ADHD criteria "talks excessively"- what does it mean?

[Anonymous]

Does anyone have any insight on what amount of talking from a kid is considered "talking excessively" to the extent it would "count" toward the ADHD diagnosis? Anything you can share that you were told/asked during the process of your kid getting diagnosed?

[Anonymous]

As the parent of a child with ADHD where this is one of the biggest symptoms, I can only say, if you have to ask, then they're probably fine!

I'll be trying to leave his room and he will be following me, talking, even as I am smiling wanly and slowly shutting the door behind me, nodding at him, saying "ok I'm shutting the door now... ok, goodnight.... ok, I'm going to shut this now..." We will be in the car, and his sister will start crying after half an hour and begging him to just stop talking to she can say something. I will say "you need to stop talking. Close your mouth. Close it." and his sister will chat with me for a bit, and as soon as she takes a breath or we fall silent, he will pick up right where he left off. I love him, and I'm interested in his thoughts and like to hear what he has to say, but it's utterly exhausting. We can't watch a sporting event on TV without his constant commentary. I have jokingly threatened to duct tape his mouth shut so I can actually hear what the refs are saying in a Commander's game. But like.... I'm only half joking. My husband can't even handle it, he watches the game alone in his office now.

[Anonymous]

While the PP's story absolutely sounds like ADHD, I will also note that my kid is very talkative and has days or phases where she can talk like that (very familiar with having to back out of a room like "I'm sorry I have to got to the bathroom, can you finish this story later???"). However she was evaluated for ADHD and not diagnosed. Her psychiatrist thought the talkatively was a reflection of high intelligence mixed with anxiety, and her therapist recommended keeping a daily journal. Which helped!

[Anonymous]

I talked a lot as a kid and it was anxiety mixed with a need to form connection with parents who did not have much interest in me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I talked a lot as a kid and it was anxiety mixed with a need to form connection with parents who did not have much interest in me.

This comment raises an important question: why is your kid talking so much? Like what are they trying to get out of it? Instead of viewing it as a possible, uncontrollable symptom of ADHD (which it might be, but also might not), see if you can figure out if there is some objective to their talking.

One hint that the goal may be connection or seeking understanding/validation, is if he tends to repeat the same things over and over. Especially if they are complaints.

If he often feels like he has to explain the whole backstory or context to something even when it's not totally relevant, that could be a sign that he's worried about being misunderstood or believed. Could be a sign of anxiety but could also reflect issues in his relationship with you or others.

Point is, if there seems to be a motivation behind the talking, it's worth it to explore that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As the parent of a child with ADHD where this is one of the biggest symptoms, I can only say, if you have to ask, then they're probably fine!

I'll be trying to leave his room and he will be following me, talking, even as I am smiling wanly and slowly shutting the door behind me, nodding at him, saying "ok I'm shutting the door now... ok, goodnight.... ok, I'm going to shut this now..." We will be in the car, and his sister will start crying after half an hour and begging him to just stop talking to she can say something. I will say "you need to stop talking. Close your mouth. Close it." and his sister will chat with me for a bit, and as soon as she takes a breath or we fall silent, he will pick up right where he left off. I love him, and I'm interested in his thoughts and like to hear what he has to say, but it's utterly exhausting. We can't watch a sporting event on TV without his constant commentary. I have jokingly threatened to duct tape his mouth shut so I can actually hear what the refs are saying in a Commander's game. But like.... I'm only half joking. My husband can't even handle it, he watches the game alone in his office now.

Yeah, that definitely sounds excessive! We are not at that level, thankfully. Is that basically where the bar is for this, or has anyone had a kid who was talkative but not *this* talkative but still "checked the box" for this as one of the criteria they were diagnosed based on?

Or even if it didn't end up applying to your kid, are there any helpful questions or explanations you've heard about this one that gave you some insight on what the dividing line is between talkative-but-normal and excessive-enough-that-it's-an-ADHD-symptom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As the parent of a child with ADHD where this is one of the biggest symptoms, I can only say, if you have to ask, then they're probably fine!

I'll be trying to leave his room and he will be following me, talking, even as I am smiling wanly and slowly shutting the door behind me, nodding at him, saying "ok I'm shutting the door now... ok, goodnight.... ok, I'm going to shut this now..." We will be in the car, and his sister will start crying after half an hour and begging him to just stop talking to she can say something. I will say "you need to stop talking. Close your mouth. Close it." and his sister will chat with me for a bit, and as soon as she takes a breath or we fall silent, he will pick up right where he left off. I love him, and I'm interested in his thoughts and like to hear what he has to say, but it's utterly exhausting. We can't watch a sporting event on TV without his constant commentary. I have jokingly threatened to duct tape his mouth shut so I can actually hear what the refs are saying in a Commander's game. But like.... I'm only half joking. My husband can't even handle it, he watches the game alone in his office now.

Yeah, that definitely sounds excessive! We are not at that level, thankfully. Is that basically where the bar is for this, or has anyone had a kid who was talkative but not *this* talkative but still "checked the box" for this as one of the criteria they were diagnosed based on?

Or even if it didn't end up applying to your kid, are there any helpful questions or explanations you've heard about this one that gave you some insight on what the dividing line is between talkative-but-normal and excessive-enough-that-it's-an-ADHD-symptom?

I think it needs to be disruptive, or affecting relationships with friends or family. Like the PPs son above clearly qualifies. Just chatty, but able to stop when asked , can take turns in conversation, doesn’t frequently annoy those around him with the amount of talking- I don’t think that’s qualifying. Basically, if it’s not affecting relationships then it’s not disruptive and it’s not a diagnosis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While the PP's story absolutely sounds like ADHD, I will also note that my kid is very talkative and has days or phases where she can talk like that (very familiar with having to back out of a room like "I'm sorry I have to got to the bathroom, can you finish this story later???"). However she was evaluated for ADHD and not diagnosed. Her psychiatrist thought the talkatively was a reflection of high intelligence mixed with anxiety, and her therapist recommended keeping a daily journal. Which helped!

I’m that PP and my son follows me to the bathroom when I say that hahaha. I’ll be like- I’m cutting you off and you can finish your story about the 1984 World Series , that I’ve already heard, when I’m out of the bathroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone have any insight on what amount of talking from a kid is considered "talking excessively" to the extent it would "count" toward the ADHD diagnosis? Anything you can share that you were told/asked during the process of your kid getting diagnosed?

If your child talks excessively you will ve left with no doubt.

Here are some ways I knew my child was an excessive talker: I could not hear myself think . I had to find coping mechanisms to maintain my sanity. I was very worried that I qas asking them to stop talking so often that I was effecting their self esteem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As the parent of a child with ADHD where this is one of the biggest symptoms, I can only say, if you have to ask, then they're probably fine!

I'll be trying to leave his room and he will be following me, talking, even as I am smiling wanly and slowly shutting the door behind me, nodding at him, saying "ok I'm shutting the door now... ok, goodnight.... ok, I'm going to shut this now..." We will be in the car, and his sister will start crying after half an hour and begging him to just stop talking to she can say something. I will say "you need to stop talking. Close your mouth. Close it." and his sister will chat with me for a bit, and as soon as she takes a breath or we fall silent, he will pick up right where he left off. I love him, and I'm interested in his thoughts and like to hear what he has to say, but it's utterly exhausting. We can't watch a sporting event on TV without his constant commentary. I have jokingly threatened to duct tape his mouth shut so I can actually hear what the refs are saying in a Commander's game. But like.... I'm only half joking. My husband can't even handle it, he watches the game alone in his office now.

[phone]

[Anonymous]

Agree with if you have to ask your kid probably doesn't meet this criteria. My kid does.

it's a constant narrative. like you have to tell him please pause so your sibling can talk. or OK but really stop and sleep now.

I call it the verbal diarrhea it's different from what others are describing as rooted in anxiety. this is just excited sharing of cool information all the time! If I dont share now I'll forget so I need to say it now!

[Anonymous]

I’ve had this my whole life and if you have to ask, the answer is it’s fine.
The kid probably knows because they’ve probably been on the situation where they think “why am I still talking! I need to stop talking!” I have an interior voice that tells me to STFU pretty much all the time. As a teen I would write stuff down to avoid blurting it out.

[Anonymous]

The girl at the museum whose parents dumped her in the audience for the kids show (and the apparently went away, what a surprise) and the girl then talked NON STOP through the whole talk, disturbing everyone around, despite literally three other parents (of the kids she was disturbing) yelling at her and telling her to STFU.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While the PP's story absolutely sounds like ADHD, I will also note that my kid is very talkative and has days or phases where she can talk like that (very familiar with having to back out of a room like "I'm sorry I have to got to the bathroom, can you finish this story later???"). However she was evaluated for ADHD and not diagnosed. Her psychiatrist thought the talkatively was a reflection of high intelligence mixed with anxiety, and her therapist recommended keeping a daily journal. Which helped!

ADHD talking is happy "fun" (for the talker).

Anxiety talking is unhappy stressed complaining/worrying and "problem-solving" (but not solving)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I call it the verbal diarrhea it's different from what others are describing as rooted in anxiety. this is just excited sharing of cool information all the time! If I dont share now I'll forget so I need to say it now!

Logorrhea