We are broke

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Sell house and move to more affordable area.
2. Whether you move or not, look at USAJOBS for a remote government job where you don’t have to go to an office. Ask whether they have flexible hours such that as long as you work an 8 hr day they don’t care when during the day/night you work or whether your day is broken up. You may have to start out low —GS-5 — but try to get a ladder job where you move up a GS level every year.

This is horrible advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the feedback. The ring was $50k new over 20 years ago. No idea what it’s worth now. I was hoping for $20k but maybe that’s optimistic. We live in a small old house in a desirable close-in suburb. I do the cleaning and the yard work myself. We drive old cars and don’t take vacations. 4 kids. Oldest is 7. I think most assume we’re the smart, frugal types. When, in actuality, we’re just barely making ends meet these days. It wasn’t always this way. We had an incredibly difficult year. Our current after-school activities are cheap, nothing fancy. Christmas is going to be very different.

I will not pull my kid out of preschool. Routine and socialization are extremely important. I’ll get back to work asap. Spent all morning working on my resume and applications. Thanks for the encouragement.

I don’t think you’ll get $20K for it. I do think you should drop private school. Families with lots of kids get very few extras, such as new clothes or activities - I don’t know any who did anything other than non-Catholic school (and they all wound up in low paying jobs with a ton of kids themselves, so public school would have made no difference there). I think only one kid can be doing an activity at a time.

[Anonymous]

What is current HHI?

[Anonymous]

I would end the prek to save money and bring in one or two children to care for into your home. You would save the prek cost and bring in some money. You can create the dependable routine and socialization you child needs.

[Anonymous]

I haven’t read the whole thread but trying to understand how or who or why you could have a 20k engagement ring when you apparently aren’t wealthy. Mine was less than a tenth of that!!

I guess this explains why so many Americans are in deep financial trouble.

But yes, sell the ring. Even if you can’t recover the full cost. You can’t afford that ring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven’t read the whole thread but trying to understand how or who or why you could have a 20k engagement ring when you apparently aren’t wealthy. Mine was less than a tenth of that!!

I guess this explains why so many Americans are in deep financial trouble.

But yes, sell the ring. Even if you can’t recover the full cost. You can’t afford that ring.

It’s actually a $50k ring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the feedback. The ring was $50k new over 20 years ago. No idea what it’s worth now. I was hoping for $20k but maybe that’s optimistic. We live in a small old house in a desirable close-in suburb. I do the cleaning and the yard work myself. We drive old cars and don’t take vacations. 4 kids. Oldest is 7. I think most assume we’re the smart, frugal types. When, in actuality, we’re just barely making ends meet these days. It wasn’t always this way. We had an incredibly difficult year. Our current after-school activities are cheap, nothing fancy. Christmas is going to be very different.

I will not pull my kid out of preschool. Routine and socialization are extremely important. I’ll get back to work asap. Spent all morning working on my resume and applications. Thanks for the encouragement.

You could afford to spend $50k on a ring 20 years ago but are broke today?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the feedback. The ring was $50k new over 20 years ago. No idea what it’s worth now. I was hoping for $20k but maybe that’s optimistic. We live in a small old house in a desirable close-in suburb. I do the cleaning and the yard work myself. We drive old cars and don’t take vacations. 4 kids. Oldest is 7. I think most assume we’re the smart, frugal types. When, in actuality, we’re just barely making ends meet these days. It wasn’t always this way. We had an incredibly difficult year. Our current after-school activities are cheap, nothing fancy. Christmas is going to be very different.

I will not pull my kid out of preschool. Routine and socialization are extremely important. I’ll get back to work asap. Spent all morning working on my resume and applications. Thanks for the encouragement.

You could afford to spend $50k on a ring 20 years ago but are broke today?

Four kids on one income will do that to a family’s financial situation. OP is educated and their family is probably one of the over-educated, underpaid types prevalent in DC. There have been many threads about people who are under-earrning relative to their potential. Throw in more than one kid and you have what OP is dealing with. I”m guessing OP and her DH grew up UMC, hence the expensive ring and close-in suburb. OP sounds like a smart lady and they will pull out of this temporary downturn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for your struggle but no one can give you any meaningful advice based on what you told us. Other than the fact you need money, there's no useful info.

Stfu

[Anonymous]

Get your youngest into public preschool/pre-K next year so they are on the same schedule as your elementary schools aged kids. Then you can work or sub at the school.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry you've had a bad year OP. I had a similar situation a few years ago. A few things that I didn't see mentioned:

- I made a lot more than expected selling things we didn't need on Facebook marketplace

- DH and I charged scooters at night

- I did Amazon Flex delivery

- I looked into tutoring kids in China because the hours were better, but I did not end up doing it

- I made some surprisingly good money participating in market research with dscout

- We scaled back to 1 car

- I did a preschool coop which was ridiculously cheap and I just had to help for a few hours about twice a month

- Have not done this yet, but plan to switch to Mint Mobile. It is much cheaper than most phone plans and gets good reviews.

Good luck OP. Remember this is temporary; you'll get through this. We paid out over $100k in debt and drastically improved our cash flow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for your struggle but no one can give you any meaningful advice based on what you told us. Other than the fact you need money, there's no useful info.

Stfu

Oh, you’re a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get an adjunct job for evenings at a local college. It’s not a great salary, but it’s very flexible and you can do it after your partner returns from work or while the kids are in preschool. Do that until they are all in school and then move to full time work.

That pays next to nothing, and OP probably isn’t qualified anyway.

Not a great salary, but the adjuncts i know make anywhere from $35-50/ hour with part time evening hours. Establishing a tutoring business takes time. Plus people want hours from 3-6 for tutoring snd she’ll have to hire a babysitter. She either needs to go back to work full time though, prob as a teacher.

Even if she can get $35 (since she doesn’t appear to have any adjunct teaching experience), if she gets two course sections that’s likely 6 hours a week, so about $210 a week pre-tax.

Do you know how much grading and prep there is? She would make more at Starbucks hourly.

[Anonymous]

Your kid does not need daycare or preschool. You have your own other children for socialization. Drop that cost ASAP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re on one income. We have little kids, including one with special needs. No local family. No help. Money has always been tight. But this year wrecked us. Unexpected home repairs (in addition to the expected home repairs), medical bills, and a family emergency depleted our savings and left us with credit card debt and a heloc. I’ve been reading Dave Ramsey’s book and it’s hard not to feel completely hopeless. There are more home repairs that need to be done. I’d love to work but I need good, reliable childcare which is $$$. All the kids are in school but not all at the same school. There are therapies to get to and after-school activities. It feels like somebody is always sick too. I just feel so stuck.

I’m considering selling my engagement ring and using the $ to get an au pair so I can go back to work while still having somebody around the house all the time. Also considering selling the house and moving somewhere else. Last thought was to pull money from somewhere - $401k?

Even if you just work retail/bank teller from 9-3 while the kids are in school, that would be more money than you have now. Start there.

I think you overestimate the reliability of having a part time job that fill all the kids' in-school hours. I have only been able to do spotty freelance. Especially when you are starting out because you can't take off when anyone (including yourself) is sick.

Freelance is different bc you are trying to build a name for yourself or a client base. Retail you just don’t go and if you get fired, you move to the next store and start there. Even if she only works two weeks before she gets fired for having a sick kid, that is $200 extra. It won’t change her life but, done a few times when she is able, it could be enough to draw the worst of the sting.

Yeah but you can't just show up to a retail job and say "hey I can only be on the schedule 10-2." They give you the schedule. You are not in charge.

You CAN in this market and it's absolutely worth a shot.