Recreating sense of family after divorce

[Anonymous]

crossposting for more responses:

What are some strategies, practices, rituals, etc you do to try and recreate a sense of family as a divorced parent? If you experienced this as a child what were some things you parent/s did?

[Anonymous]

We tried to do dinner or an outing as a family once a month when DD was younger. With her schedule it's become harder, but we attend her soccer games together as a family now and try to do a family game afternoon every couple months. My ex and I are on very good terms though and live close to each other (5 min walk). So we also do family vacations every couple of years together, but neither of us date or have re-married, so it remains simple.

[Anonymous]

How old are the kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:crossposting for more responses:

What are some strategies, practices, rituals, etc you do to try and recreate a sense of family as a divorced parent? If you experienced this as a child what were some things you parent/s did?

Are you asking about creating a sense of family with your ex? Because my answer for that is "I don't."

[Anonymous]

OP here. I have a 10 year old. I’m asking how do you create a new sense of family without your ex?

[Anonymous]

People I know have gotten a dog, and had professional pictures of the family ,(mom, kids) taken and hung them up.

Also making a list of our family values and hanging them up.

[Anonymous]

This seems simple, but I rearranged the way we sit around the table at dinner so it didn’t seem like there was a missing person.

Keep doing favorite activities, and explore adding new ones. Try new recipes for dinner on Sundays? Game night? Saturday evening home pedicures? Lean into building connection with your DD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I have a 10 year old. I’m asking how do you create a new sense of family without your ex?

Whew. That’s a much more normal question. The poster up thread about vacationing together it not the model to emulate.

[Anonymous]

Start new traditions, or do old ones that you all enjoy (minus the X).

[Anonymous]

With little kids, they had Christmas on alternate years with each parent. Santa coming twice is not great because they sniff out that he isn’t real. So my ex and I agreed Santa would only come to the house they slept at on the 24th.

So on my “off year” I kitted out an awesome advent calendar that had little cubby doors with clues. Each day, they got a clue and had to crack to code to find their gift that day. A month of joy and gifts, some large, some small. But great fun and festive. It took the sting out of missing them on Christmas for me, made a great tradition for them, and they were seriously the last kids in their class to learn that Santa isn’t real.

[Anonymous]

Adding to the above… those kids are now young adults. Santa hasn’t visited in ages but we still do the advent treasure hunt. And they swear they will do it for their kids. It became “our thing”.