Who / what us truly to blame for the challenges of modern dating?

[Anonymous]

Unrealistic expectations for both? Women being told they don’t need men and can prioritize their careers? Swipe culture?

[Anonymous]

Nostalgia and recency bias. I think dating has always been filled with challenges and unpleasant aspects. But time has a way of softening the edges. Meanwhile, the problems with dating right now are in stark relief - particularly in the view of people going through it.

[Anonymous]

Unrealistic expectations heightened by social media influencers. Porn. Living and socializing virtually instead of actually going to places after work, weekends.

[Anonymous]

What challenges? I’m 40 and have found dating is easier than ever. WAY better than my 20s, when you were basically limited to work and friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unrealistic expectations heightened by social media influencers. Porn. Living and socializing virtually instead of actually going to places after work, weekends.

There are several things but so many of them boil down to this.

What’s making it harder for straight men seeking women: Swipe culture making everything into a controlled environment, inhibiting the social skills and risk-taking involved when asking a woman out in a bar, to a certain extent MeToo culture causing women to assume all men are creeps, social media making women seek unrealistic demands about height and income and superficial things instead of the real men that are around them, instagram filters that make prospective female dates a lot more attractive than they really are and causing disappointment in-person.

What’s making it harder for straight women seeking men: Online culture creating a generation of introverted basement dwellers with no appeal, porn and online subcultures/redpill/PUAs creating a depressing and contradictory dating market where women are expected to be sexually experienced and adventurous but also subservient tradwives and have a nonexistent body count. Basically, fulfill my sexual fantasies but don’t have a body count.

Things that make dating worse for both: Obesity, lack of third spaces, the economy/lack of disposable income to spend on dates, work hours and demands requiring people to hustle and not have enough free time.

We need to go back to a world where people were trim, fit, and naturally attractive in their 20s and 30s, when work let out at 5pm sharp and people could go out in the evenings, and when young people had the time, resources, and energy for in-person communal activities.

[Anonymous]

>>MeToo culture causing women to assume all men are creeps<<

With respect, women were worried about men being creeps well before "MeToo." On account of all of the rapes and sexual assaults that men were committing.

It wasn't the Tweets about the assaults that made women wary. It was the assaults themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unrealistic expectations for both? Women being told they don’t need men and can prioritize their careers? Swipe culture?

Too many options and too much emotional baggage.

[Anonymous]

People are waiting for too long so instead of growing together, they grow apart because changing themselves or each other is difficult once you've set habits. Also grass is greener on the other side syndrome is more intense now than ever, leading to unnecessary breakups and divorces.

[Anonymous]

Mark Zuckerberg caused the fifth mass extinction. THAT face stopped mating.

[Anonymous]

My 24-year-old DD and all of her friends told my wife that they expect guys—in their words, not mine—to be “7666”: a seven-figure income, at least six feet tall, six-pack abs, and six inches in, you know where. What percentage of men actually meet those requirements? Less than 1%, I’d guess. These young women are totally delusional, including my own DD.

[Anonymous]

Female entitlement and unrealistic expectations have destroyed modern dating.

[Anonymous]

Men expecting women to look like models.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 24-year-old DD and all of her friends told my wife that they expect guys—in their words, not mine—to be “7666”: a seven-figure income, at least six feet tall, six-pack abs, and six inches in, you know where. What percentage of men actually meet those requirements? Less than 1%, I’d guess. These young women are totally delusional, including my own DD.

And why would a 7666 man want a shallow gold digger?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 24-year-old DD and all of her friends told my wife that they expect guys—in their words, not mine—to be “7666”: a seven-figure income, at least six feet tall, six-pack abs, and six inches in, you know where. What percentage of men actually meet those requirements? Less than 1%, I’d guess. These young women are totally delusional, including my own DD.

And why would a 7666 man want a shallow gold digger?

I guess because said gold digger is hot. Otherwise they wouldn't be bothering.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What challenges? I’m 40 and have found dating is easier than ever. WAY better than my 20s, when you were basically limited to work and friends.

Yes, I agree completely! I am decent looking and middle aged, and I have a good career. Dating is still sometimes disappointing. I've been rejected and dumped But t I have options and so do the women I date.

Maybe that's the root of the problem OP asked about. Everyone who's desirable has many options. When I was younger, I didn't want to dump women because replacing them was hard. I could go for what felt like forever without a viable partner. Now there are always attractive, athletic and interesting women who are hanging out on the apps and willing to date me. There are plenty of new, smart, athletic and interesting men who want to date them too. You have to be resilient.