Son desperate to play high school football

[Anonymous]

Rising freshman is desperate to play. He is objectively good, but I am terrified of injury, especially cte. If your kid plays in the DMV area, can you share your experience? I am not necessarily wavering, but I hate disappointing my kid. If you successfully explained to your kid why the cannot play, what worked? Did they ever get over it? I am definitely still harboring some decisions my parents made that I thought unfair.

[Anonymous]

Why is he desperate to play? Is there a specific reason he wants to do football over other spofts? I would ask him a lot of questions and have him do a lot of research on long term risk of concussion before you say yes or no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is he desperate to play? Is there a specific reason he wants to do football over other spofts? I would ask him a lot of questions and have him do a lot of research on long term risk of concussion before you say yes or no.

Friends doing it. Perceived coolness. He plays flag football and he is really good.

[Anonymous]

Never should’ve agreed to flag football. It’s a gateway to tackle which is why the nfl is promoting it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never should’ve agreed to flag football. It’s a gateway to tackle which is why the nfl is promoting it.

😭. You are right. I told him I would let him play as a compromise to not playing tackle. It's a recent thing. Any advice for me moving forward?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never should’ve agreed to flag football. It’s a gateway to tackle which is why the nfl is promoting it.

😭. You are right. I told him I would let him play as a compromise to not playing tackle. It's a recent thing. Any advice for me moving forward?

I’m not kidding when I say make him
Do an entire research paper, 5 pages, on the risk of concussion in football AND the effects that concussions (especially multiple) have on your physical and mental health in years to come. Show him how to find reliable sources (not ChatGPT)

[Anonymous]

Watch the Aaron Hernandez doc w him.

[Anonymous]

All sports have risk. Do you let him play other things?

[Anonymous]

I had a kid who wanted the same and we had the same concerns. We finally let him freshman year. Socially it was great for him and practically the team was coached well, however, it was not his main sport and his grades weren't good so we made him drop it. FF to senior year, he wants to play again and coach is actively recruiting him to play bc he's a good athlete. He actually had committed to college in another sport. We told him to contact his college coach who responded with "have fun" so we let him. One injury half way through the season and his college sports career went up in flames.

[Anonymous]

My boys both really wanted to play though not “desperately.” We explained our reasoning, which they kind of got and successfully steered them to other sports. My athletic junior still kind grumbles about it and thinks he’d be a star, but not in a very serious way. It helped to have other year-round sports they could lean into and that would cause conflicts with football.

In retrospect we maybe should have gotten them involved in lacrosse (team sport, some cool factor) but that ship failed.

I have a brother who played rugby in high school and college with multiple concussions and some other injuries that I am fairly certain contributed to his chronic depression and some other health issues as an adult. My kids both know this about their uncle and I think it helps them understand, if not fully accept, our reasoning.

[Anonymous]

Like any parenting decision, you have to be confident that it's the right choice for your kid. You sound like you are wavering a bit.

Some of the injuries are terrible. Kids regularly have season-ending injuries at games. It seems to be worse among kids who handle the ball (not linemen.) It's obviously too soon to tell for CTE.

There are great benefits as well. Being part of a very large team is a great way to start high school. It helps to have coaches who will get after your kid for behavior or skipping class. And the mental health benefits of the exercise as well as outlets for aggression are a real plus for some kids.

I think the real question is, do the benefits outweigh the risks for your kid?

[Anonymous]

OP. He plays another sport competitively year round. I feel confident that him not playing is the right decision and I want him to be okay with that and not hate me forever. He and his dad thinks the benefits outweigh the risks. I do not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a kid who wanted the same and we had the same concerns. We finally let him freshman year. Socially it was great for him and practically the team was coached well, however, it was not his main sport and his grades weren't good so we made him drop it. FF to senior year, he wants to play again and coach is actively recruiting him to play bc he's a good athlete. He actually had committed to college in another sport. We told him to contact his college coach who responded with "have fun" so we let him. One injury half way through the season and his college sports career went up in flames.

I am so sorry for your son. These kids think they are invincible and nothing bad will happen to him. I hope he ultimately landed well.

[Anonymous]

This is a problem of your making, OP. You should never have let him pursue this sport when he was younger. If he's such a good athlete, you could have oriented him into another, safer, but equally fun sport.

Sorry, but this needs to be said. Now you actually DO have to educate him on the risks of cumulative concussions. If he's disappointed, too bad for both of you. Fun today should not be prioritized over early-onset dementia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a problem of your making, OP. You should never have let him pursue this sport when he was younger. If he's such a good athlete, you could have oriented him into another, safer, but equally fun sport.

Sorry, but this needs to be said. Now you actually DO have to educate him on the risks of cumulative concussions. If he's disappointed, too bad for both of you. Fun today should not be prioritized over early-onset dementia.

He's been playing flag for four months to try to scratch the football itch. But your other points are valid, thanks.