What's the best insult you've ever heard?

[Anonymous]

Yo, Mama's so fat she sat on a rainbow and Skittles popped out.

[Anonymous]

The only people doing yo mama jokes these days work in the White House.

[Anonymous]

The best insults are usually lewd, for shock value.

[Anonymous]

My favorite was always a printed novelty business card that said "You are cordially invited to go f*** yourself" in fancy cursive font. It wasn't really a joke per se, but I got a good laugh from it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only people doing yo mama jokes these days work in the White House.

Why you being so racist?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Shakespeare was the all time master of creative insults.

Yes! I have the Shakespearean insult coffee mug with a list of insults wrapped around it. It’s hanging next to the grumpy cat mug. Not sure what that says about me ..but I digress.

Some listed:
"Thou art a boil, a plague sore"
"beetle-headed flap-ear'd knave"
"Away, you three inch fool"
"Thou artless fen-sucked foot-licker"
"I am sick when I do look upon thee"
Oh gull, O dolt, As ignorant as dirt"
"lump of foul deformity"

I have this mug too! It makes me laugh.

I like to throw out “scurvy knave” when I get the chance.

[Anonymous]

“Gosh it’s so nice to finally meet you/ I feel like you’ve been a part of our families life for so long now- how nice to get to now out a face to a name. I have to admit- I’m so grateful you and xxx found one another. I’m not too proud to admit I might have been petty or felt spiteful about xxx’s infidelities; had you been, say, younger, or prettier, or wealthier than me. I’m so grateful now that I’ve met you, I can just love you! BLess your heart”.

[Anonymous]

I recently heard this about a group of people (all men in this case) who were super confused or unable to move forward on a big work project: “these guys are just sitting around choking on their own dicks.”

That was so crude and I loled to hard

[Anonymous]

"You are the puss-oozing, festering abscess on the a**hole of humanity"

[Anonymous]

Bless your heart! Every trash can truly has its own lid, right?

[Anonymous]

The best part of you ran down your daddy's leg.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I recently heard "You're dumber than a day-old donut," and maybe it's the alliteration, but I am really loving it. Your turn!

That doesn't even make sense. Sounds like what the PreK kid of a cop would say. You need to up your game. Start with some "yo momma" jokes and work up from there.

Humor dryer than a day-old donut.

[Anonymous]

Madder than a box of frogs

Madder than Mad Max MacMad

(these are two of my favorite insults)

[Anonymous]

You're as helpful as taste buds on an assh0le.

[Anonymous]

Dumb as a bag of hammers.