her no, it isn’t leaving my house.

[Anonymous]

They definitely sound rude and I agree with telling them that the leftovers will be served during the visit. It can be tricky to time Thanksgiving dinner, but if a slightly larger turkey wouldn't inconvenience you, I would probably cook a larger bird and peel a few extra potatoes for mashed potatoes. I would send them home with turkey, mashed potatoes, and a can of cranberry sauce.

[Anonymous]

This seems insane. Cooked turkey quality diminishes quite quickly in the fridge, who wants to save turkey for days later instead of eating it sooner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL DH’s aunt from hell is exactly like this and 100x worse. We stopped hosting because of her as did my SIL. Hosting Thanksgiving for that side means cooking and buying a massive amount of food but that’s not enough, you have to make more than twice as much as needed. It gets up to 30-40 people so the poor hosts are struggling with 2 turkeys, 20 lbs of potatoes, 10 lbs f sweet potatoes, making a gallon of gravy, several Costco pies, etc etc. it’s awful.

She was angry the last time because there simply wasn’t room in our house to set up a full leftover packing table. She brought cheap restaurant take out containers and labeled them to return to Erma’s house ( ensuring a visit in her mind). She and her husband load up multiple for themselves and scurry it out to her car. She literally yells across the room that those turkey carcasses are HERS!

The best one is that she also takes whatever she and her husband want from the refrigerator and she tries to take cookware. I didn’t say anything as she was squeezing with piggish delight in finding cheese and other stuff she likes in our fridge. I did say enough when I caught her grabbing my good stockpot and Dutch oven. She had the nerve to say ooooh you can just come over and get it in a few weeks. I had to tell her no, it isn’t leaving my house.

I would watch video of this! Spycam of the greedies going through your fridge!

[Anonymous]

That's very rude of them.

I think you need to beat them to the punch when it comes to putting away the leftovers. Once everyone has gotten their food and seconds, if the food is cool enough, put it away asap.

If that doesn't work, do what you did last year and break out "their" leftovers.

And if that does not work, tell your houseguests they are on their own for food other than the Thanksgiving meal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It doesn't sound like you're making enough food of everyone is fighting for it. Make more food or tell them before hand don't bring Tupperware as we're eating ALL the leftovers the next day.

OP here. There is enough for a full, multi-plate dinner; a full, multi-plate dinner the next day; turkey sandwiches; and then DH and I want anything else to stay in our home for us to enjoy, as we were the ones who bought all the food and cooked every dish.

If ILs want another meal of it, they should be making it at home, themselves. They are able-bodied, cook for themselves, and have enough money to feed themselves whatever they like.

We’re taking others’ advice and DH will be telling them ahead of time that everyone will have enough for the visit, but if there’s any leftovers after the visit, we are keeping them.

Good!

[Anonymous]

Let them pack up what they want and be sure to spit in it before they leave.

Pigs get fed, hogs get slaughtered.

[Anonymous]

Give them a Safeway gift card for $25 in their tupperware so they can buy food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL DH’s aunt from hell is exactly like this and 100x worse. We stopped hosting because of her as did my SIL. Hosting Thanksgiving for that side means cooking and buying a massive amount of food but that’s not enough, you have to make more than twice as much as needed. It gets up to 30-40 people so the poor hosts are struggling with 2 turkeys, 20 lbs of potatoes, 10 lbs f sweet potatoes, making a gallon of gravy, several Costco pies, etc etc. it’s awful.

She was angry the last time because there simply wasn’t room in our house to set up a full leftover packing table. She brought cheap restaurant take out containers and labeled them to return to Erma’s house ( ensuring a visit in her mind). She and her husband load up multiple for themselves and scurry it out to her car. She literally yells across the room that those turkey carcasses are HERS!

The best one is that she also takes whatever she and her husband want from the refrigerator and she tries to take cookware. I didn’t say anything as she was squeezing with piggish delight in finding cheese and other stuff she likes in our fridge. I did say enough when I caught her grabbing my good stockpot and Dutch oven. She had the nerve to say ooooh you can just come over and get it in a few weeks. I had to tell her no, it isn’t leaving my house.

I suspect this is my ex MIL. She would literally just take anything she wanted from my house.
This whole thread is making me so grateful I only have immediate family for Thanksgiving and I don’t have to go anywhere.

[Anonymous]

We’re taking others’ advice and DH will be telling them ahead of time that everyone will have enough for the visit, but if there’s any leftovers after the visit, we are keeping them.

I find this just as rude as what they're doing. Leftovers should be for the meal the next day, to be shared by all. You're under absolutely no obligation to make extra so there can be leftovers above that for people to bring home. But if it turns out there are additional leftovers, it's normal to allow people to take a portion home. And they in turn should not be greedy and take all of it.

[Anonymous]

Why hasn’t your husband addressed this with his parents?

That’s a husband problem.