Disappointed With Big 3 High School Experience Thus Far

[Anonymous]

My kid is finishing up his 3rd year of high school at Sidwell. He enrolled in 9th, and I thought he'd be getting a top-flight education with elite teachers.

In reality, there's a very real expectation that students self teach. Students are certainly not spoon-fed the material, and if my kid is struggling, teachers are likely to tell him to "figure it out." We've noticed this most in Chem 1A, in which there's no formal lecture, and students are somehow supposed to learn all the material themselves. In some classes, my kid was tested on material that wasn't explicitly covered in class.

Moreover, the grading standards are tough and there is minimal feedback. I think high standards are good, but if my kid gets a "B" on an essay he slaved over, and he only gets a few words of feedback, how is he supposed to know how to improve his mistakes?

This culture incentivizes parents to pay for tutors to actually teach their kids material so they can get good grades in the class. My kid got an A in Chemistry, but only because I paid for a tutor to actually teach him everything. Many parents in my circle are doing the same thing.

Big 3 schools specialize in giving their students and families social prestige, not quality teaching.

[Anonymous]

I have a kid there in seventh, and hearing this sucks. Any Sidwell parents weigh in on whether they’ve tried to communicate this to administration? Then again, I know that the administration doesn’t really care what parents think…

[Anonymous]

OP I could also have written this post. It’s exactly what we are experiencing too. Of course there are the naturally brilliant kids where it would never matter where they went to school bc some of them know more than the teachers - I have evidence to prove that! But actually teaching to regular kids who are bright but need to be actually TAUGHT the material, well go search elsewhere. We feel stuck even though I tried to get my DC to apply to other schools. We even considered our local public and wish we had started there but the lack of honors-AP courses and unweighted grades that range to A-/B+ will kill their GPA. Those applying, make sure to look into this more carefully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I could also have written this post. It’s exactly what we are experiencing too. Of course there are the naturally brilliant kids where it would never matter where they went to school bc some of them know more than the teachers - I have evidence to prove that! But actually teaching to regular kids who are bright but need to be actually TAUGHT the material, well go search elsewhere. We feel stuck even though I tried to get my DC to apply to other schools. We even considered our local public and wish we had started there but the lack of honors-AP courses and unweighted grades that range to A-/B+ will kill their GPA. Those applying, make sure to look into this more carefully.

I’m confused your public lacked honors and AP that seems odd. A

[Anonymous]

This has not been my experience at all. Welcome to rigor. Taking honors classes means having to push yourself to do more work. But I also have found teachers unbelievably receptive to meeting with kids who need help understanding the material. I will say that many parents push their kids into the honors classes and then are shocked, shocked! that they are as hard as they are. Sidwell is a hard school. The honors classes in the school are very challenging. One of the amazing things though is also how kids help each other. It’s very supportive that way.

[Anonymous]

There are good and bad teachers everywhere, OP. I’m a private school product, my kids and husband are public school products, and we all experienced excellent and abysmal teaching!

The point is not to expect better teachers in private. No, the students are higher caliber across the board because they’ve been selected at entry, that’s all. Makes teaching easier.

In private you pay to not have a problem kid beat up the Principal and SRO, to reduce the risk of mass shootings, and to engage with a certain socio-economic milieu and have a nice campus.

[Anonymous]

I won’t deny that the teachers will
Mostly meet with you when you ask for help. Some aren’t helpful even when you do meet with them. The issue is that they lack the skills for instruction IN the actual classroom. After covid, teachers realized that they can give instruction in other ways, like videos, khan academy, YouTube, handouts, peer teaching, but stopped actual teaching, old school if you will, after they went back to the classroom. It has definitely not been the same since then. Students shouldn’t have to track down, literally, teachers to ask them to explain something that should have been taught in class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I could also have written this post. It’s exactly what we are experiencing too. Of course there are the naturally brilliant kids where it would never matter where they went to school bc some of them know more than the teachers - I have evidence to prove that! But actually teaching to regular kids who are bright but need to be actually TAUGHT the material, well go search elsewhere. We feel stuck even though I tried to get my DC to apply to other schools. We even considered our local public and wish we had started there but the lack of honors-AP courses and unweighted grades that range to A-/B+ will kill their GPA. Those applying, make sure to look into this more carefully.

I'm OP. I think that my rising 8th grader kid will just go to St. John's or something and well will just supplement with tutoring for added rigor. At least at SJC, they give more guided lessons, feedback, and clear grading standards/expectations.

Maybe it's just me, but I tend to notice that the more prestigious and fancy a school is, the more lackluster the instruction is. So many elite schools expect students to be mini-Einsteins and learn everything themselves with minimal guidance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This has not been my experience at all. Welcome to rigor. Taking honors classes means having to push yourself to do more work. But I also have found teachers unbelievably receptive to meeting with kids who need help understanding the material. I will say that many parents push their kids into the honors classes and then are shocked, shocked! that they are as hard as they are. Sidwell is a hard school. The honors classes in the school are very challenging. One of the amazing things though is also how kids help each other. It’s very supportive that way.

+1. I just came here to add that Sidwell is indeed a hard school. As smart and hardworking as many of the students are, I have never heard a single student describe Sidwell as academically easy. There are certainly easy classes, but you will not graduate from Sidwell without being academically challenged in one or more areas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I could also have written this post. It’s exactly what we are experiencing too. Of course there are the naturally brilliant kids where it would never matter where they went to school bc some of them know more than the teachers - I have evidence to prove that! But actually teaching to regular kids who are bright but need to be actually TAUGHT the material, well go search elsewhere. We feel stuck even though I tried to get my DC to apply to other schools. We even considered our local public and wish we had started there but the lack of honors-AP courses and unweighted grades that range to A-/B+ will kill their GPA. Those applying, make sure to look into this more carefully.

I'm OP. I think that my rising 8th grader kid will just go to St. John's or something and well will just supplement with tutoring for added rigor. At least at SJC, they give more guided lessons, feedback, and clear grading standards/expectations.

Maybe it's just me, but I tend to notice that the more prestigious and fancy a school is, the more lackluster the instruction is. So many elite schools expect students to be mini-Einsteins and learn everything themselves with minimal guidance.

And yet people are shelling out how much per year for the kids to learn the material themselves? Reminds me of Good Will Hunting…could get the same education for $1.98 in late fees at the public library.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is finishing up his 3rd year of high school at Sidwell. He enrolled in 9th, and I thought he'd be getting a top-flight education with elite teachers.

In reality, there's a very real expectation that students self teach. Students are certainly not spoon-fed the material, and if my kid is struggling, teachers are likely to tell him to "figure it out." We've noticed this most in Chem 1A, in which there's no formal lecture, and students are somehow supposed to learn all the material themselves. In some classes, my kid was tested on material that wasn't explicitly covered in class.

Moreover, the grading standards are tough and there is minimal feedback. I think high standards are good, but if my kid gets a "B" on an essay he slaved over, and he only gets a few words of feedback, how is he supposed to know how to improve his mistakes?

This culture incentivizes parents to pay for tutors to actually teach their kids material so they can get good grades in the class. My kid got an A in Chemistry, but only because I paid for a tutor to actually teach him everything. Many parents in my circle are doing the same thing.

Big 3 schools specialize in giving their students and families social prestige, not quality teaching.

Sounds like your kid wasn’t Sidwell material to begin with. Did you prep him quite a bit so that he could get in? How could you expect that the rest of the experience would/should be different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is finishing up his 3rd year of high school at Sidwell. He enrolled in 9th, and I thought he'd be getting a top-flight education with elite teachers.

In reality, there's a very real expectation that students self teach. Students are certainly not spoon-fed the material, and if my kid is struggling, teachers are likely to tell him to "figure it out." We've noticed this most in Chem 1A, in which there's no formal lecture, and students are somehow supposed to learn all the material themselves. In some classes, my kid was tested on material that wasn't explicitly covered in class.

Moreover, the grading standards are tough and there is minimal feedback. I think high standards are good, but if my kid gets a "B" on an essay he slaved over, and he only gets a few words of feedback, how is he supposed to know how to improve his mistakes?

This culture incentivizes parents to pay for tutors to actually teach their kids material so they can get good grades in the class. My kid got an A in Chemistry, but only because I paid for a tutor to actually teach him everything. Many parents in my circle are doing the same thing.

Big 3 schools specialize in giving their students and families social prestige, not quality teaching.

Sounds like your kid wasn’t Sidwell material to begin with. Did you prep him quite a bit so that he could get in? How could you expect that the rest of the experience would/should be different.

I'm OP: This is exceptionally rude to say. My son is doing well academically. He has over a 3.8 GPA. But the level of tutoring he's needed to keep his grades high has been astonishing. He's smart enough to understand the work, but they aren't teaching him very well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is finishing up his 3rd year of high school at Sidwell. He enrolled in 9th, and I thought he'd be getting a top-flight education with elite teachers.

In reality, there's a very real expectation that students self teach. Students are certainly not spoon-fed the material, and if my kid is struggling, teachers are likely to tell him to "figure it out." We've noticed this most in Chem 1A, in which there's no formal lecture, and students are somehow supposed to learn all the material themselves. In some classes, my kid was tested on material that wasn't explicitly covered in class.

Moreover, the grading standards are tough and there is minimal feedback. I think high standards are good, but if my kid gets a "B" on an essay he slaved over, and he only gets a few words of feedback, how is he supposed to know how to improve his mistakes?

This culture incentivizes parents to pay for tutors to actually teach their kids material so they can get good grades in the class. My kid got an A in Chemistry, but only because I paid for a tutor to actually teach him everything. Many parents in my circle are doing the same thing.

Big 3 schools specialize in giving their students and families social prestige, not quality teaching.

Sounds like your kid wasn’t Sidwell material to begin with. Did you prep him quite a bit so that he could get in? How could you expect that the rest of the experience would/should be different.

I'm OP: This is exceptionally rude to say. My son is doing well academically. He has over a 3.8 GPA. But the level of tutoring he's needed to keep his grades high has been astonishing. He's smart enough to understand the work, but they aren't teaching him very well.

All the elite prep schools are moving more to this model. Maybe he can “process” the material but a Sidwell or elite prep schools kid has the drive and determination to solve and critically think. These schools are preparing them to solve life problems with the a suite of resources. Rude or not, this is the truth. Your kid clearly cannot do this without a tutor spoon feeding him. IQ is really only half the equation, drive, determination, and EQ make up the rest. Are you going to follow him to college too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is finishing up his 3rd year of high school at Sidwell. He enrolled in 9th, and I thought he'd be getting a top-flight education with elite teachers.

In reality, there's a very real expectation that students self teach. Students are certainly not spoon-fed the material, and if my kid is struggling, teachers are likely to tell him to "figure it out." We've noticed this most in Chem 1A, in which there's no formal lecture, and students are somehow supposed to learn all the material themselves. In some classes, my kid was tested on material that wasn't explicitly covered in class.

Moreover, the grading standards are tough and there is minimal feedback. I think high standards are good, but if my kid gets a "B" on an essay he slaved over, and he only gets a few words of feedback, how is he supposed to know how to improve his mistakes?

This culture incentivizes parents to pay for tutors to actually teach their kids material so they can get good grades in the class. My kid got an A in Chemistry, but only because I paid for a tutor to actually teach him everything. Many parents in my circle are doing the same thing.

Big 3 schools specialize in giving their students and families social prestige, not quality teaching.

Sounds like your kid wasn’t Sidwell material to begin with. Did you prep him quite a bit so that he could get in? How could you expect that the rest of the experience would/should be different.

Revolting post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is finishing up his 3rd year of high school at Sidwell. He enrolled in 9th, and I thought he'd be getting a top-flight education with elite teachers.

In reality, there's a very real expectation that students self teach. Students are certainly not spoon-fed the material, and if my kid is struggling, teachers are likely to tell him to "figure it out." We've noticed this most in Chem 1A, in which there's no formal lecture, and students are somehow supposed to learn all the material themselves. In some classes, my kid was tested on material that wasn't explicitly covered in class.

Moreover, the grading standards are tough and there is minimal feedback. I think high standards are good, but if my kid gets a "B" on an essay he slaved over, and he only gets a few words of feedback, how is he supposed to know how to improve his mistakes?

This culture incentivizes parents to pay for tutors to actually teach their kids material so they can get good grades in the class. My kid got an A in Chemistry, but only because I paid for a tutor to actually teach him everything. Many parents in my circle are doing the same thing.

Big 3 schools specialize in giving their students and families social prestige, not quality teaching.

Sounds like your kid wasn’t Sidwell material to begin with. Did you prep him quite a bit so that he could get in? How could you expect that the rest of the experience would/should be different.

Hahaha. You say that as if the other parents are NOT prepping their kids to get in.
Thanks for the laugh. Needed that.
DP