My Mom Worked Her Whole Life, But Only Gets My Dad's Social Security — Feels Like a Scam

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in her late 70s and just applied for Social Security. She worked her whole life, earned about $75K a year, and paid into the system for decades. My dad passed away over 15 years ago in his early 70s, made over $200K a year, and never collected a dime.

Now she’s being told she only gets one benefit — hers or his, whichever is higher. Not both. So all the money she paid in is just gone. If this were a 401(k), she’d have access to everything she earned. Instead, the government keeps it.

It’s infuriating. She should be getting both benefits. Instead, the government pockets tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars they both paid in.

Honestly, I would’ve rather not been forced to pay into this broken system at all. Let people save for themselves. This whole thing feels like a scam. We need to stop pretending Social Security is working — it’s not. It’s robbing people who did everything right.

On your logic, your mom shouldn’t be entitled to your dad’s much higher payment because that was his money…not hers.

I am failing to see how your mom is being cheated in this scenario nor why you are complaining.

Seems like the fair answer is she gets hers only.

Who should get the money my dad put in all his life? If not my mom then who?

Your mom is getting it…she’s getting way more than she deserves based on what she paid into the system.

Your dad could have started collecting 8 years earlier but didn’t.

The system is based on a set of assumptions based on life expectancies. If your dad had lived until 90, then he would have pulled out more than he ever put into it…are you suggesting he should then be cut off earlier than that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in her late 70s and just applied for Social Security. She worked her whole life, earned about $75K a year, and paid into the system for decades. My dad passed away over 15 years ago in his early 70s, made over $200K a year, and never collected a dime.

Now she’s being told she only gets one benefit — hers or his, whichever is higher. Not both. So all the money she paid in is just gone. If this were a 401(k), she’d have access to everything she earned. Instead, the government keeps it.

It’s infuriating. She should be getting both benefits. Instead, the government pockets tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars they both paid in.

Honestly, I would’ve rather not been forced to pay into this broken system at all. Let people save for themselves. This whole thing feels like a scam. We need to stop pretending Social Security is working — it’s not. It’s robbing people who did everything right.

On your logic, your mom shouldn’t be entitled to your dad’s much higher payment because that was his money…not hers.

I am failing to see how your mom is being cheated in this scenario nor why you are complaining.

Seems like the fair answer is she gets hers only.

Who should get the money my dad put in all his life? If not my mom then who?

or rather who gets all the money my mom put in? This is outrageous.

That's like arguing that the sky shouldn't be blue. It's how the system works to the benefit of many who would have nothing otherwise. I do wonder if you're a troll just trying to make the case to abolish SSI.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in her late 70s and just applied for Social Security. She worked her whole life, earned about $75K a year, and paid into the system for decades. My dad passed away over 15 years ago in his early 70s, made over $200K a year, and never collected a dime.

Now she’s being told she only gets one benefit — hers or his, whichever is higher. Not both. So all the money she paid in is just gone. If this were a 401(k), she’d have access to everything she earned. Instead, the government keeps it.

It’s infuriating. She should be getting both benefits. Instead, the government pockets tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars they both paid in.

Honestly, I would’ve rather not been forced to pay into this broken system at all. Let people save for themselves. This whole thing feels like a scam. We need to stop pretending Social Security is working — it’s not. It’s robbing people who did everything right.

On your logic, your mom shouldn’t be entitled to your dad’s much higher payment because that was his money…not hers.

I am failing to see how your mom is being cheated in this scenario nor why you are complaining.

Seems like the fair answer is she gets hers only.

Who should get the money my dad put in all his life? If not my mom then who?

or rather who gets all the money my mom put in? This is outrageous.

If your mom claimed your dad’s ss 15 years ago as she was entitled she likely would have received more than what was put into the system by you dad. Some people come out ahead, some don’t (my dad dies at 48 so he didn’t). It’s not a retirement account. Your problem is that your mom and you didn’t bother to learn SS rules.

[Anonymous]

Think of it this way, OP -- your mom IS getting all the money she contributed to SS, and it is being "topped off" (i.e. increased) to the amount that is larger b/t her and her husband. So, in effect, your mom is getting a windfall benefit -- she is getting MORE than she paid into the system b/c she is allowed to get some of your dad's contributions as well.

Your dad, on the other hand, got nothing of what he put in b/c he died before taking it. He could have taken it earlier and received SOME of what he had contributed. But, alas, the "penalty" for dying is that you don't get to collect SS benefits.

Your mom is getting all that she is owed, AND THEN SOME MORE based on her spouse's work history.

The nature of insurance is that some people will get less than they have paid into the system and some people will get more than they have paid into it. You don't know which group you will be in, so you contribute to the system so that you are protected if you need it. Your dad didn't "need" it b/c he died. Your mom may live a long life, and collect on her own behalf, and partially on his behalf.

[Anonymous]

You don't understand the concept, OP.

You don't get back the exact sum you paid into Social Security. You pay for others; and when it's your turn, others pay for you. Those two sums will not be the same. The amount you get is also affected by your spouse and your decisions.

Did you know that as a legal immigrant on a visa, I pay into Social Security but am not entitled to any Social Security benefits? Yet I also pay all my taxes to the IRS, state and federal. I work and contribute to the GDP of this country.

You want to talk about unfair?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in her late 70s and just applied for Social Security. She worked her whole life, earned about $75K a year, and paid into the system for decades. My dad passed away over 15 years ago in his early 70s, made over $200K a year, and never collected a dime.

Now she’s being told she only gets one benefit — hers or his, whichever is higher. Not both. So all the money she paid in is just gone. If this were a 401(k), she’d have access to everything she earned. Instead, the government keeps it.

It’s infuriating. She should be getting both benefits. Instead, the government pockets tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars they both paid in.

Honestly, I would’ve rather not been forced to pay into this broken system at all. Let people save for themselves. This whole thing feels like a scam. We need to stop pretending Social Security is working — it’s not. It’s robbing people who did everything right.

On your logic, your mom shouldn’t be entitled to your dad’s much higher payment because that was his money…not hers.

I am failing to see how your mom is being cheated in this scenario nor why you are complaining.

Seems like the fair answer is she gets hers only.

Who should get the money my dad put in all his life? If not my mom then who?

or rather who gets all the money my mom put in? This is outrageous.

That's like arguing that the sky shouldn't be blue. It's how the system works to the benefit of many who would have nothing otherwise. I do wonder if you're a troll just trying to make the case to abolish SSI.

No, I thought my mom would get both

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Think of it this way, OP -- your mom IS getting all the money she contributed to SS, and it is being "topped off" (i.e. increased) to the amount that is larger b/t her and her husband. So, in effect, your mom is getting a windfall benefit -- she is getting MORE than she paid into the system b/c she is allowed to get some of your dad's contributions as well.

Your dad, on the other hand, got nothing of what he put in b/c he died before taking it. He could have taken it earlier and received SOME of what he had contributed. But, alas, the "penalty" for dying is that you don't get to collect SS benefits.

Your mom is getting all that she is owed, AND THEN SOME MORE based on her spouse's work history.

The nature of insurance is that some people will get less than they have paid into the system and some people will get more than they have paid into it. You don't know which group you will be in, so you contribute to the system so that you are protected if you need it. Your dad didn't "need" it b/c he died. Your mom may live a long life, and collect on her own behalf, and partially on his behalf.

I didn't consider it insurance but a savings pension plan, I wonder if I am the only one because why bother sending me statements of my social security total contributions it makes it seem like that is money saved for someone

[Anonymous]

Your Dad got the security of knowing he could count on some income after retirement...which turns out he was not able to enjoy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in her late 70s and just applied for Social Security. She worked her whole life, earned about $75K a year, and paid into the system for decades. My dad passed away over 15 years ago in his early 70s, made over $200K a year, and never collected a dime.

Now she’s being told she only gets one benefit — hers or his, whichever is higher. Not both. So all the money she paid in is just gone. If this were a 401(k), she’d have access to everything she earned. Instead, the government keeps it.

It’s infuriating. She should be getting both benefits. Instead, the government pockets tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars they both paid in.

Honestly, I would’ve rather not been forced to pay into this broken system at all. Let people save for themselves. This whole thing feels like a scam. We need to stop pretending Social Security is working — it’s not. It’s robbing people who did everything right.

On your logic, your mom shouldn’t be entitled to your dad’s much higher payment because that was his money…not hers.

I am failing to see how your mom is being cheated in this scenario nor why you are complaining.

Seems like the fair answer is she gets hers only.

Who should get the money my dad put in all his life? If not my mom then who?

or rather who gets all the money my mom put in? This is outrageous.

That's like arguing that the sky shouldn't be blue. It's how the system works to the benefit of many who would have nothing otherwise. I do wonder if you're a troll just trying to make the case to abolish SSI.

No, I thought my mom would get both

You thought wrong. Failure to understand how it works is yours/your mom’s fault!!

[Anonymous]

Of course if your mom never worked and never contributed...she would still collect his. That is the more unfair part

[Anonymous]

I frankly think she shouldn’t even get the his/her option and she should only get hers.

You father should’ve started collecting at 62.

[Anonymous]

Australia does this much better. They have something like a forced savings plan for retirement account where every single person needs to put a certain percentage of their income earned - I think it’s around 9% - called superannuation. Then you can access it (your own funds) at retirement age but not before.an All employers are forced to withhold that amount and put it in the account for that employee. Like a tax but you get it back. And it sits as an investment that you can mange (like with risk levels) in the meantime.

I agree that it’s unfair for some people to pay into the system - our broken system - for years and get nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I frankly think she shouldn’t even get the his/her option and she should only get hers.

You father should’ve started collecting at 62.

He worked until death

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in her late 70s and just applied for Social Security. She worked her whole life, earned about $75K a year, and paid into the system for decades. My dad passed away over 15 years ago in his early 70s, made over $200K a year, and never collected a dime.

Now she’s being told she only gets one benefit — hers or his, whichever is higher. Not both. So all the money she paid in is just gone. If this were a 401(k), she’d have access to everything she earned. Instead, the government keeps it.

It’s infuriating. She should be getting both benefits. Instead, the government pockets tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars they both paid in.

Honestly, I would’ve rather not been forced to pay into this broken system at all. Let people save for themselves. This whole thing feels like a scam. We need to stop pretending Social Security is working — it’s not. It’s robbing people who did everything right.

On your logic, your mom shouldn’t be entitled to your dad’s much higher payment because that was his money…not hers.

I am failing to see how your mom is being cheated in this scenario nor why you are complaining.

Seems like the fair answer is she gets hers only.

Who should get the money my dad put in all his life? If not my mom then who?

or rather who gets all the money my mom put in? This is outrageous.

That's like arguing that the sky shouldn't be blue. It's how the system works to the benefit of many who would have nothing otherwise. I do wonder if you're a troll just trying to make the case to abolish SSI.

No, I thought my mom would get both

Under what reasonably fair world would your mom get both? That’s not the point of SS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course if your mom never worked and never contributed...she would still collect his. That is the more unfair part

Why? She helped earn it if she was looking after the house and kids while he was working a big job.