Custody question - what did it take to get more than 50-50

[Anonymous]

For those who were able to get more than half custody, assuming the other spouse wanted half, what did it take?

If there was emotional abuse towards the child and both physical and emotional towards the mother how and what did you document?

My friend did speak to a few attorneys but they said that emotional abuse towards children is hard to prove and has to be horrendous to really matter much in family court.

[Anonymous]

Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

Yes, and that wouldn't fly where I am. In many places, 50/50 is presumed. It would take something like documented abuse of the child (like, medically/state documented) to not have it if both parties want it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

Its not to that poster. They didn't work so they needed the extra child support and alimony as income. And, to keep the house. Sounds like she screwed over the ex big time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

Yes, and that wouldn't fly where I am. In many places, 50/50 is presumed. It would take something like documented abuse of the child (like, medically/state documented) to not have it if both parties want it.

That's great if its not like that where you live but the reality is its like that in most places.

[Anonymous]

Money. Forwent extra child support for extra time. Ex was really always about the bottom line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

It's common. The children get higher priority than the parents. Parent gets visitation rights if they aren't willing to provide for their children in custody.

https://www.thelenlaw.com/blog/2021/04/how-living-accommodations-could-impact-child-custody/#:~:text=Separate%20rooms,rule%20that%20every%20court%20follows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

Its not to that poster. They didn't work so they needed the extra child support and alimony as income. And, to keep the house. Sounds like she screwed over the ex big time.

Ex could have offered to pay for caring for the kids at ex's own home, but chose not to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

Yes, and that wouldn't fly where I am. In many places, 50/50 is presumed. It would take something like documented abuse of the child (like, medically/state documented) to not have it if both parties want it.

That's great if its not like that where you live but the reality is its like that in most places.

Are you posting from 1987? A simple google search brings up a current chart that shows that 50/50 is presumptive in the majority of states.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

It's common. The children get higher priority than the parents. Parent gets visitation rights if they aren't willing to provide for their children in custody.

https://www.thelenlaw.com/blog/2021/04/how-living-accommodations-could-impact-child-custody/#:~:text=Separate%20rooms,rule%20that%20every%20court%20follows.

This is a Wisconsin firm, where 50/50 is not presumed, yet over 50% of divorced parents do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

And what if the kid is unhappy with those living conditions? Would it still be ridiculous?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those who were able to get more than half custody, assuming the other spouse wanted half, what did it take?

If there was emotional abuse towards the child and both physical and emotional towards the mother how and what did you document?

My friend did speak to a few attorneys but they said that emotional abuse towards children is hard to prove and has to be horrendous to really matter much in family court.

Your “friend” is a moron and this is none of your business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ex had one bedroom apartment, and judge preferred to see kids in their own home with separate bedrooms. I was a SAHM too, so I offered more stability.

That's ridiculous and not a reason to keep the kids from their other parent.

And what if the kid is unhappy with those living conditions? Would it still be ridiculous?

You know, families living in one bedroom apartments is not unusual in high cost cities, right? The kid has a bed and a home.

[Anonymous]

The forensic evaluator said my ex was “too selfish to effectively parent long term” and recommended custody to me, visitation to him.

So that’s what happened.