Can someone explain to me why so many on here would never remarry?

[Anonymous]

The men in my generation want too much and offer too little in return. Gen X men want women with Boomer values and millennial money. No thanks. Never again.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

No, honey. You stay mad that you are dull and dim witted.
You don’t say no to any apple cart, you are a slave to it. Which is why you feel so needy and desperate to tell us about your appearance. You got nothing else and I don’t believe you are good looking at all. No good looking person tells others that.

Np. This is just pathetic. Way to confirm what that lady is saying about how useless and also unpleasant men are.

You’re pathetic. I’m a woman and can see right through you bitter female dogs.

Is that what your husband told you on his way out this morning? You sound very familiar with misogynistic insults. My condolences.

No, he didn’t because I’m not a beitch like you.

Indeed, you’re a “beitch” like your husband’s mother, which is why he’s been outsourcing sex to escorts for years now. Go get an STD test and stop displacing your rage onto strangers online.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

No, honey. You stay mad that you are dull and dim witted.
You don’t say no to any apple cart, you are a slave to it. Which is why you feel so needy and desperate to tell us about your appearance. You got nothing else and I don’t believe you are good looking at all. No good looking person tells others that.

Np. This is just pathetic. Way to confirm what that lady is saying about how useless and also unpleasant men are.

You’re pathetic. I’m a woman and can see right through you bitter female dogs.

Is that what your husband told you on his way out this morning? You sound very familiar with misogynistic insults. My condolences.

DP. Hey hypocrite. You voiced your misandrist first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

No, honey. You stay mad that you are dull and dim witted.
You don’t say no to any apple cart, you are a slave to it. Which is why you feel so needy and desperate to tell us about your appearance. You got nothing else and I don’t believe you are good looking at all. No good looking person tells others that.

Np. This is just pathetic. Way to confirm what that lady is saying about how useless and also unpleasant men are.

You’re pathetic. I’m a woman and can see right through you bitter female dogs.

Is that what your husband told you on his way out this morning? You sound very familiar with misogynistic insults. My condolences.

No, he didn’t because I’m not a beitch like you.

Indeed, you’re a “beitch” like your husband’s mother, which is why he’s been outsourcing sex to escorts for years now. Go get an STD test and stop displacing your rage onto strangers online.

Desperation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

No, honey. You stay mad that you are dull and dim witted.
You don’t say no to any apple cart, you are a slave to it. Which is why you feel so needy and desperate to tell us about your appearance. You got nothing else and I don’t believe you are good looking at all. No good looking person tells others that.

Np. This is just pathetic. Way to confirm what that lady is saying about how useless and also unpleasant men are.

You’re pathetic. I’m a woman and can see right through you bitter female dogs.

Is that what your husband told you on his way out this morning? You sound very familiar with misogynistic insults. My condolences.

No, he didn’t because I’m not a beitch like you.

Indeed, you’re a “beitch” like your husband’s mother, which is why he’s been outsourcing sex to escorts for years now. Go get an STD test and stop displacing your rage onto strangers online.

Yes, we all believe that because you said so about someone on an anonymous site and has nothing to do with you being mad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

What are you saying no to? You’re stupid and bitter.

For starters, I’m saying no to your yellow teeth, limp d!ck and receding hairline.

My dentist, gynecologist, and hairdresser would all disagree. 😘

Right, and I’m sure you drive to them in your Porsche with your bulging biceps and six pack straining against your crisp, tailored shirt.

Yes, but only after you.

[Anonymous]

Lots about money in here, which is the truth, but I’ll also add - as an adult child of divorce who saw parents remarry, I have no illusions that remarriage with kids on both sides - even adult kids - is ever smooth. Even now, when the adult kids are all in their 40s. Hard pass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What I see is this among friends is this: most independently wealthy women have zero reason to remarry and rarely do. They know they won’t get a caregiver if they remarry a man their own age, and more often than not the man just wants a caregiver. Helping their own children is their highest priority, and that includes preserving their financial assets to help their kids. These women are usually in good shape and attractive, and get a lot of suitors, but at most engage in long-term companionship relationships. They have no need for marriage and will never remarry.

Women who are divorced but left with fewer financial assets are conversely very interested in re-marrying. They need the financial security and are willing to be a caregiver to a wealthier man in exchange for that financial security. This group is often laser-focused on remarrying. DCUM skews wealthy so you don’t see this group as represented here, but they are a large group.

For men, it depends on how much caregiving and support they want and need, across the wealth spectrum. I’ve seen very wealthy men dive almost immediately into second marriages without even pre-nups because they cannot manage daily life without a caregiver wife. Preservation of wealth for their children isn’t as important to this group. For men, wealth is a secondary consideration to the larger question of how much caregiving they need and want, so the men don’t divide as much between independently wealthy and not the way women do. It’s more a question of how much caregiving they want regardless of wealth.

So in short the dividing factors in whether a divorced person is interested in remarrying are generally different between men and women. For women, the main factor is how independently wealthy they are. For men, the main factor is how independently competent they are.

Damn, you nailed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have spent thirty years taking care of everyone's needs except my own. I have zero interest in taking on more.

+100

I’m devoted to my husband and fine if I have to be his caretaker, but I’m not doing that for a new person.

I also want to make sure my child inherits my money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never met a man worth marrying. Married one with some serious mental issues. He never worked, was physically and mentally abusive, and put me into $40k debt. The whole family stays away from work. Not sure why.
I also dated one that threw himself on the bed like a toddler because his daughter misplaced a shirt he wanted to wear for his birthday. This one I need help to diagnose.
Another one did things that hurt him just to hurt others. He wasn't in control of his feelings at the end. Very rigid and stubborn.Made excuses that made no sense. He finally took himself out.
There were many others I never even gave a chance. Those made the cut and you want me to get married?

You have mental issues since you chose to marry someone with serious mental issues who never worked and was abusive.

np Victim blaming..not cool

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

Go wash the dishes.

dp as long as the dishes are hers, why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I see so many posts from people who are considering divorce or divorced and say they have no expectations of remarriage and neither should anyone else considering divorce. Is that because their experience was so terrible that they are skeptical a new experience will be different? Or because marriage for them was always just about kids and pointless if kids aren't involved? Or because they don't want to be on the hook for taking care of a new older person? Or because they dont think anyone worthwhile will want to marry a 40/50/60/70 something man/ woman etc? or other.

I’m a 40 year old woman who will never let any man get a legal hold on me again. I’m slim, good looking, physically active, and financially secure due to my own hard work. Now that I’m divorcing my husband, I finally have peace of mind. The only thing a man can offer me is good sex and drama-free companionship. Sadly, most men can’t meet either of those two extremely basic requirements and the ones who can meet at least one typically can’t meet both. It’s truly pathetic.

I’ve also become very skeptical of men’s motives for getting married. Listen carefully even to how the good men talk about marriage. It’s all about what they want to extract, what they want to get for themselves. They have a very detailed list of what they’re looking for in a woman, but ask them what they’re offering and the responses get very vague and confused, as if they haven’t thought about it…which they haven’t.

Men give no thought to what they need to give and have no desire to give anything more than what they feel they absolutely must. The joy of giving is an oxymoron to them. It makes men a headache to women like me. The only women I know who want to remarry are those who need the financial help.

No, you’re just superficial with your telling us that you’re thin, physically active, good looking, blah, blah, blah. You’re boring as f.

Stay mad, honey. I work hard at being my best, which includes looking my best, and I’m proud of it. I know it bothers you. Society relies on exploiting women and secure women who know how to say “no” upset the apple cart.

Go wash the dishes.

dp as long as the dishes are hers, why not?

Then she can clean my toilets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never met a man worth marrying. Married one with some serious mental issues. He never worked, was physically and mentally abusive, and put me into $40k debt. The whole family stays away from work. Not sure why.
I also dated one that threw himself on the bed like a toddler because his daughter misplaced a shirt he wanted to wear for his birthday. This one I need help to diagnose.
Another one did things that hurt him just to hurt others. He wasn't in control of his feelings at the end. Very rigid and stubborn.Made excuses that made no sense. He finally took himself out.
There were many others I never even gave a chance. Those made the cut and you want me to get married?

You have mental issues since you chose to marry someone with serious mental issues who never worked and was abusive.

np Victim blaming..not cool

Enabler…not cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The men in my generation want too much and offer too little in return. Gen X men want women with Boomer values and millennial money. No thanks. Never again.

This is a great way of explaining it. The level of entitlement and greed from men who offer nothing beyond the bare minimum is truly disgusting. And what’s up with middle aged men overrating their looks?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The men in my generation want too much and offer too little in return. Gen X men want women with Boomer values and millennial money. No thanks. Never again.

This is a great way of explaining it. The level of entitlement and greed from men who offer nothing beyond the bare minimum is truly disgusting. And what’s up with middle aged men overrating their looks?

I have a friend going through this right now. She is attractive, earns high six figures, owns her own house, and has good kids who are high-achievers. As soon as word got out that she was getting divorced, she started getting DMs and texts from men in her larger social circle. What was insane was just how little self-awareness these men had. Like the unemployed dad who is balding with a pot belly, who didn’t even want 50% custody of his kids. In what world would a man like that be remotely interesting to my friend? Yet he seems to think my friend is tripping over herself to date him. It’s delusional behavior.