Are you ever shocked when people lie about easily proven things?

[Anonymous]

I always am even though I've seen it happen plenty of times. It's doesn't shock me because I can't believe anyone would lie or because I expect people to be ethical. It shocks me because I can't believe anyone has the confidence to think they can get away with it. Like I would never, and the biggest reason why is that I assume people will not believe me or feel confident that getting caught in the lie would be so much worse.

But the interesting thing is that the people I've encountered who lie like this (brazenly) get away with it more often than not. I think they've figured out that most people are pretty lazy and are okay just going along with whatever someone tells them -- challenging someone over whether what they are telling you is the truth, takes work, and will inevitably result in conflict. It's easier to just go alone.

Yet I still find myself totally astounded when people lie like this. I caught someone in a lie like this today -- a big lie that was obvious to me because I'd already spoken to the their spouse about it. When I called them out on it, they just smiled and shrugged like "whoopsie, oh well." Amazing.

[Anonymous]

I work with someone who lies a lot, and it really freaks me out.

For example, last month I was eating lunch in our staffroom with this person and one other person. There was no one else in the room. The liar listened avidly as the other person told a story about a strange thing that had happened to him a few years ago (it was a really good story). Shorty after that, I heard the liar telling that same story to someone else, but she told it as if it had happened to her. It was so strange.

A few other colleagues have caught on, and we swap stories that Liar tells us, laughing at the inconsistencies. For example, she told one person an elaborate tale of something her cat did that week (cute story about the cat waking her up), but told someone else the same week that she is a dog person (agreeing with the person she was talking to at the time) and would never get a cat.

She has told multiple people it was her birthday, but on different days (different months!).

You know how you might have had something crazy happen to you once, something that sounds unbelievable, but it really happened? She has SO MANY of these wild tales. While some people have caught on to the fact that she is a liar, there are also people at work who don't seem to get it, and sit enthralled as Liar spins her wild tales.

And she lies about details having to do with our job, which is most disturbing. I work in the same department and see this first-hand, and it is really irritating when she says she did something but didn't, or says the paperwork is complete but it is not, and then she doubles down on her tales.

Our supervisor recently told me that a few months ago, Liar had told her something about me that Liar felt supervisor should "speak to" me about. The supervisor said that she didn't say anything to me because "I never saw any evidence of what she was saying", and the gist of the conversation was that supervisor hinted she knows Liar is...a liar.

[Anonymous]

It surprises me too because I expect people to be as honest as me. I'm pretty intolerant of lies even white lies.

[Anonymous]

I work with someone like this, who told me she can lie in reflex. It sucks working with someone like this as I work in one of the most ethical professions. It causes me stress knowing often she lies.

[Anonymous]

I have dealt with this too and wonder the same thing. How are they so confident they won't get caught? Are they dumb enough not to know some things are easy to verify (ex. Prior college athlete)? I confronted a friend's spouse on a lie about a job that was adversely impacting my friend and it the friend's spouse doubled down even despite verified information stating otherwise! Needless to say it didn't end well and not something I care to do again, even if it has negative impact on someone close to me. People who do this are red flags and I stay away from them as much as I can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work with someone who lies a lot, and it really freaks me out.

For example, last month I was eating lunch in our staffroom with this person and one other person. There was no one else in the room. The liar listened avidly as the other person told a story about a strange thing that had happened to him a few years ago (it was a really good story). Shorty after that, I heard the liar telling that same story to someone else, but she told it as if it had happened to her. It was so strange.

A few other colleagues have caught on, and we swap stories that Liar tells us, laughing at the inconsistencies. For example, she told one person an elaborate tale of something her cat did that week (cute story about the cat waking her up), but told someone else the same week that she is a dog person (agreeing with the person she was talking to at the time) and would never get a cat.

She has told multiple people it was her birthday, but on different days (different months!).

You know how you might have had something crazy happen to you once, something that sounds unbelievable, but it really happened? She has SO MANY of these wild tales. While some people have caught on to the fact that she is a liar, there are also people at work who don't seem to get it, and sit enthralled as Liar spins her wild tales.

And she lies about details having to do with our job, which is most disturbing. I work in the same department and see this first-hand, and it is really irritating when she says she did something but didn't, or says the paperwork is complete but it is not, and then she doubles down on her tales.

Our supervisor recently told me that a few months ago, Liar had told her something about me that Liar felt supervisor should "speak to" me about. The supervisor said that she didn't say anything to me because "I never saw any evidence of what she was saying", and the gist of the conversation was that supervisor hinted she knows Liar is...a liar.

This is an actual psychiatric disorder akin to OCD, and it's extremely difficult to control, especially if the person doesn't realize they need OCD-specific therapy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work with someone who lies a lot, and it really freaks me out.

For example, last month I was eating lunch in our staffroom with this person and one other person. There was no one else in the room. The liar listened avidly as the other person told a story about a strange thing that had happened to him a few years ago (it was a really good story). Shorty after that, I heard the liar telling that same story to someone else, but she told it as if it had happened to her. It was so strange.

A few other colleagues have caught on, and we swap stories that Liar tells us, laughing at the inconsistencies. For example, she told one person an elaborate tale of something her cat did that week (cute story about the cat waking her up), but told someone else the same week that she is a dog person (agreeing with the person she was talking to at the time) and would never get a cat.

She has told multiple people it was her birthday, but on different days (different months!).

You know how you might have had something crazy happen to you once, something that sounds unbelievable, but it really happened? She has SO MANY of these wild tales. While some people have caught on to the fact that she is a liar, there are also people at work who don't seem to get it, and sit enthralled as Liar spins her wild tales.

And she lies about details having to do with our job, which is most disturbing. I work in the same department and see this first-hand, and it is really irritating when she says she did something but didn't, or says the paperwork is complete but it is not, and then she doubles down on her tales.

Our supervisor recently told me that a few months ago, Liar had told her something about me that Liar felt supervisor should "speak to" me about. The supervisor said that she didn't say anything to me because "I never saw any evidence of what she was saying", and the gist of the conversation was that supervisor hinted she knows Liar is...a liar.

Sounds like this person has a personality disorder.

[Anonymous]

I tend to think big talkers are full of shit, because they usually are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work with someone who lies a lot, and it really freaks me out.

For example, last month I was eating lunch in our staffroom with this person and one other person. There was no one else in the room. The liar listened avidly as the other person told a story about a strange thing that had happened to him a few years ago (it was a really good story). Shorty after that, I heard the liar telling that same story to someone else, but she told it as if it had happened to her. It was so strange.

A few other colleagues have caught on, and we swap stories that Liar tells us, laughing at the inconsistencies. For example, she told one person an elaborate tale of something her cat did that week (cute story about the cat waking her up), but told someone else the same week that she is a dog person (agreeing with the person she was talking to at the time) and would never get a cat.

She has told multiple people it was her birthday, but on different days (different months!).

You know how you might have had something crazy happen to you once, something that sounds unbelievable, but it really happened? She has SO MANY of these wild tales. While some people have caught on to the fact that she is a liar, there are also people at work who don't seem to get it, and sit enthralled as Liar spins her wild tales.

And she lies about details having to do with our job, which is most disturbing. I work in the same department and see this first-hand, and it is really irritating when she says she did something but didn't, or says the paperwork is complete but it is not, and then she doubles down on her tales.

Our supervisor recently told me that a few months ago, Liar had told her something about me that Liar felt supervisor should "speak to" me about. The supervisor said that she didn't say anything to me because "I never saw any evidence of what she was saying", and the gist of the conversation was that supervisor hinted she knows Liar is...a liar.

This is an actual psychiatric disorder akin to OCD, and it's extremely difficult to control, especially if the person doesn't realize they need OCD-specific therapy.

Do you think she could be dangerous somehow?

I honestly wonder about this sometimes, especially considering what I wrote in my pp about something Liar told our supervisor about me.

[Anonymous]

My SIL is a compulsive liar and when I realized it I was shocked. Now I just don’t believe anything she tells me, because I can’t waste my energy on trying to figure out what’s true and what’s a lie. She does it to amuse herself, because she’s bored, because she’s a fantasist, because she’s not entirely content with her lot in life, because she likes to act, and because she can. Apparently she’s always been like this.

I used to get mad because I feel like when someone lies to you, they are treating you like you are gullible and a fool. Now I just emotionally disengage and assume everything she says to me is at least partly a lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work with someone who lies a lot, and it really freaks me out.

For example, last month I was eating lunch in our staffroom with this person and one other person. There was no one else in the room. The liar listened avidly as the other person told a story about a strange thing that had happened to him a few years ago (it was a really good story). Shorty after that, I heard the liar telling that same story to someone else, but she told it as if it had happened to her. It was so strange.

A few other colleagues have caught on, and we swap stories that Liar tells us, laughing at the inconsistencies. For example, she told one person an elaborate tale of something her cat did that week (cute story about the cat waking her up), but told someone else the same week that she is a dog person (agreeing with the person she was talking to at the time) and would never get a cat.

She has told multiple people it was her birthday, but on different days (different months!).

You know how you might have had something crazy happen to you once, something that sounds unbelievable, but it really happened? She has SO MANY of these wild tales. While some people have caught on to the fact that she is a liar, there are also people at work who don't seem to get it, and sit enthralled as Liar spins her wild tales.

And she lies about details having to do with our job, which is most disturbing. I work in the same department and see this first-hand, and it is really irritating when she says she did something but didn't, or says the paperwork is complete but it is not, and then she doubles down on her tales.

Our supervisor recently told me that a few months ago, Liar had told her something about me that Liar felt supervisor should "speak to" me about. The supervisor said that she didn't say anything to me because "I never saw any evidence of what she was saying", and the gist of the conversation was that supervisor hinted she knows Liar is...a liar.

This is an actual psychiatric disorder akin to OCD, and it's extremely difficult to control, especially if the person doesn't realize they need OCD-specific therapy.

My ex-SIL is like this. Everyone who knows her, knows she lies about everything, big and small. If someone calls her out she acts surprised, a bit stupefied, and then she will say she was confused, or that's what she meant. She never, ever admits to lying. It's easy to laugh off, until the lies get so big they have the ability to destroy lives. It's puzzling. Her own kids (late teens) know she's a liar, I feel terrible for them.

[Anonymous]

A good friend told me that their child got a full ride to college. Not for sports. I don’t believe them. I’m not going to call them out on it but although their child is wonderful, they weren’t straight A and I just don’t believe that colleges hand out full rides for nothing. But we’ve been friends for decades and my kids are younger so I haven’t been through college applications, so I have no clue if or why the would lie.

[Anonymous]

You mean like thousands of politicians & journalists & famous entertainers swearing that someone is sharper than ever when all empirical evidence points the other way? That would never happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work with someone who lies a lot, and it really freaks me out.

For example, last month I was eating lunch in our staffroom with this person and one other person. There was no one else in the room. The liar listened avidly as the other person told a story about a strange thing that had happened to him a few years ago (it was a really good story). Shorty after that, I heard the liar telling that same story to someone else, but she told it as if it had happened to her. It was so strange.

A few other colleagues have caught on, and we swap stories that Liar tells us, laughing at the inconsistencies. For example, she told one person an elaborate tale of something her cat did that week (cute story about the cat waking her up), but told someone else the same week that she is a dog person (agreeing with the person she was talking to at the time) and would never get a cat.

She has told multiple people it was her birthday, but on different days (different months!).

You know how you might have had something crazy happen to you once, something that sounds unbelievable, but it really happened? She has SO MANY of these wild tales. While some people have caught on to the fact that she is a liar, there are also people at work who don't seem to get it, and sit enthralled as Liar spins her wild tales.

And she lies about details having to do with our job, which is most disturbing. I work in the same department and see this first-hand, and it is really irritating when she says she did something but didn't, or says the paperwork is complete but it is not, and then she doubles down on her tales.

Our supervisor recently told me that a few months ago, Liar had told her something about me that Liar felt supervisor should "speak to" me about. The supervisor said that she didn't say anything to me because "I never saw any evidence of what she was saying", and the gist of the conversation was that supervisor hinted she knows Liar is...a liar.

This is an actual psychiatric disorder akin to OCD, and it's extremely difficult to control, especially if the person doesn't realize they need OCD-specific therapy.

Prove it

[Anonymous]

Yep, Daughter’s friend’s mom told me her daughter got a full scholarship at the same college my DD will attend, so annoying these competitive moms.