Advice for nanny shares arrangement

[Anonymous]

We are in NWDC and looking for a nanny share for our infant. We found a very experienced nanny (15+ years, 8 years with most recent family) who comes highly recommended. She has a 6 month old and is interested in a share with another family + her kiddo. We would host, which is convenient for us as I WFH and it would allow me to nurse and our kid would be able to sleep in his room etc. She is requesting 18-20$/hour. There are some clear benefits since we don’t have to work out logistics with another family per se but we’re new to this so I’m seeking advice from those with more experience with nanny shares.
1. Is this a reasonable hourly rate? I have seen lower rates on this forum $14-17/hour/family for nanny shares but understand that we will be her only income.
2. Do folks have concerns about this arrangement in terms of fairness - (likelihood that her kid receive more attention?) or any other potential problems that folks foresee?
3. Our other option is a more traditional nanny share with another family in the neighborhood with a similar aged kid. Either of us could host. Which option would you pick?

Any other advice in terms of how to set up the contract/expectations if we go with the first option would be helpful. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

I'm sure it could work but it also sounds like it could be really messy. You're both her employer and also have to be flexible with her needs/wants as a parent.

Since it's your first time doing a share I wouldn't recommend this.

[Anonymous]

My advice is to not do a nanny share.

[Anonymous]

Holy cow this is way, way under market rate because it's not a nanny share.

I brought my daughter with me to nanny for 3 years and charged $29/hr

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Holy cow this is way, way under market rate because it's not a nanny share.

I brought my daughter with me to nanny for 3 years and charged $29/hr

I did something similar and never discounted by regular rates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Holy cow this is way, way under market rate because it's not a nanny share.

I brought my daughter with me to nanny for 3 years and charged $29/hr

I did something similar and never discounted by regular rates.

Well that sounds crazy. There’s no way I’d believe as the “other” parent in the “share” that you’d be prioritizing each child evenly. It’s a benefit to you to bring your child. You’d be paying someone or a family member would have to watch them if it weren’t for your arrangement.

As a mother and as an employer I see no reason why you wouldn’t be discounted but also I would never do it.

We did nanny shares and loved them but it’s highly family and nanny dependent and there are lessons along the way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

As a mother and as an employer I see no reason why you wouldn’t be discounted but also I would never do it.

We did nanny shares and loved them but it’s highly family and nanny dependent and there are lessons along the way

OP here - We’re leaning towards option 2, the more traditional nanny share but it would be helpful to hear why you wouldn’t do the option 1 arrangement.
Also please share what lessons you picked up about nanny shares. We’re trying to going into this eyes wide open and with as much info as possible. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

OP here - We’re leaning towards option 2, the more traditional nanny share but it would be helpful to hear why you wouldn’t do the option 1 arrangement.
Also please share what lessons you picked up about nanny shares. We’re trying to going into this eyes wide open and with as much info as possible. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Number one rule for a nannyshare is to discuss when the share will end/what happens if one family leaves the share for whatever reason.

Also having your baby at home while you WFH sucks. You think it’s going to be convenient but it’s not. You will not be able to leave your office area because if your baby sees you she’ll cry which will break your heart. You won’t be able to focus because you can hear the baby crying and you’ll be wondering what the nanny is doing. This is especially so if this is your first baby.

[Anonymous]

This isn't a nanny share. This is a nanny bringing her child to work. Having two infants in the house would be very noisy except if you have a bit house. I would not pay more than $14-16 an hour as that would be $28-32 doubled for two kids. She wants a full income with bringing her baby which means you are paying full price for 1/2 the attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This isn't a nanny share. This is a nanny bringing her child to work. Having two infants in the house would be very noisy except if you have a bit house. I would not pay more than $14-16 an hour as that would be $28-32 doubled for two kids. She wants a full income with bringing her baby which means you are paying full price for 1/2 the attention.

Precisely

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Holy cow this is way, way under market rate because it's not a nanny share.

I brought my daughter with me to nanny for 3 years and charged $29/hr

This is nuts.

I can’t imagine paying regular rates for a nanny to watch someone else’s kid. Kudos to you for pulling it off.

[Anonymous]

Here’s something to consider.

This nanny plans to take care of 3 infants. You would have a higher adult to child ratio at a daycare.

Let that sink in.

Your baby would get more attention in daycare than with the nanny share you described. Most daycares have a 1:2 ratio for infants. You’re essentially sacrificing your baby’s care to subsidize the nanny’s free childcare. And at the infant level, experience beyond a certain point is meaningless. Babies want to be held and fed and changed when they want it. There’s no way to manage that with 3 without making other babies wait.