UMC woman yelling at her husband (possibly ex-husband) to "look alive" at youth sporting event

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are times when I wished I had the guts to say that to my DH in public. He sits there spaced out like a bump on a log when all of the other dads are socializing and I hate it.

Suffering in silence is no fun.
Speak up .. Share that w your husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are times when I wished I had the guts to say that to my DH in public. He sits there spaced out like a bump on a log when all of the other dads are socializing and I hate it.

Suffering in silence is no fun.
Speak up .. Share that w your husband.

I speak up in private and he brushes me off or worse, says I shouldn’t tell him what to do. He’s all about appearances and I think if he was called out in public he’d shape up. But then I would be the public bad guy/shrew/nag. Tradeoffs. I’m resigned to being the hands-on parent that talks to other parents and makes nice so my kid won’t be excluded because their parent acts like an aloof jerk.

[Anonymous]

"quietly chuckle"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He probably has autism or adhd. Flat affect is an indicator. Ben Affleck is not a role model either.

It is not, in fact, an “indicator.”

[Anonymous]

My guess is her outburst wasn’t about him not cheering loudly enough. He’s probably unengaged as a husband and parent and she’s at her wits end and just lost it.

[Anonymous]

When i tell my DH to look alive, it means do not close your eyes and pretend to sleep.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't say that in public, but I have in private when DH checks out of parenting. He seems to think that if I, or any grandparent, am present, then he's automatically off duty and can ignore even the most egregious behavior or safety issues. He's so lazy it's infuriating. He deserves to be embarrassed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are times when I wished I had the guts to say that to my DH in public. He sits there spaced out like a bump on a log when all of the other dads are socializing and I hate it.

Suffering in silence is no fun.
Speak up .. Share that w your husband.

I speak up in private and he brushes me off or worse, says I shouldn’t tell him what to do. He’s all about appearances and I think if he was called out in public he’d shape up. But then I would be the public bad guy/shrew/nag. Tradeoffs. I’m resigned to being the hands-on parent that talks to other parents and makes nice so my kid won’t be excluded because their parent acts like an aloof jerk.

This. People get loud when they're being ignored.

Some men are just lazy and public humiliation may get through to them when a calm discussion doesn't break through their denial and selfishness.

[Anonymous]

This is predictable DCUM. The wife screaming in public is immediately defended and the husband must be a terrible parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is predictable DCUM. The wife screaming in public is immediately defended and the husband must be a terrible parent.

Why did these women even get married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is predictable DCUM. The wife screaming in public is immediately defended and the husband must be a terrible parent.

Why did these women even get married?

They’re doing the best they can. They want kids and a family. They don’t know how to create the loving one that they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is predictable DCUM. The wife screaming in public is immediately defended and the husband must be a terrible parent.

Why did these women even get married?

They’re doing the best they can. They want kids and a family. They don’t know how to create the loving one that they want.

Or because he wasn't like that originally. It's the effect of aging, or that he can't handle two kids even though he did okay with just one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is predictable DCUM. The wife screaming in public is immediately defended and the husband must be a terrible parent.

This is a minor comment that this person wasn't even part of. It says more about OP that they care about some two word comment made 30 yards away from them in a private conversation that OP knows nothing about. OP has issues and is the one who is incredibly judgmental.

Its also just a silly comment for anyone who has been at a sporting event with a guy who is into sports. Men have gotten kicked out of sporting events at a much higher rate than women. If they are in charge of something many are known to be extremely rude and condescending to women and many of them have loud voices but just feel justified in anything they say. They often don't follow the rules as parents, coaches, or volunteers and are known to gossip about and berate players and parents they dont like in public. If this was turned around, OP wouldn't think anything of it especially if it wasn't the husband saying it. Men think they can say this stuff to any woman and dont limit it to just their wife.

[Anonymous]

[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is predictable DCUM. The wife screaming in public is immediately defended and the husband must be a terrible parent.

This is a minor comment that this person wasn't even part of. It says more about OP that they care about some two word comment made 30 yards away from them in a private conversation that OP knows nothing about. OP has issues and is the one who is incredibly judgmental.

It’s also just a silly comment for anyone who has been at a sporting event with a guy who is into sports. Men have gotten kicked out of sporting events at a much higher rate than women. If they are in charge of something many are known to be extremely rude and condescending to women and many of them have loud voices but just feel justified in anything they say. They often don't follow the rules as parents, coaches, or volunteers and are known to gossip about and berate players and parents they dont like in public. If this was turned around, OP wouldn't think anything of it especially if it wasn't the husband saying it. Men think they can say this stuff to any woman and dont limit it to just their wife.

It wasn’t a private conversation if it could be heard 30 yards away, and yes I would look twice at a man who yelled this at his wife. At least once, I stopped making professional recommendations for a man based on his youth sports behavior.

[Anonymous]

Well there obviously aren't enough men that do because sports are riddled with men that display bad behavior.