is anyone worried about their kid finding their spouse in college?
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Anonymous
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Not at all.
More interested in his ability to have women as friends, which he does. |
Anonymous
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I encourage my kids to not think about marriage until their brains are more developed.
I DO want my kids to go to a school that has a lot of kids they click with, so I guess that would include friends AND partners. And, for posted that thinks their kids are going to stay local bc they went to college nearby. Good luck with that. When your kid graduates, it’s about what they want, not you |
Anonymous
| Nope. I assume that my kids are like I was at that age: very much not ready to pick a long-term partner. |
Anonymous
| Whoa. That's not on my radar at all. No I think DC is maybe more likely to find someone who is a good match at their university that draws kids with certain similarities? Yes. But, DC just got out of a relationship and I hope they stay single for a little bit. They are not feeling good about finding someone new at school, but there is plenty of time for that as they all mature. I do hope DC dates in college (b/c I know that is important to them), but I'm not thinking at all about their future spouse. I didn't meet mine until after undergrad and that worked out just fine. |
Anonymous
| That usually happens for wealthy people now OP, not so much for middle class young adults. |
Anonymous
Yes I am worried they will find their spouse in college. It's much too early. |
Anonymous
I also would like my son to be a little older by the time he finds a spouse. Dating is fine but I don't want him to find someone so soon. Same with my daughter - she is much younger so I am not thinking about that right now. |
Anonymous
Very outdated. Do you have a daughter or son? I can't imagine being concerned about this AT ALL |
Anonymous
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Yes and it's why I took California schools off their lists. I don't want them settling down with someone who is from so far away.
BTW OP, this happens whether or not you are in favor of it. This is one thing that you truly have no control over. So of course it should be a consideration. |
Anonymous
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Here’s the issue: nowadays, most high-caliber women want to wait a while to see what they and a future mate might become. No one wants to marry a non-ambitious dude and regret it.
So, unless your son is heading out to a clear lucrative pathway - medical school, law school, Wall Street followed by business school, etc. - no high-end girl wants to hitch a ride immediately after undergraduate school. If the girl comes from a modest or religious background or is unambitious herself, she might be interested in an engineer or CS dude with a good paying job right out of school. |
Anonymous
| Nope. Mine is phd bound so more long term stops before settling down. I do find the marriage pact amusing, though, and I like that the kids don’t take it seriously. |
Anonymous
| Goodness no. And what do you mean by the right fit? Schools where kids want to marry early or schools where they are headed to Wall Street? I went to the latter and there weren't that many marriages about classmates, and certainly not that many that lasted. |
Anonymous
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Worried, no
If they find someone, great If not, there will be time after college But yes, I want them to go somewhere that is a good fit, academically and socially - for many reasons but I guess one bonus would be more likely to vibe with the other kids and find someone they would like to date. Definitely no engagement or marriage in college. |
Anonymous
| My niece and nephew are 2 and 3 years out of college and still dating their college BF/GF and both likely heading towards marriage. While their parents like the BF and GF, they are worried that their kids have not dated enough yet to settle down and that there may be bad consequences down the road. But who knows? |
Anonymous
| I'd be worried if they did find a spouse in college. Then again, we didn't marry until our 30s, so my view is colored by that. |