why do bosses hate some coworkers

[Anonymous]

Imagine you're the boss and you allow a coworker to take 5 days off in the span of 2 months. Days off for watching hockey. Yeah. This employee is also late sometimes.
And you're the same boss now who has another employee but don't allow this person to work less hours. This person who is very reliable.

This is just one thing that shows that my hypothesis is correct. I just don't understand why. I haven't done anything wrong.

I truly believe this world is not for me. Some of us were just destined to suffer maybe. And for what? I am a flawed human being. But I am a great worker and very reliable. This I know for sure.
my boss just doesn't like me. This is just who I am in this world.

What I will say is that I am not an ass-kisser. I do not suck up whatsoever. But the thing is I feel like this is a mistake. You almost have to be fake to make it in our society. It just is what it is I guess.

[Anonymous]

If you're a woman who talks to other woman at work don't because they will eventually gossip about you to the wrong people or backstab you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Imagine you're the boss and you allow a coworker to take 5 days off in the span of 2 months. Days off for watching hockey. Yeah. This employee is also late sometimes.
And you're the same boss now who has another employee but don't allow this person to work less hours. This person who is very reliable.

This is just one thing that shows that my hypothesis is correct. I just don't understand why. I haven't done anything wrong.

I truly believe this world is not for me. Some of us were just destined to suffer maybe. And for what? I am a flawed human being. But I am a great worker and very reliable. This I know for sure.
my boss just doesn't like me. This is just who I am in this world.

What I will say is that I am not an ass-kisser. I do not suck up whatsoever. But the thing is I feel like this is a mistake. You almost have to be fake to make it in our society. It just is what it is I guess.

I read a book a few years ago that said humanity is domesticating/taming itself because we require a lot of conformity as a species. Outliers and people who speak up are not really very welcome. Ass-kissing is generally a more successful strategy.

[Anonymous]

Do both of you do the same job functions?
Maybe coworker that watched hockey does work that is not as time critical or that can be done intermittently and your work is different.

[Anonymous]

Did coworker use leave time? Are you not allowed to take leave?

[Anonymous]

yeah im going to start ass-kissing. But in a very non obnoxious way as possible.

Yes we have the same exact job.

I have never asked for leave I just asked for it for the first time and got a ” No! ”
So I guess I’m not allowed then 😂
-OP

[Anonymous]

Do you also have this "woe is me" attitude at work? The reality is, this other coworker has likely forged a better relationship with your boss and other coworkers than you have. Whether it's true or not, they are probably seen as more reliable, more of a team player, a go getter , a better worker, etc. These people tend to get treated well.

This was me at my old job. I'm sure people didn't like me but I was a good worker and I knew how to play the game to get myself in a favorable position.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
yeah im going to start ass-kissing. But in a very non obnoxious way as possible.

Yes we have the same exact job.

I have never asked for leave I just asked for it for the first time and got a ” No! ”
So I guess I’m not allowed then 😂
-OP

So ask for a different time. There may be an actual good reason why that time off wasn't approved. You're so dramatic and that's not a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you also have this "woe is me" attitude at work? The reality is, this other coworker has likely forged a better relationship with your boss and other coworkers than you have. Whether it's true or not, they are probably seen as more reliable, more of a team player, a go getter , a better worker, etc. These people tend to get treated well.

This was me at my old job. I'm sure people didn't like me but I was a good worker and I knew how to play the game to get myself in a favorable position.

your description does describe me to a T.
I am not a social butterfly.

So how do I play the game? The other guy that I mentioned talks so much. He talks all the time. And honestly I think it’s annoying and too much. But I wonder if the others see it as a positive thing?

Just me thinking about this stuff so much leads me to believe I have some sort of neurodivergency issue.
/op

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
yeah im going to start ass-kissing. But in a very non obnoxious way as possible.

Yes we have the same exact job.

I have never asked for leave I just asked for it for the first time and got a ” No! ”
So I guess I’m not allowed then 😂
-OP

So ask for a different time. There may be an actual good reason why that time off wasn't approved. You're so dramatic and that's not a good look.

When it comes to being a jovial person no I am not. But when it comes to a good look that doesn’t matter at my workplace.
The people who are the closest to the boss are the ones who sexually harass the women and make disgusting comments

[Anonymous]

The guy was caught hiding at work the other week and got a an earful to say the least /OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you also have this "woe is me" attitude at work? The reality is, this other coworker has likely forged a better relationship with your boss and other coworkers than you have. Whether it's true or not, they are probably seen as more reliable, more of a team player, a go getter , a better worker, etc. These people tend to get treated well.

This was me at my old job. I'm sure people didn't like me but I was a good worker and I knew how to play the game to get myself in a favorable position.

your description does describe me to a T.
I am not a social butterfly.

So how do I play the game? The other guy that I mentioned talks so much. He talks all the time. And honestly I think it’s annoying and too much. But I wonder if the others see it as a positive thing?

Just me thinking about this stuff so much leads me to believe I have some sort of neurodivergency issue.
/op

I'm actually not a huge talker, I'm naturally a bit introverted and shy. But I push myself to be personable and talk to people. People are getting together for lunch? Ok I'm going. Boss needs someone to show someone around? I'm volunteering. I'm paying attention to what my coworkers say and following up with them. My coworker mentions their kid is trying out for soccer? A few days later I'll ask how it went. I also worked my butt off at my actual job and went above and beyond there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you also have this "woe is me" attitude at work? The reality is, this other coworker has likely forged a better relationship with your boss and other coworkers than you have. Whether it's true or not, they are probably seen as more reliable, more of a team player, a go getter , a better worker, etc. These people tend to get treated well.

This was me at my old job. I'm sure people didn't like me but I was a good worker and I knew how to play the game to get myself in a favorable position.

your description does describe me to a T.
I am not a social butterfly.

So how do I play the game? The other guy that I mentioned talks so much. He talks all the time. And honestly I think it’s annoying and too much. But I wonder if the others see it as a positive thing?

Just me thinking about this stuff so much leads me to believe I have some sort of neurodivergency issue.
/op

Maybe you do, and that's OK. My son is diagnosed ADHD/ASD, because his symptoms are unmistakable, but ever since researching it and talking to his psych, I've realized that a lot of people on my side and my husband's side have the same tendencies, just milder. One of my maternal aunts, my father, my husband, one of his brothers and two of my husband's nephews.

Neurodivergence is everywhere and very little of it meets the threshhold of clinical diagnosis, which is as it should be. It doesn't mean that the rest are all the same, with the same capacity for socialization. What is normal anyway?

If you have difficulty understanding non-verbal cues and socializing and dealing with finer points of politicking, you are not alone. A lot of us are like this. It's going to be OK, OP. Just do what you can.

[Anonymous]

You sound like a difficult employee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you also have this "woe is me" attitude at work? The reality is, this other coworker has likely forged a better relationship with your boss and other coworkers than you have. Whether it's true or not, they are probably seen as more reliable, more of a team player, a go getter , a better worker, etc. These people tend to get treated well.

This was me at my old job. I'm sure people didn't like me but I was a good worker and I knew how to play the game to get myself in a favorable position.

I worked in this environment once. The boss was a woman and she treated her favorites like her best friends/daughters. If you didn't kiss her azz you were sidelined. She used work as her social outlet. Kinda sad.