WWYD - man picked over me to speak at a women's conference

[Anonymous]

I shouldn't be, but I'm really mad that I applied to be a speaker at a women's conference for my industry (very niche, very tech bro populated). Almost the exact same talk topic they picked a dude to speak instead of me (or presumably other women). Like WTF? The dude isn't even well known. I don't know how they justify speaking a male speaker when it's supposed to be just women and people that identify as women.

I wish I could email the organizer but what's the point?

[Anonymous]

Diversity. They already have enough women speakers on the schedule probably.

[Anonymous]

Ask the organizer if they could explain their desire to have a man speak at a woman's conference. Even better, get a colleague of yours to ask. That way you won't look as butthurt as you are.

[Anonymous]

Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Diversity. They already have enough women speakers on the schedule probably.

There are several of the conferences in different geographies and men have not been picked to speak, ever. This conference makes it very clear that this isn't an event for men and they are not welcome (again, this field is very tech bro populated).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

Yes, of course. I just find it really upsetting and want to give that feedback without the blow back on me specifically

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Diversity. They already have enough women speakers on the schedule probably.

Nope. If I’m going to a women’s conference that’s who I want to hear from. I’m tired of this BS.

DP.

[Anonymous]

I’m pp and I’ve emailed conferences with lack of diversity to say I’m not going. I’d do the same with this if it was in my industry. Can you let influencers know and put the conference on blast?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

Yes, of course. I just find it really upsetting and want to give that feedback without the blow back on me specifically

You find it upsetting? Seriously?

Try being a better person.

This guy is taking time out of his day to talk to a bunch of women, some of whom clearly hate him for existing.

Oh, but you don’t want your views to “blow back” on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

Yes, of course. I just find it really upsetting and want to give that feedback without the blow back on me specifically

You find it upsetting? Seriously?

Try being a better person.

This guy is taking time out of his day to talk to a bunch of women, some of whom clearly hate him for existing.

Oh, but you don’t want your views to “blow back” on you.

He's getting paid. But also the website is very clear that men are not welcome unless they are a sponsor. He's not sponsoring the conference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

Yes, of course. I just find it really upsetting and want to give that feedback without the blow back on me specifically

You find it upsetting? Seriously?

Try being a better person.

This guy is taking time out of his day to talk to a bunch of women, some of whom clearly hate him for existing.

Oh, but you don’t want your views to “blow back” on you.

He's getting paid. But also the website is very clear that men are not welcome unless they are a sponsor. He's not sponsoring the conference.

Oh, so now you want to deprive him of employment that you think you are entitled to… cool.

I am glad that after all these years of “progress” we can stop pretending it was about principles or any other high minded mumbo jumbo.

I find myself admiring the guy for putting himself out there actually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

Yes, of course. I just find it really upsetting and want to give that feedback without the blow back on me specifically

You find it upsetting? Seriously?

Try being a better person.

This guy is taking time out of his day to talk to a bunch of women, some of whom clearly hate him for existing.

Oh, but you don’t want your views to “blow back” on you.

He's getting paid. But also the website is very clear that men are not welcome unless they are a sponsor. He's not sponsoring the conference.

Oh, so now you want to deprive him of employment that you think you are entitled to… cool.

I am glad that after all these years of “progress” we can stop pretending it was about principles or any other high minded mumbo jumbo.

I find myself admiring the guy for putting himself out there actually.

He's supposedly a successful business owner so, no, not depriving him of anything in a space dominated by men. Which is why there are carve outs for women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the other speaker was chosen and announced already. You are not going to get picked at this point.

You can politely offer yourself as a speaker in the future or if other spots become available, but going and whining about not being chosen at this stage would be unproductive.

Yes, of course. I just find it really upsetting and want to give that feedback without the blow back on me specifically

You find it upsetting? Seriously?

Try being a better person.

This guy is taking time out of his day to talk to a bunch of women, some of whom clearly hate him for existing.

Oh, but you don’t want your views to “blow back” on you.

He's getting paid. But also the website is very clear that men are not welcome unless they are a sponsor. He's not sponsoring the conference.

DP and you lost me at “not welcome.”

I wouldn’t attend any event that’s exclusionary.

- a woman

[Anonymous]

I think this is a troll. I’ve never heard of applying to speak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I shouldn't be, but I'm really mad that I applied to be a speaker at a women's conference for my industry (very niche, very tech bro populated). Almost the exact same talk topic they picked a dude to speak instead of me (or presumably other women). Like WTF? The dude isn't even well known. I don't know how they justify speaking a male speaker when it's supposed to be just women and people that identify as women.

I wish I could email the organizer but what's the point?

Maybe he identifies as a woman. Check your privilege.