Family wedding (no kids) - Should we both attend or just DH while I stay home with our kids?

[Anonymous]

DH's nephew is getting married and the wedding is in early November. DH and I are invited but our four girls aren't (12,9,7,5) as it is an adult-only wedding (21+). We live in a different state from my in-laws so we'd have to travel and be gone for a weekend. So, we'll have to either leave our DD's with my family or a sitter, or only DH would go and I'd stay back with the kids. DH says it's fine for him to go alone so we wouldn't have to leave our DD's and need a babysitter, but I don't think I can miss this wedding. We are kind of stuck between those two choices and are not sure what to do, what should we do?

[Anonymous]

Why can’t you miss this wedding?

[Anonymous]

It's fine for your husband to go alone. You don't have to go. Do you WANT to go? That's a different question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t you miss this wedding?

OP: I don't want it to seem uncordial since I was invited.

[Anonymous]

I would go in a heart beat. Leave the kids with family and enjoy a weekend away with your husband.

[Anonymous]

An invitation is not a summons. If the logistics are too difficult, you should stay.

[Anonymous]

Yea, why do you think you "have" to go. If the nephew thought you had to go, he'd invite the kids.

Not that I blame him. You have four, and they're not little. Inviting all six of you is a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t you miss this wedding?

OP: I don't want it to seem uncordial since I was invited.

I think you’re overthinking this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t you miss this wedding?

OP: I don't want it to seem uncordial since I was invited.

They were uncordial to you by not inviting your (four young!) kids. Stay home with a clear conscience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:An invitation is not a summons. If the logistics are too difficult, you should stay.

Can you vary your mantra? You say "an invitation is not a summons" in every one of these threads.

[Anonymous]

If you have family who can stay with them you’re in a dream situation. Enjoy it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:An invitation is not a summons. If the logistics are too difficult, you should stay.

Can you vary your mantra? You say "an invitation is not a summons" in every one of these threads.

I think you're confusing the fact that multiple people are saying this for it being one person's mantra.

[Anonymous]

Much simpler for him to go alone. When people exclude kids from weddings, they should understand that it may impact which adults can attend.

[Anonymous]

I would send DH and stay home with the kids. We live far from family and DH and I often split up to attend family things when our kids were young.

An invitation is not a command.

[Anonymous]

DH says it's fine for him to go alone ... but I don't think I can miss this wedding.

I don't get this, the bolded. If you can't go but your DH can, that's what happens. Stop feeling like this is an obligation.