What is going on - 7 year old / Santa

[Anonymous]

In our family we believe in the joy of giving...and santa represents that in everyone. We still do 'santa' with my young adult kids. Its fun.

OP I would follow your daughter's lead. I do not think she forgot but she is still going to ask for presents as always. No reason to change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:2 DCs had fun believed in Santa until older one heard some kids said it’s not real at school ( around 7 or 8), then started to get skeptical. I waited another year (so the younger DC would continue the Santa fun), then told DCs Santa would start to visit only kids their families were struggling financially and couldn’t afford to buy gifts. For families could buy gifts, the parents would take over Santa’s job and get gifts. Both DCs understood and it was a smooth way to stop the Santa tradition.

This is... a weird way to lie to your kids for sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:2 DCs had fun believed in Santa until older one heard some kids said it’s not real at school ( around 7 or 8), then started to get skeptical. I waited another year (so the younger DC would continue the Santa fun), then told DCs Santa would start to visit only kids their families were struggling financially and couldn’t afford to buy gifts. For families could buy gifts, the parents would take over Santa’s job and get gifts. Both DCs understood and it was a smooth way to stop the Santa tradition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2 DCs had fun believed in Santa until older one heard some kids said it’s not real at school ( around 7 or 8), then started to get skeptical. I waited another year (so the younger DC would continue the Santa fun), then told DCs Santa would start to visit only kids their families were struggling financially and couldn’t afford to buy gifts. For families could buy gifts, the parents would take over Santa’s job and get gifts. Both DCs understood and it was a smooth way to stop the Santa tradition.

This is a dumb lie. Sometimes poor kids gets zero gifts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2 DCs had fun believed in Santa until older one heard some kids said it’s not real at school ( around 7 or 8), then started to get skeptical. I waited another year (so the younger DC would continue the Santa fun), then told DCs Santa would start to visit only kids their families were struggling financially and couldn’t afford to buy gifts. For families could buy gifts, the parents would take over Santa’s job and get gifts. Both DCs understood and it was a smooth way to stop the Santa tradition.

This is a dumb lie. Sometimes poor kids gets zero gifts.

Plus they will notice their mostly well off classmates receiving gifts. Total fail.

OP, your kid wants to be a kid and enjoy the magic. Just go with it. Everyone at my house, including college graduates “believes.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 12yo still talks about Santa.
I told her she’s too old now, Santa’s not coming. She said yes he is.
She knows, she just likes the magic and pretend of Christmas .

That sounds kind of harsh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is 12 and still makes comments like he believes so we are letting it be. I would guess that he knows that Santa isn't real but who cares? It is a fun time of year with a fun tradition. It makes him happy on Christmas morning and we have a bit of fun Christmas Eve. It doesn't hurt anything. I don't remember ever having a conversation with my parents about Santa or the Easter Bunny. I do remember hiding eggs for my younger brother one year.

Same here. I never asked my parents… I gradually figured it out but still enjoyed the game. My older kid did the same, and I suspect that’s what my younger one is doing now. Neither has ever asked if Santa’s real.

[Anonymous]

In our house they knew by 8 to 10. I told them Santa is the spirit of Xmas and we are all Santa in some way. In our house, if you don’t believe he does not come to our home and drop off gifts (3 gifts each) . You get a present from mom and dad and that’s it. Even the teenagers talk about Santa as if he was someone else. They Make cookies for Santa and make a list. I think our whole family just likes to pretend and we enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

She's probably just playing along and enjoying the tradition. No need to make a thing about it.

[Anonymous]

She wants to continue the magic of believing, but deep down she wanted to know the truth now that she knows the truth, she can go back to the fun of believing without the existential wondering. What a sweet spot for her!

So I would continue to pretend there is Santa.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 12yo still talks about Santa.
I told her she’s too old now, Santa’s not coming. She said yes he is.
She knows, she just likes the magic and pretend of Christmas .

Santa still comes to our house and my kids are in their 20/30s. Obviously they haven't believed in Santa since they were 7-8 but they love the tradition of a Christmas stocking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 12yo still talks about Santa.
I told her she’s too old now, Santa’s not coming. She said yes he is.
She knows, she just likes the magic and pretend of Christmas .

Santa still comes to our house and my kids are in their 20/30s. Obviously they haven't believed in Santa since they were 7-8 but they love the tradition of a Christmas stocking.

Op here - Santa came to my parents house after my siblings and I were all married. I LOVE Santa (in fact, cried when my older daughter found out the truth.) I was just confused whether she forgot our discussion completely, but I like the idea that she just wanted to know and now can go back to enjoying the magic of the season.

My older DD (now 12) told me she remembers me being sad, whereas she felt a huge relief. She said it was hard to worry whether she’d been good enough for Santa to come and it was also scary that a stranger would be coming into the home. Once she knew, it was just fun.

[Anonymous]

Op here with an update - last night she asked me if DH and I are Santa. I wasn’t as gentle as I might have been - I was putting a book away on her bookshelf and I said “Yes, we discussed this.”

She looked crestfallen and said “so you do stockings and the tree?”

I snuggled her and said “yes, did you not remember?”

She said “you always said you did the tree and Santa did stockings. So when I asked a few weeks ago whether you actually did the stockings, and you said yes, I assumed Santa did the tree and you did the stockings.”

She then said “This all makes it feel less magical” and I said I agreed, but there are still ways for the season to feel magical. And then she said, “the worst part is, for the thing I most wanted, we needed a magical flying sleigh.” I asked her what that was and she said (because of her obsession with pandas) “I really wanted a rock that came from China.”

My DH has some ideas, but we are now working on getting a rock from China and would never have thought of that otherwise….

[Anonymous]

Jade often comes from China. I bet you could find a jade panda.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jade often comes from China. I bet you could find a jade panda.

Op here. That's exactly what my husband said!