Dating divorced men in their fifties

[Anonymous]

The biggest issue with men in their 50s is their life. I am 55 and very fit. But I am an exception all my friends my age married or single have a host of health issues due to a sedentary lifestyle. I am sorry but if you are not fit and/or in good health in your 50s it will be very challenging to juggle multiple things. And women are passionate. They are not going to waste time with a man who just wants to stay home or do quick basic dates lol. No with women you need both mental and physical energy to keep up. This last part a lot of underestimate it. And also at that age a woman will start hedging bet thinking whether you are a man she may be stuck taking care of after his stroke or some other illness.

[Anonymous]

In any particular two week period, I might not have time. Over two months, I almost always have some time.

Almost every time a woman went more than three weeks without having time to see me, she turned out to be seeing someone else and just not telling me about it because she wanted me as a backup. The same is probably true for most people, myself included.

I'm over 50 professional male.

[Anonymous]

The newly divorced friend wants a surrogate husband and thinks dating should be how it was in her 20s.

She needs to get over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The newly divorced friend wants a surrogate husband and thinks dating should be how it was in her 20s.

She needs to get over it.

A good option could be also just staying single and keep dating until she finds the right fit. It’s not a bad option for someone with established lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In any particular two week period, I might not have time. Over two months, I almost always have some time.

Almost every time a woman went more than three weeks without having time to see me, she turned out to be seeing someone else and just not telling me about it because she wanted me as a backup. The same is probably true for most people, myself included.

I'm over 50 professional male.

That’s not true for me - I might just prefer taking a break and being single with my vibrator. I have a child, elderly parents, friends and my time is very valuable to waste it on formalistic short dates

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The newly divorced friend wants a surrogate husband and thinks dating should be how it was in her 20s.

She needs to get over it.

A lot of them divorced because they thought they were hot stuff, many cheaters. They find their “status” is much different when they aren’t just a no-strings AP. They can’t find men close to that caliber that would be interested in them single, including the guys that had no problem using them for a bang when both married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The newly divorced friend wants a surrogate husband and thinks dating should be how it was in her 20s.

She needs to get over it.

A good option could be also just staying single and keep dating until she finds the right fit. It’s not a bad option for someone with established lifestyle.

Not every adult dating in their 40s or 50s is auditioning for the role of your new spouse. They have work, family obligations which could include young adults and aging parents, social and health interests. Frankly, I find someone too available to not be all that interesting. And sometimes people want fun partners to have dinner with, go hear live music, go on hikes together, that sort of thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he is into you he will see you.

+1 doesn't matter how busy, he'll make time. But, if he likes you but not over the moon, then he's going to slot you in somewhere when he has time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The newly divorced friend wants a surrogate husband and thinks dating should be how it was in her 20s.

She needs to get over it.

A good option could be also just staying single and keep dating until she finds the right fit. It’s not a bad option for someone with established lifestyle.

Not every adult dating in their 40s or 50s is auditioning for the role of your new spouse. They have work, family obligations which could include young adults and aging parents, social and health interests. Frankly, I find someone too available to not be all that interesting. And sometimes people want fun partners to have dinner with, go hear live music, go on hikes together, that sort of thing.

It doesn’t sound that this guy can even offer fun dates.
I’ve met men who were attractive, well-off but extremely lazy daters. Other men really put an effort if they like a woman. I always go with type 2: even if a woman is in her 40-50s, she can still find someone for whom she will be special.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he is into you he will see you.

+1 doesn't matter how busy, he'll make time. But, if he likes you but not over the moon, then he's going to slot you in somewhere when he has time.

Some men are just not into women that much. They just slot whoever they see into their free time, no matter how old, attractive, fun the woman is. It’s these men’s shallow relationships dating style, as it’s the easiest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women are always looking for a reason to say "no".

Men that age with good jobs always have options so unless your friend is a 25 year old bikini model, an older man is going to live his life and fit the 50 year old woman in when convenient.

Feeling seconded and not being desired kills it for me. Last minute scheduling, formalistic texts etc. It’s called bread-crumbing dating style, really affects woman’s self esteem.
I stay single and don’t engage in these flings until I meet someone who makes me feel special. I would rather date a journalist who makes me feel that way, than a law partner who fits me in after all 25 year olds

Do you mean “formulaic?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women are always looking for a reason to say "no".

Men that age with good jobs always have options so unless your friend is a 25 year old bikini model, an older man is going to live his life and fit the 50 year old woman in when convenient.

Feeling seconded and not being desired kills it for me. Last minute scheduling, formalistic texts etc. It’s called bread-crumbing dating style, really affects woman’s self esteem.
I stay single and don’t engage in these flings until I meet someone who makes me feel special. I would rather date a journalist who makes me feel that way, than a law partner who fits me in after all 25 year olds

Do you mean “formulaic?”

I meant lacking substance- could be both formulaic and formalistic. Just to text her something to fill the air

[Anonymous]

Does your friend not work outside the home? What job did her ex husband have? I’m finding it hard to understand how “I’m busy at work” is a foreign concept to her, especially in the DC area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he is into you he will see you.

+1 doesn't matter how busy, he'll make time. But, if he likes you but not over the moon, then he's going to slot you in somewhere when he has time.

Some men are just not into women that much. They just slot whoever they see into their free time, no matter how old, attractive, fun the woman is. It’s these men’s shallow relationships dating style, as it’s the easiest.

It’s dating, so…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he is into you he will see you.

Yup, I agree. "If they want to, they will" is equally applicable to both sexes.