If your kid goes to a school 8+ hours away, and you helped move them out of the dorm

[Anonymous]

I wasn't sure if I should put this in the mid-life concerns forum or here. I need a reality check, I'm in my late 40s.
A few days ago I drove 9 hours to my kid's school to help move him out of the dorm. It was hot and sunny outside the whole ride and the contrast of the hot beating sun and the cold A/C typically just makes me feel a little sick on long rides. A lot of the roads had construction where I had to drive miles right next to a Jersey wall which I find a bit nerve racking.

By the time I arrived at his school (around 4:30 pm) he had most his stuff packed in bags and bins but it's hard to get one of those huge laundry carts there (it's just "first come first serve" no way to sign up or reserve it.) So we had to make multiple trips from his 3rd floor room and across a small grassy area to my car in a parking lot, carrying these heavy bags and bins.
TBH, I was a mess. I was already hungry and dehydrated from the long drive and 2 hrs of manual labor was difficult.
After it was done we went to a hotel and had dinner and then drove home the next day.

If you've done this type of move out, did you wait a day after the long drive before doing the actual move out (like go straight to the hotel and go do the dorm move out the following morning?)
Am I just in terrible shape for someone in their late 40's and I should have been able to handle the long drive plus hours of move out lifting with no problem?
I probably should have focused more on drinking water and eating healthy (I stopped once for a fast food lunch) on the drive up, but really I just wanted to get there ASAP. But what else do you do to make sure you are in better condition for work once you arrive at the dorm for move out?

[Anonymous]

How old are you? Are you super out of shape?

I am 40 and could do all that plus go for a run later in the day.

[Anonymous]

Next time pay for in town storage and movers.

[Anonymous]

don't do this. Have your kid store their stuff over the summer. Fly them back and forth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? Are you super out of shape?

I am 40 and could do all that plus go for a run later in the day.

God, listen to yourself. If you have helpful info, provide it. Fitness can be fixed, douchery can’t.

[Anonymous]

I'm early 50's. Have been doing this type of drive for a few years. Have not had a problem. I have done it in on hot days. I agree the jersey construction walls are difficult- especially in heavy rains or icy/snow storms. I do pack lunches so I don't have to stop as much to cut down on the travel time. But it is a 9 hour drive each way. (I have found listening to books on tape helps the pass the time.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Next time pay for in town storage and movers.

I definitely thought about that, and there is a service that comes highly recommended by other parents on the facebook group. But I wanted to make sure I could wash everything really well...I probably should have just let that go.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you have unrealistic expectations of your aging body, combined with poor somatic awareness?

Maybe you should have handed your young strong kid the car keys, told them to carry everything out to the car, and gone to a coffee shop, or laid down on the lawn?

Driving long distances sucks and is stressful and tiring. Especially in the northeast. Forgive yourself but also plan more carefully next time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? Are you super out of shape?

I am 40 and could do all that plus go for a run later in the day.

She literally said LATE 40s. Rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? Are you super out of shape?

I am 40 and could do all that plus go for a run later in the day.

You're 40 and you have a kid old enough to have finished at least one year of college?

[Anonymous]

I could do that but wouldn't want to. I'm 41. We also have always driven a lot.

I'd probably go down one day, move the next day early and come back either that day or first thing the following morning. Take my kid to dinner or breakfast at their favorite spot. See their favorite places. Rest while they hang out with their friends one last time this year.

But it can be done. My in laws absolutely operate on that kind of hardworking schedule all the time (and kind of look down on people who don't).

[Anonymous]

Hi OP, we are all different as we age. A nine hour drive would knock me out, and I would have needed at least two stops, even if one was brief. I would absolutely not have been moving a kid out afterwards.

I agree with above poster that you probably need to pay better attention to your body and plan differently. Why were you so focused on getting up there early? Workout more if you want, but you are middle aged now, you need breaks, you need to take care of yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? Are you super out of shape?

I am 40 and could do all that plus go for a run later in the day.

You're 40 and you have a kid old enough to have finished at least one year of college?

Not PP but yes, people have kids at 21 or 22 all the time. Jessica and Hannah in the offices down the hall from you probably don't, but plenty of people do, and some even go on to be successful and/or use DCUM in their late 30s and early 40s!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? Are you super out of shape?

I am 40 and could do all that plus go for a run later in the day.

How nice for you

[Anonymous]

I'm in my late 40s and in pretty good shape, but a 9 hour car ride would have put me out of commission for at least 24 hours. My back goes out from that much sitting, and the drive itself is just exhausting.

I think the previous suggestions about using dorm movers, renting a storage unit, and flying are excellent, if they are in your budget.