Sleep and ADHD

[Anonymous]

My 9yo with ADHD wakes up 1-2 times a night most every night. He already takes clonidine and melatonin at the maximum dose for his size, so this question is not about medication. When he wakes up, he rarely makes any effort to fall back to sleep on his own, by his own admission. He comes and gets me right away and wants me to lay in bed with him which helps him fall asleep. I think it’s important he learns to fall asleep on his own. He’s got sleep away camp and sleepovers in his future and I want him to be able to put himself to sleep. We’ve talked about strategies for doing this but he seems to think I’m being harsh and unhelpful. I know every kid is different, but based on your experiences and expectations, am I being reasonable to think this is something he should be open to trying to do? Thanks for any insights.

[Anonymous]

I do not think it is unreasonable. Could this be driven by Anxiety? My ADHD child also has Anxiety.

What worked for us was 200mg of magnesium glycinate 1 ht before bed, along with exercise during the day and meditation before bedtime. Can he have a device that he can play a guided meditation when he wakes up in the middle of the night (tip:old iPhone guided access locked on headspace)?

[Anonymous]

PP: Headspace is a meditation app.

[Anonymous]

Similar over here. Zarbees calm (mostly magnesium) has helped. Also sometimes do lavender/chamomile massage. Early bedtime a must. The middle of the night wakenings, I forget how we ended having to be there, I think it was a gigantic stuffie, and sort of grew out of it.

[Anonymous]

Not unreasonable. Can you do a version of the sleep lady shuffle? Basically, next time he needs you, you sit in n his bed but not lay down. Then sit on the end. Then sit on the floor. Etc - so he isn’t going from “spooned by mom” to “alone in a room” directly.

My ADHD kid also finds meditation apps or boring audiobooks helpful - his kinds needs to focus on something other than “go to sleep now why aren’t you sleeping!!?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not unreasonable. Can you do a version of the sleep lady shuffle? Basically, next time he needs you, you sit in n his bed but not lay down. Then sit on the end. Then sit on the floor. Etc - so he isn’t going from “spooned by mom” to “alone in a room” directly.

My ADHD kid also finds meditation apps or boring audiobooks helpful - his BRAIN needs to focus on something other than “go to sleep now why aren’t you sleeping!!?”

Fixed typo

[Anonymous]

Consider laying with your kid, this time doesn't last forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consider laying with your kid, this time doesn't last forever.

It's so true. Sigh. But equally true is that parenting includes teaching sleep hygiene.

It's not a solution for every day, but epsom salt baths have worked for us. We put in half the listed dose for our tall 10 year old DD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consider laying with your kid, this time doesn't last forever.

Disagree. Not only will the kid learn to fall back asleep on his own, but he might wake up less!!! He may start sleeping through the night if he isnt rousing himself during a light part of his sleep cycle to come and get you. It’s basic sleep theory.

Just because a kid tells you that you’re mean/unfair does NOT mean that you’re mean and unfair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consider laying with your kid, this time doesn't last forever.

Honestly this. My kid had a hard time sleeping like this and had some anxiety in the night around those ages. I got blasted on here and told we needed therapy and all sorts of help. It stopped well before high school, even before middle school. He’s not doing that at 16 now.

[Anonymous]

I would get audio books and a CD player. In time, he can develop habit of putting audio book back on to get to sleep. It trains the brain. I fall asleep to Seinfeld very night, face down to avoid the light.