Are there any men out there that aren't interested in having children?
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Anonymous
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I'm in my mid 30s and have a very bad endo. By the time I turned 30 my ovaries and uterus were so badly scarred by surgeries that the doctors told me I'm unlikely to have a natural pregnancy.
The psychological toll of my illness was so bad that I have no energy to manage yet another medical challenge: trying to get pregnant. I began dating someone in my 30s that was well aware of my situation but in the last minute he flipped the switch and tried to convince me that we should do IVF. At some point he even called me selfish for neglecting his feelings. I ended the relationship, and I just want companionship from a guy that's not interested in children. My family says I'm limiting myself by not considering IVF or other methods, but I honestly don't want to go through any other procedure. |
Anonymous
| It's a biological drive, but yes there are plenty of men out there who don't want kids. |
Anonymous
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Probably
But even if they do have children, they don’t grow or change much to meet the new needs and demands. |
Anonymous
| There are - I have several friends who are childless by choice so neither they nor their husbands ever wanted children. I'm sorry for what you've gone through. |
Anonymous
| Date someone who already has kids and doesn't want any more. |
Anonymous
| Would you be open to adoption? That might be another path towards motherhood that doesnt involve any medical procedure. |
Anonymous
OP here Adoption is emotionally draining and can be extremely expensive, not to mention that many kids that are up for adoption also have special needs. At this point in my life I just want to relax, spend time travelling and exploring different hobbies. |
Anonymous
| Yes, plenty if them, DH is one of them and I have a bunch of friends who found them too. |
Anonymous
| Yes, a lot of men don’t want children. I met quite a few men in their 30s and 40s who don’t have children and are certain that they don’t want any. One guy is only 31 but he said he’s known since high school that he doesn’t want children. Another guy is 36 and seriously considers having a vasectomy. Another one is 37 and said that he doesn’t mind if his girlfriend/wife has children from her previous relationship but he doesn’t want any kids of his own because it’s too late - kids are expensive, and he wants to retire early. Two other guys have nephews and see how challenging it is to raise kids and don’t want to ever complicate their own lives in such a way. |
Anonymous
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Yes. |
Anonymous
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There are men out there that aren't interested in children but not many of them. Not wanting children can limit your pool a lot.
I understand how hard it is for you right now but I'd try having at least one if I were in your place. Children are amazing and will compensate for whatever difficulty you might be having at the moment. Don't deny yourself such a beautiful experience. |
Anonymous
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Most of the 30-something men I’ve dated don’t really want kids, it’s more of a “I’d have them if my partner wanted them”.
I think very, very few men actually want kids the way many women do. So you should be able to find someone. |
Anonymous
This is so, so incorrect. |
Anonymous
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Sounds like your ex was just a jerk.
I have a friend who she and her husband wanted kids but it didn't work out for them (she had severe endo and had multiple ectopic pregnancies). He didn't leave. |
Anonymous
| This is where online dating is helpful. You can be upfront about what you want |