How many dates until you commit?

[Anonymous]

I’ve gone on 6 dates with a man over the last 6 weeks. We’ve slept together the last 3.

Last night after a date/sex, I asked if he was sleeping with anyone else. He said yes, he’s dating and sleeping with one other woman.

He’s been inviting me to meet his friends and family, so I’m confused. I don’t expect us to declare ourselves boyfriend/girlfriend, but I feel like 6 dates is enough to know if you’re into someone enough to stop having sex with other people. Especially if you think things are serious enough to meet friends.

Am I expecting monogamy way too early? Is he just not that into me?

[Anonymous]

Yeah, he's not super into you, but he's getting sex so why not continue. I follow the "no sex without monogamy" thing because that's what works for me. Clearly that's not what works for him. You have to decide if you need that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, he's not super into you, but he's getting sex so why not continue. I follow the "no sex without monogamy" thing because that's what works for me. Clearly that's not what works for him. You have to decide if you need that.

I wouldn’t have been opposed to just hooking up (he’s cute and good in bed), I just find it odd he wasn’t honest with me about sleeping with someone else and not seeing relationship potential with me.

[Anonymous]

He was honest with you.

[Anonymous]

You could have asked him before you chose to sleep with him. I don’t think he lied or even lied by omission. You’ve been on a few dates if this was a dealbreaker for you it should have been a dealbreaker prior to intimacy not after.

[Anonymous]

Ew.

[Anonymous]

You didn't ask. That's on you.

When he asked he told you the truth.

Some people introduce their friends to everyone you really can't assume.
And that's your issue you you make assumptions rather than communicate.
Relationships don't exist in your head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve gone on 6 dates with a man over the last 6 weeks. We’ve slept together the last 3.

Last night after a date/sex, I asked if he was sleeping with anyone else. He said yes, he’s dating and sleeping with one other woman.

He’s been inviting me to meet his friends and family, so I’m confused. I don’t expect us to declare ourselves boyfriend/girlfriend, but I feel like 6 dates is enough to know if you’re into someone enough to stop having sex with other people. Especially if you think things are serious enough to meet friends.

Am I expecting monogamy way too early? Is he just not that into me?

Gross.
I just dont get sleeping with some guy who isn’t exclusive with you.
Of I offered you a sip of punch out of the same glass that everyone else was drinking out of at a party, you’d probably have the discernment to hesitate and decline. Because gross.

And yet that’s exactly what you are doing when you are exchanging bodily fluids with this dude who is also exchanging them “one other woman” and God knows who else she’s sleeping with. Just gross.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t sleep with anyone until we were exclusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve gone on 6 dates with a man over the last 6 weeks. We’ve slept together the last 3.

Last night after a date/sex, I asked if he was sleeping with anyone else. He said yes, he’s dating and sleeping with one other woman.

He’s been inviting me to meet his friends and family, so I’m confused. I don’t expect us to declare ourselves boyfriend/girlfriend, but I feel like 6 dates is enough to know if you’re into someone enough to stop having sex with other people. Especially if you think things are serious enough to meet friends.

Am I expecting monogamy way too early? Is he just not that into me?

Gross.
I just dont get sleeping with some guy who isn’t exclusive with you.
Of I offered you a sip of punch out of the same glass that everyone else was drinking out of at a party, you’d probably have the discernment to hesitate and decline. Because gross.

And yet that’s exactly what you are doing when you are exchanging bodily fluids with this dude who is also exchanging them “one other woman” and God knows who else she’s sleeping with. Just gross.

I mean, I didn’t know he was until last night. Up until then we were definitely “relationship-lite” and I thought he was really into me. He was introducing me to people in his life and when I was PMSing and feeling really depressed recently, he cancelled his plans to come over and cheer me up, and ordered me DoorDash the next couple days. So I thought he was pretty into me.

Was just kinda shocked to hear he’s still sleeping with someone else, when his behavior indicated he saw us heading to a relationship and was into me.

[Anonymous]

I’d dump him immediately and run to get tested for STIs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t sleep with anyone until we were exclusive.

+1 and I'm a man. Can't enjoy being intimate with someone until we know each other well enough to have the exclusively talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t sleep with anyone until we were exclusive.

+1 and I'm a man. Can't enjoy being intimate with someone until we know each other well enough to have the exclusively talk.

You are a rare exception. 70% men and women on OLD have different partners at a time. It’s statistically confirmed, there was a report published at some point

[Anonymous]

He don’t want the cow honey.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t sleep with anyone until we were exclusive.

+1 and I'm a man. Can't enjoy being intimate with someone until we know each other well enough to have the exclusively talk.

You are a rare exception. 70% men and women on OLD have different partners at a time. It’s statistically confirmed, there was a report published at some point

I don't care and live to my own standards. Would have no interest to date the great majority of women out there.