Single Dad with Pre K3 Daughter Moving to DC for 3 Years, Where to Live?

Anonymous
One last thought you should hire a nanny to care for child and not expect other fanilies to baby sit regularly. That is not their responsibility and to expect it is kinda pushy
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:One last thought you should hire a nanny to care for child and not expect other fanilies to baby sit regularly. That is not their responsibility and to expect it is kinda pushy


Yes, you need a nanny or solid set of reliable sitters. This is hard. And your kid is only 3.

Especially if your job isn’t a typical 9/5. Does the hospital have options/services/suggestions?
Anonymous
I'd look at an apartment along Connecticut between Van Ness and Cleveland Park. Family friendly yet accessible to downtown via metro and bus lines, direct bus lines to WHC that get you there in less than 30 minutes, etc. Good daycare options nearby (eg. Communikids) and zoned for good schools. You'll be near libraries, parks, transportation, you g families and single people if you do decide to date.
Anonymous
You need a nanny. Your schedule is too irregular. So find a good professional nanny through an agency who is willing to do some nights and weekends for a doctors schedule. Don’t mess with before and after care. Try White House Nannies. Look for an apartment building near a playground and a library that the nanny can walk to with a decent commute for you. Maybe takoma park. You will likely be driving at least some due to your schedule if you are doing late shifts. Ask some of your future colleagues how they commute. You can do part time pre school or just skip it all together and have the nanny do playgroups. Pre k is not going to work as childcare for your schedule. Good luck.

Anonymous
Agree with the above -- it will be stressful for everyone to rely on other families to fill in childcare gaps. PK3 is not going to cover your work schedule.

I think an Au Pair or nanny might be a good fit for this situation, particularly an au pair if you need overnight coverage a third of the time. We live in Bloomingdale and I know several families with docs at WHC and who use Au Pairs. It's a good neighborhood for your commute, by the way.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think your bigger issue is after before 7am / after 6:30 pm / weekends / overnights. Have you considered an au pair for pick up and drop off and extra support?

Welcome to DC!


This, OP. I don't think you can rely on other families for "off hours" care. Maybe WHC can help you identify some options that others with more unusual schedules use? If not, an extra room for an au pair may be a must.

There is a lot more street crime in Columbia Hts than there used to be and we experienced some incidents at playgrounds before moving west of the park. I'd suggest that. There is a great playground at St. Columba's for little ones and it might be a nice place to connect with other families in addition to whatever school your DD attends, it is a very progressive and friendly place. McLean Gardens would seem to tick a lot of your boxes and there are other apt options in the Wisconsin corridor. Traffic is less than pre-covid and a lot of your commute times would be off peak. If you want to take public transit, the H2/H4 bus runs from Tenleytown to WHC and takes about 30 minutes.

Re: safety, get data here https://crimecards.dc.gov/
Anonymous
I won’t be able to do an au pair because my understanding is you need to be a US citizen or permanent resident to have one in DC, which I’m not. And didn’t mean to imply I’d depend on other families for care, I certainly would be looking for nannies/babysitters (have already started on care.com).

Any reason why doing preK and supplementing with nanny wouldn’t work?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I won’t be able to do an au pair because my understanding is you need to be a US citizen or permanent resident to have one in DC, which I’m not. And didn’t mean to imply I’d depend on other families for care, I certainly would be looking for nannies/babysitters (have already started on care.com).

Any reason why doing preK and supplementing with nanny wouldn’t work?


Nanny is fine! Hope you find someone great. Friends have had good luck with the Nannu forum on this site.

I wouldn't live in Columbia Heights, and I have a somewhat high tolerance for crime. I live in Shaw. Look at Bloomingdale, or Mount Pleasant for short commutes with lots of families. Go West of the Park if you want to really feel safe -- the suggestion of looking at the apartments on Connecticut was good.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I won’t be able to do an au pair because my understanding is you need to be a US citizen or permanent resident to have one in DC, which I’m not. And didn’t mean to imply I’d depend on other families for care, I certainly would be looking for nannies/babysitters (have already started on care.com).

Any reason why doing preK and supplementing with nanny wouldn’t work?


I think you are going to have some difficulty finding a nanny who will work overnights.

You might have more luck if you look for someone live in. But if you do that you might find that you can get a 3 bedroom 2 bath place (the minimum you can do with a live in) plus daycare in Silver Spring or Hyattsville plus daycare, for less than a 3 bedroom 2 bath place in DC with free PreK, aftercare, and camp.

Daycare is going to give your kid much more stability. PreK would mean transitioning to aftercare, and then to a nanny, plus needing to make different arrangements for all the school breaks, or paying your nanny a ton of over time to make those work.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'd look at an apartment along Connecticut between Van Ness and Cleveland Park. Family friendly yet accessible to downtown via metro and bus lines, direct bus lines to WHC that get you there in less than 30 minutes, etc. Good daycare options nearby (eg. Communikids) and zoned for good schools. You'll be near libraries, parks, transportation, you g families and single people if you do decide to date.


Agree to look on the H2/H4 bus routes, wmata.com so, in bounds for Janney and Murch. I don't think Eaton will be as convenient if you want to take a bus to work. If you are driving won't matter as much. If you need an au pair, I'd try to rent a small house. There are not as many 3 br apartments.

I think you are going to need 2 childcare options, one for daytime shifts for before preK 4 and one for "off hours." Many do use au pairs to get that flexibility, ask WHC if they have any other options. I'd start west of the park and in bounds for a school that will be a good fit for elementary and beyond if you stay. Moving is disruptive, expensive and you will have connected with kids & families, start as you mean to go on. East of the park is not going to get you so many benefits that it would outweigh a subsequent move.

You can't rely on other families to be regular childcare. Solve that piece and that will decide how many bedrooms you need and go from there.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I won’t be able to do an au pair because my understanding is you need to be a US citizen or permanent resident to have one in DC, which I’m not. And didn’t mean to imply I’d depend on other families for care, I certainly would be looking for nannies/babysitters (have already started on care.com).

Any reason why doing preK and supplementing with nanny wouldn’t work?


I think you are going to have some difficulty finding a nanny who will work overnights.

You might have more luck if you look for someone live in. But if you do that you might find that you can get a 3 bedroom 2 bath place (the minimum you can do with a live in) plus daycare in Silver Spring or Hyattsville plus daycare, for less than a 3 bedroom 2 bath place in DC with free PreK, aftercare, and camp.

Daycare is going to give your kid much more stability. PreK would mean transitioning to aftercare, and then to a nanny, plus needing to make different arrangements for all the school breaks, or paying your nanny a ton of over time to make those work.


Running these numbers makes sense, OP. Perhaps you could get a live in student with low rent in exchange for childcare for the overnights? Daycare does make a lot of sense for the continuity throughout the year. I'd ask WHC what others do with similar schedules, there may be options we don't know about.
Anonymous
With that schedule you need to accept that you have to hire a FT nanny who can workk whatever hours you are scheduled for. You cannot expect someone to take a PT job but also be available to work over night 1/3 of the time. But you probably can find a nanny who will agree to a fixed schedule of 40-50 hours a week whenever you need them. You’re not going to be able to rely on “free PK” and a PT nanny with your schedule. Remember that you are the sole wage earner and you need to invest in ensuring you can work. So yes; you will pay 1/2 your income on childcare. The other alternative is overnight daycares that cater to shift workers/medical professionals, but that seems rough.

You can still send your child to “free” PK with a fulltime nanny - you’d just use the nanny hours at different times of the day/week, or see if she’d do light housework and cooking while DD is at school.

But you need 100% paid coverage for when you work.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I won’t be able to do an au pair because my understanding is you need to be a US citizen or permanent resident to have one in DC, which I’m not. And didn’t mean to imply I’d depend on other families for care, I certainly would be looking for nannies/babysitters (have already started on care.com).

Any reason why doing preK and supplementing with nanny wouldn’t work?



The problem with "supplementing" with a nanny with your unusual hours is that you cant reasonably assume that this person will be able to find other part time work that fits in the inverse of your schedule, and they won't be able to survive on part time hours. You need to accept that you will have to pay for someone full time. I'm sure you can find 40 hours of work for her, even if you child is in PK. Look closely at the school year schedule (180 days per year) and your work schedule.

I'm very sorry that your child's mother isn't involved in childcare! The other option is bringing up a grandparent for that third of the month for overnights, which will be the trickiest thing to cover. Might be cheaper to fly in a grandparent than hire full time help.
Anonymous
Columbia Heights is so convenient with little kids. Walk to everything including Target and the pediatrician. It also probably a greater concentration of families than any other neighborhood. I would look at adding Raymond ES to your lottery list (north CH) as well as getting on the list for the free PK at CentroNia and Barbara Chambers.
Anonymous
Did you put Whittier on your lottery list?
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