If DH just informed wants divorce…

[Anonymous]

What will happen with child custody this summer with our 2 young kids (7 and 4)? DH has not filed yet. We are both finding attorneys. He plans to move out of state and wants to take them with him for a long period this summer. Sounds crazy to me and not good for our kids.

What will happen and what do I need to do?

(Yes, I am finding an attorney and googling around, but if anyone has experience with this I’d appreciate your feedback. Thanks.)

[Anonymous]

do not let him take them out of state at least not without a legal plan worked out. he is trying to force you to move to that state by relocating them. you need an attorney, NOW.

[Anonymous]

No, if he takes them he can enroll them in school and claim that is their state of residence and you either have to move or give up custody.

[Anonymous]

I am sorry I do not have any advice for you but I just wanted to express my full sympathy for your situation.

I guess it depends on your state, but I don’t think he can legally take your two children to another state w/o your explicit consent.

[Anonymous]

Seems odd. Has he taken the kids out of state solo before?

Best of luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry I do not have any advice for you but I just wanted to express my full sympathy for your situation.

I guess it depends on your state, but I don’t think he can legally take your two children to another state w/o your explicit consent.

In my state, unless you have a custody order that prevents moving the kids, there's an assumption that a parent has custody and can travel with their kids. So, you want to file that emergency custody order that specifically states that the kids can't travel or can't travel for more than a certain number of days. That should be the first thing your attorney addresses.

[Anonymous]

Do not let him take them out of state!! Get an attorney today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What will happen with child custody this summer with our 2 young kids (7 and 4)? DH has not filed yet. We are both finding attorneys. He plans to move out of state and wants to take them with him for a long period this summer. Sounds crazy to me and not good for our kids.

What will happen and what do I need to do?

(Yes, I am finding an attorney and googling around, but if anyone has experience with this I’d appreciate your feedback. Thanks.)

Sounds like you may have a very busy summer with lots of solo child care ahead of you. I'd put any plans to go to Vegas on an indefinite hold if I were you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry I do not have any advice for you but I just wanted to express my full sympathy for your situation.

I guess it depends on your state, but I don’t think he can legally take your two children to another state w/o your explicit consent.

Currently, he can go anywhere he wants with the children. As can she. Unless a court issues an order to the contrary. OP, before you start burning all your money up on an endless court battle, please try to think strategically. There are endless threads on here of women bemoaning the father's failure to look after the children. You are having this freedom offered up to you in a silver platter. Stop making decisions based on the notion that anything your husband dies is automatically bad for you. Unless this husband is a foreign national and you think he will try to flee the country, you have nothing to worry about. There is an interstate child custody compact which most states use to address multi jurisdictional custody disputes of it comes to that. Slow down and enjoy your extended summer vacation without the kids. Isn't this the break every feminist claims they want?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry I do not have any advice for you but I just wanted to express my full sympathy for your situation.

I guess it depends on your state, but I don’t think he can legally take your two children to another state w/o your explicit consent.

In my state, unless you have a custody order that prevents moving the kids, there's an assumption that a parent has custody and can travel with their kids. So, you want to file that emergency custody order that specifically states that the kids can't travel or can't travel for more than a certain number of days. That should be the first thing your attorney addresses.

This. You need to.file immediately or he could force proceedings in his new state.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry I do not have any advice for you but I just wanted to express my full sympathy for your situation.

I guess it depends on your state, but I don’t think he can legally take your two children to another state w/o your explicit consent.

Currently, he can go anywhere he wants with the children. As can she. Unless a court issues an order to the contrary. OP, before you start burning all your money up on an endless court battle, please try to think strategically. There are endless threads on here of women bemoaning the father's failure to look after the children. You are having this freedom offered up to you in a silver platter. Stop making decisions based on the notion that anything your husband dies is automatically bad for you. Unless this husband is a foreign national and you think he will try to flee the country, you have nothing to worry about. There is an interstate child custody compact which most states use to address multi jurisdictional custody disputes of it comes to that. Slow down and enjoy your extended summer vacation without the kids. Isn't this the break every feminist claims they want?

Yeah … no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What will happen with child custody this summer with our 2 young kids (7 and 4)? DH has not filed yet. We are both finding attorneys. He plans to move out of state and wants to take them with him for a long period this summer. Sounds crazy to me and not good for our kids.

What will happen and what do I need to do?

(Yes, I am finding an attorney and googling around, but if anyone has experience with this I’d appreciate your feedback. Thanks.)

Sounds like you may have a very busy summer with lots of solo child care ahead of you. I'd put any plans to go to Vegas on an indefinite hold if I were you.

What is wring with you? Deal with your mental health and stop spewing nonsense on here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:do not let him take them out of state at least not without a legal plan worked out. he is trying to force you to move to that state by relocating them. you need an attorney, NOW.

Agree.

Find a therapist or divorce coach as well
To help you process the feelings and keep them separate from the legal process, which is built on bad faith.

Men spend years on their marriage suppressing their feelings to “keep the peace” only for it to turn into resentment and rage that they then feel justified in acting on during the divorce process, using the kids as pawns.

The key is too stay smart and firm, and resist the urge to escalate. At least where I am there’s a lot of baiting. Remember the lawyers, etc benefit from the conflict.

[Anonymous]

You can jointly hire a mediator who will write up a parenting agreement. How your DH responds and how that process goes will likely indicate how you can move forward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry I do not have any advice for you but I just wanted to express my full sympathy for your situation.

I guess it depends on your state, but I don’t think he can legally take your two children to another state w/o your explicit consent.

In my state, unless you have a custody order that prevents moving the kids, there's an assumption that a parent has custody and can travel with their kids. So, you want to file that emergency custody order that specifically states that the kids can't travel or can't travel for more than a certain number of days. That should be the first thing your attorney addresses.

This. You need to.file immediately or he could force proceedings in his new state.

+1 to this. Consult with a lawyer, but he very likely has the right to take the kids wherever he wants if there's nothing in place to forbid him to do so.