Young adult son troubles
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Anonymous
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My 21 yo son has significant special needs - ADHD, PDD, and has been in and out of trouble his whole life. When he was 12 and in therapy I was speaking to DH confidentially assuming the kids were in bed asleep and venting about how I thought the therapist was terrible. I even cursed - using the word “SH#$.” I was so mad that this therapist wasn’t addressing his issues. Well little did I know he had a recorder hidden in the room and had recorded me completely. He took what I said privately to DH and played it back for the therapist to “prove” what an irrational, unreasonable mother I was.
Since then I have always wondered which conversations I have with anybody might be exported. It’s as if I have PTSD from that. Today I had a conversation with my daughter in the car and during dinner my DS mentioned a very private point I only had made to my daughter while alone with her. My daughter and I were puzzled as to how he knew this. DS insisted I had mentioned it to him too during an earlier dinner conversation. I had not. So now I’m paranoid and wondering HOW he could have listened in on my conversation while we were in the car. Could he have done it through the phone somehow? I’m brokenhearted that he could have breached my privacy again. But I have no evidence he actually did besides a history of recording, lying, stealing etc… I don’t know what to think or do… |
Anonymous
| You need a new therapist for yourself, OP. Also talk to your doctor about anxiety meds. |
Anonymous
And what about his behavior…?? |
Anonymous
| You need to check your phone or take it to someone who can. You also need to check all the phones. And check the car for a hidden burner phone or bugs. |
Anonymous
| Hire a private investigator who does IT. Have him sweep your car, check all your phones. Maybe he can find the burner, too if the kid leaves it on. |
Anonymous
| There are devices on Amazon that can sweep for bugs (someone paranoid did this at my AirBNB) |
Anonymous
Mostly kidding but…..how do you know this? |
Anonymous
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Where can I find devices that will find bugs or burners in my car?
I forgot to add - he has a long history of doing bad things - recording me and others - it didn’t stop at age 12. I am not tech savvy at all! |
Anonymous
| How soon till he moves out of your home? |
Anonymous
| He’s not moving out at all and of course dad won’t agree to that. Even I would rather he not move out because he’s not responsible enough. But I want to safeguard my privacy!!! |
Anonymous
| Why are you allowing him to live with you? He is an adult and he is violating your daughter's privacy and your privacy. |
Anonymous
| Is there a dashcam in your car? Some can record voices. |
Anonymous
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Divorce your DH and he can live with the son if he so wishes.
Protect yourself and your daughter |
Anonymous
Right! |
Anonymous
Disagree, any normal person would have the reaction OP is having. This is a normal reaction |