The Seen-it-All feeling

[Anonymous]

I am only 42, yet I’m starting to get this feeling. Major betrayals and poor behavior from family or friends, extreme politics and cruelty, the roll of the dice causing really unfair outcomes for good people…

I feel at my age, starting off as an idealistic extrovert, my circle is getting much smaller, I am being more stoic with age, and I’m becoming more content with my own company even if it’s lonely sometimes.

I find this to be the hardest part of aging so far, not the external factors (looks). But I don’t hear people talk about this side of things, ever. So I’m starting a thread to talk about the wisdom we’re gaining.

[Anonymous]

I definitely feel this way. I’ve traveled, I’ve met people, had to deal with people. I’m done with friendships. They don’t last and can even hurt. I work remotely and trust to an extent only. When it comes to family I care about my kids, dh, my parents, my brother, sil and nephew and that is about it. Everyone else I wish well but don’t need interaction. Even travel is less interesting unless it’s to wide spaces with no people disappointment risk.

I am not sad at all though: actually very happy at home with my pets reading and gardening. But the world at large? Reading about it, and not too much, is fine with me.

[Anonymous]

It's part of aging.

[Anonymous]

Look at it this way, the circle is smaller but it is more concentrated on what really matters.

As I age, I realize quality is more important over quantity. Whether its people, places, or things.

[Anonymous]

I’ve always been an introvert, but now that I’m
in my 50s I don’t hide it or try to be extroverted. I think we all learn as we get older, sounds like you have. I’m fortunate, though: no major betrayals, poor behavior etc. So, I’m still motivated ti out myself out there, don’t feel jaded. But, it’s 100% normal to feel that way given what you’ve experienced!

[Anonymous]

I’m 39 and feel somewhat similar, but am also very excited about life and the future. I’m naturally pretty positive (though I wouldn’t say optimistic) and things are going really well, so I think it’s a normal way to feel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 39 and feel somewhat similar, but am also very excited about life and the future. I’m naturally pretty positive (though I wouldn’t say optimistic) and things are going really well, so I think it’s a normal way to feel.

I’ll note that I’ve experienced a lot of grief and trauma in my life, including severe childhood abuse, divorce, and many other sad experiences. Still pretty positive. I did a a LOT of inner work over several years, which helped.