Local sibling celebrate parents birthdays together?

[Anonymous]

Just curious what other people do? DH and his siblings all live within an hour of each other yet they tend to celebrate their parents birthdays as a family. They all get along well and I don’t think scheduling is an issue either. It just seems weird for them to not celebrate together. One of the siblings usually schedules their own time with the parent and leaves the others out. I think that’s why the others just do their own thing. I think they would prefer to do something together but are both pretty laid back, so they don’t push in either direction.

I imagine the best option would be to ask what their parents want and my guess would be that they do something together. Curious what others do.

[Anonymous]

Meant to say they do not celebrate together.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they want time with their parents that's not diluted by others.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know if anyone has kids and if so how old they are, but as a parent of young kids my first reaction is that “within an hour of each other” is not close at all. I realize this is all relative, but these days I find that kind of distance challenging to navigate.

[Anonymous]

Why do you care? Do you want your kids to see their cousins more? Want to get to know your in-laws more? Figure that out and solve for that

[Anonymous]

MYOB. Not your mom.

[Anonymous]

Similar situation- my brother has 2 kids and I have one. We celebrate together but i usually have to organize it. I was annoyed at him not stepping up last spring and did Father’s Day myself… no idea if he even called our dad. I wonder if it’s just too hard to coordinate and that’s why they don’t

[Anonymous]

My parents are now deceased, but we did not celebrate birthdays and Mother’s/Father’s Day together. Holidays, yes.

[Anonymous]

My parents are the opposite. They want us to celebrate together, and it’s so difficult. All of the grandkids have their own calendars. Finding a date means negotiating over who’s going to skip, cancel or move other events.

[Anonymous]

Usually we try to coordinate. If we can't, we just do amour own thing.

[Anonymous]

because it's the only time my brothers pay any special attention to our parents

[Anonymous]

There are a lot of adult relationships in play. They have figured it out, how best to have pleasant gatherings. Likely the parents know the personalities very well, have known their entire lives. That doesn't mean all don't get along, especially how it looks to someone else.

Also, even as adults we want our parent's attention. And we want acknowledgement when we make an effort. Showing up at someone else's house, isn't quite the same recognition of effort.

Not all parents are as particular about what they want or how an event is celebrated. Some older folds may, also, prefer more one-on-one with a smaller group. And more events rather than one big one. Or again, they just go with the flow and let whatever happens, happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MYOB. Not your mom.

We all know you know what's best for everyone, OP. But do try to stay in your own lane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MYOB. Not your mom.

We all know you know what's best for everyone, OP. But do try to stay in your own lane.

Says the person who goes online to comment on strangers' families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Usually we try to coordinate. If we can't, we just do amour own thing.

Same, We try for date when majority can make it. Those that can’t, figure out on own.