Late thirties women: where did you meet your husband?

I was previously married, found out my ex husband was living a double life, got divorced. The first weekend without my kids I posted on reddit basically saying I'm spiraling- what do parents do when they don't have their kids? Someone posted a really thoughtful response saying they were in the same mindset last year and have been fixing up their old victorian one room at a time, have stuck to their goal of reading one book a month, went to a couple concerts alone and ended up enjoying their own company, leveled up their cooking skills, started bike riding places they'd normally drive and overall being more health conscious and then really kindly said it's going to be ok.

Those are literally ALL things I love doing - home projects, reading, cooking, biking, live music - so I responded and said thanks for the kind reply and a lot of those suggestions really resonated with me and gave me hope I can be a whole person without my kids at times. We started chatting from there and at one point that first night I was literally belly laughing in bed alone at some of the conversation. We ended up talking for 2 months straight not sharing names or identifying info. He eventually asked if I'd want to meet for coffee or a drink. I asked if he wanted to know my name or see a picture of me first. He responded and said nope let's just have fun with it. If it feels like a date, lets laugh together at any first date awkwardness after 15+ years for both of us. If it doesn't feel like a date, let's enjoy the hell out of a new friend who gets it.

We both took the train in to the city and hilariously tried to find each other there (texting hi I'm in a black coat with jeans standing next to a pole etc) it took us a bit. Then we met and introduced ourselves by name. Got right in a cab and were so discombobulated that we got out of the cab and walked away without paying and got chased down by an angry cabby which led to a really good laugh as we profusely apologized and gave him a very good tip. The drink turned into a 9 hour first date and the rest is history. That initial conversation has never ended, we seriously talk at an insatiable frequency still. We go to concerts, bike rides, read together, cook together, do home projects. It's the best.

I don't think we'd have ever connected in real life based on our careers and social circles. There's something really cool about being let into someone's mind right off the bat in an uninhibited, anonymous way. I also think there's some special venn diagraming to two people who love reddit (and me DCUM)- we are both inherently empathetic, curious, kind, communicative people who are very interested in the human experience.

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11/03/2025 13:59

Subject: Late thirties women: where did you meet your husband?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Met mine in a choir also!

Love it! Is he a bass or a tenor?

I've been really impressed by how many good looking young guys go to shape-note songs around here, but I go with my husband so I have to keep my eyes on my music.

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11/03/2025 14:01

Subject: Late thirties women: where did you meet your husband?

quote

Anonymous

Contradancing. Those people are highly physical and there's often a waltz.

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11/03/2025 14:04

Subject: Late thirties women: where did you meet your husband?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On reddit

Please tell is more!

I was previously married, found out my ex husband was living a double life, got divorced. The first weekend without my kids I posted on reddit basically saying I'm spiraling- what do parents do when they don't have their kids? Someone posted a really thoughtful response saying they were in the same mindset last year and have been fixing up their old victorian one room at a time, have stuck to their goal of reading one book a month, went to a couple concerts alone and ended up enjoying their own company, leveled up their cooking skills, started bike riding places they'd normally drive and overall being more health conscious and then really kindly said it's going to be ok.

Those are literally ALL things I love doing - home projects, reading, cooking, biking, live music - so I responded and said thanks for the kind reply and a lot of those suggestions really resonated with me and gave me hope I can be a whole person without my kids at times. We started chatting from there and at one point that first night I was literally belly laughing in bed alone at some of the conversation. We ended up talking for 2 months straight not sharing names or identifying info. He eventually asked if I'd want to meet for coffee or a drink. I asked if he wanted to know my name or see a picture of me first. He responded and said nope let's just have fun with it. If it feels like a date, lets laugh together at any first date awkwardness after 15+ years for both of us. If it doesn't feel like a date, let's enjoy the hell out of a new friend who gets it.

We both took the train in to the city and hilariously tried to find each other there (texting hi I'm in a black coat with jeans standing next to a pole etc) it took us a bit. Then we met and introduced ourselves by name. Got right in a cab and were so discombobulated that we got out of the cab and walked away without paying and got chased down by an angry cabby which led to a really good laugh as we profusely apologized and gave him a very good tip. The drink turned into a 9 hour first date and the rest is history. That initial conversation has never ended, we seriously talk at an insatiable frequency still. We go to concerts, bike rides, read together, cook together, do home projects. It's the best.

I don't think we'd have ever connected in real life based on our careers and social circles. There's something really cool about being let into someone's mind right off the bat in an uninhibited, anonymous way. I also think there's some special venn diagraming to two people who love reddit (and me DCUM)- we are both inherently empathetic, curious, kind, communicative people who are very interested in the human experience.

How long have you been married?

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