Getting kids interested in more than YT and video games?

[Anonymous]

14 and 12 yrs old would spend the whole weekend on YouTube and video games if I let them. They reject every activity I suggest, and if I insist, they get moody, it's exhausting.

Yesterday, after a lot of resistance, we went to the zoo, a cool bakery, and Five Below (their choice). At home I suggested a movie; they refused until I asked for just 15 minutes then we watched the whole thing. They were rolling laughing.

Today I planned a short nature walk, another bakery, and an activity of their choice, but the complaining started again. I told them I’m going and they can stay home but no electronics. They access to a phone for calls (no internet).

Is this what I’m in for the next few years? Are there ways I can interest them without all the hassle? It’s so draining.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:14 and 12 yrs old would spend the whole weekend on YouTube and video games if I let them. They reject every activity I suggest, and if I insist, they get moody, it's exhausting.

Yesterday, after a lot of resistance, we went to the zoo, a cool bakery, and Five Below (their choice). At home I suggested a movie; they refused until I asked for just 15 minutes then we watched the whole thing. They were rolling laughing.

Today I planned a short nature walk, another bakery, and an activity of their choice, but the complaining started again. I told them I’m going and they can stay home but no electronics. They access to a phone for calls (no internet).

Is this what I’m in for the next few years? Are there ways I can interest them without all the hassle? It’s so draining.

so I'm older than your kids but I'd also spend all weekend playing video games/on youtube if my mom let me. you just have to plan activities, but also give them chill time to like enjoy their own things. for example my mom takes me out to watch movies or go outside or whatever, but she also gives me plenty of time to be alone, which I do very much appreciate. kids don't like when they feel *forced* to do something

[Anonymous]

Limit the screens, you don't have to get rid of them completely. Have them do some of thr family activities, but, also, let them get bored. They'll have to entertain themselves without screens.

[Anonymous]

I’d suggest maybe one “big” activity a day, and then let them have downtime (and screens) after that, instead of trying to fill the entire day and evening.

Are they in any activities? My kids, at that age, had club sports and weekends were often filled with tournaments. But that’s a way to keep them off screens!

[Anonymous]

Get rid of internet and video games. Give them other traditional toys to play with instead.

You caused this.

[Anonymous]

My kids definitely complain like yours, but what seems to work best is giving them a choice and having a set amount of time. So, for instance, “you have 2 hours to play on the computer. Do you want to do it before we go on an adventure, or after? Or do you want to split it up.”

Also- let them plan the family adventure. Tell them they get to decide what/where, but it can’t include video games/you tube. See what they come up with sometimes

[Anonymous]

They need hard limits on the electronics, and to get bored and find ways to amuse themselves in addition to suggestions from you. I think it's good to require a daily walk, bike ride or visit to the gym as well. I started this one summer and my son kept it up without reminders after a couple weeks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of internet and video games. Give them other traditional toys to play with instead.

You caused this.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of internet and video games. Give them other traditional toys to play with instead.

You caused this.

+1

"Traditional toys" for 14 and 12 year old

[Anonymous]

You have to be a parent and take away YouTube and video games. That’s the only way.

[Anonymous]

My daughter is like this. 12. We limit screens to almost nothing. She has a phone with no internet and ten minute time limits on games (maybe three games on it - so 30 minutes a day total of lame games like township or wordscape). She loves music but spotify has tok tok reels so we gave her cds and im looking for another streaming service of music only.

She still resists leaving the house but is reading books now - not good books but i dont care. She spends a lot of time in her room listening to music and daydreaming.

We do give screen time for doing homework. Usually 10 minutes for each assignment though right now i am bribing her with 30 minutes for doing a hard spanish thing she was freaking out about.

Weve only been at this for about a month, so i am hoping a willibness for fun adventures follows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They need hard limits on the electronics, and to get bored and find ways to amuse themselves in addition to suggestions from you. I think it's good to require a daily walk, bike ride or visit to the gym as well. I started this one summer and my son kept it up without reminders after a couple weeks.

This. I set limits -- 30 minutes of video game time on weekdays and 1 hr on weekends. 1 hr of TV.

Then they get bored and then find creative ways to fill the time. Kids need help with this, because the devices will lure them in. Hard limits really really work (they are set within the device).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of internet and video games. Give them other traditional toys to play with instead.

You caused this.

+1

"Traditional toys" for 14 and 12 year old

Maybe not the 14 year old, but the 12 year old yes. Kids need way less screen time and to just be kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get rid of internet and video games. Give them other traditional toys to play with instead.

You caused this.

What traditional toys would you buy for a 12 and 14yo?
My kid is 13 and not quite like OPs but doesn’t play with toys either.

[Anonymous]

I have a 13yo only DD. Screens are restricted during the week but free rein for the most part on weekends BUT if I say we’re going on a hike or doing something together she doesn’t really argue. I do tell her when she had free time so maybe that helps?
So like today, we did volunteer stuff and churchthis morning. Then she did homework for a couple of hours and has an activity she enjoys from 3-5. I told her if she gets all her homework done and room tidied up before 3 she could do whatever she likes from 5-bedtime. I’ll even let her eat dinner and keep watching her phone if she wants to. She’s been good all day about everything else.