Father's not in the picture? Why are so many posters completely letting the father off the hook here? |
Third option - ask DH to share the responsibility of parenting. |
| OP - Dh is the breadwinner in our family and has a very stressful job and travels quite a bit. So all of the appointments end up being pushed onto me. It is what it is at this point. So I end up prioritizing the kids appointments and mine just slip to the wayside. |
| We chose dentist and orthodontist that the kids can get to on their own. I only went to the first orthodontist appointment and they started going to the dentist by themselves by 8th grade. One of my kids has disabilities and frequent appointments related to that and unless she's experiencing a flare, it's not too overwhelming. |
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It’s hard sometimes to put ourselves first. I had a health crisis before I realized I need to make time for me too, otherwise I wasn’t going to be here for my kids.
A possible motivator to get your checkups: cancer is going up since Covid. |
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A screening mammogram is like a 15 minute appointment. I know many people on here don’t like WRA but I’ve had only good experiences with them and can typically get in and out in under 30 minutes. The Park Potomac location has appointments starting at 7 am. And at least in Maryland, if you’re over 40 you don’t need a script for it.
If you’re done having kids and don’t have any particular gyn issues, you don’t really need a separate well woman exam at a GYn. You can get a pap and breast exam with a GP. So that can knock one appointment out. |
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I have an annual Doctor Day in January. I've done this for years. In September (I actually plan to do it this week!) I make a list of all the appointments I need this year, then I call through and schedule them all for the same day in January. Call the one you think will have the toughest scheduling first (usually that's any kind of specialist, but my dentist also weirdly fills up fast) and then go through the list.
For me this year it's GP, gyno, dentist, mammogram, dermatologist, hematologist. My dentist and dermatologist are in the same building and the radiologist is only a few blocks away, which helps. And the gyno and hematologist are at the same location as well. If you've got more than you can fit in a day, or they're further apart geographically, then just pick your priorities and do them. It is funny to call and they're like "okay, next available is October 12th, I've got an 11am and a 3pm" and I'm like "No, I want January 22nd, ideally around 1pm?" But it works! |
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#1 pediatrician needs to have Saturday hours
#2 mammograms often on Saturdays at a hospital imaging center #3 earliest AM appts at orthodontist #4 some vaccines on weekends at pharmacies #5 dad has to cover some appointments My work gives us $1,500 per year if we get a physical. I never miss that. |
| I can't remember the last time DH or I went to a doctor for ourselves. We did one big check up in our 40s each. We do get annual shots at the CVS though, and if actually sick, we go to a minute clinic. We are approaching 60. Neither of my parents needed any medication for chronic conditions and neither has major medical issues. DH has some family conditions in the mix, but also extreme longevity, so we probably should schedule another appointment. I think for us it's just inertia. |
15 minutes? Last time I went, the women in the waiting room started shuffling their appointments to prioritize the women who were going to have to leave without the mammogram because they had been waiting for hours and had to pick their kids up from daycare and school. They always seem to be backed up. |
Yes. In and out in less than 30 minutes. Park Potomac location. It probably helps that I do early morning appointments. I’ve been going there for years. |
This assumes that you are either 1) not waiting for results, or 2) have only had clear mammograms. As someone who had DCIS, I can tell you that if you have anything at all suspicious, even the most efficient mammogram clinic will take at least an hour, more likely two. |
You should have had bloodwork, mammograms, and colonoscopies based on current typical practice. My family also has extreme longevity (all grandparents lived to be 90-100) but my generation eats worse and is more sedentary and stressed. |
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It is hard, but in a family like yours, think of how it would all fall apart without you.
Make the appointments today, and then just honor them as you would another family member’s appointment. You are also a role model for your children, Your husband has to step up more. Share with your husband (or sisters? Mom?) how you are neglecting your health. Hopefully, they will care enough to come through for you. |
Tell him how you have made his absences “work.” He should care. |