Child with anxiety-impact of changing schools for HS

Anonymous
We are trying to decide if we keep our rising 9 th grader at current school or move schools. Here is their profile and would appreciate any guidance.

Struggles with being in a bigger class size
Not the most social, speech needs and is challenged at moments with holding a conversation due to language disorder
Athletic
been at current school for 3 years and recently was elected as class VP!
Anxiety around testing, major separation disorder and lacks confidence
Not many friends but seems to be my child's choice as not interested in hanging out with anyone outside of school

Option 1: stay in small private school that will continue through high school. New kids will come in. Opportunity to play all the sports.
Option 2: move to bigger catholic school and likely could play potentially one sport
Anonymous
What's the advantage of switching? Even anxious kids can adjust, but there has to be a good reason, and I don't see that from what you've listed.
Anonymous
What does your child want?
Anonymous
With a smaller school, your DC does get more individual attention. Butttt they may be missing out on lots of "HS-related" things that a bigger school can offer e.g., sports, clubs, prom, dances, more diversity, etc. Plus theymay have more $$ to do different things like field trips. My DD has been in a small private for 4 years and can't wait to get to a bigger school. She too has a bit of anxiety going to a bigger HS, but she's just tired of seeing all the same people over and over (e.g., drama)and wants a "HS experience". I think the movie HS musical put ideas in her head. HAHA.

I think you should trust your gut and see what your DC would want.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:What does your child want?

Child unable to make decisions. Part of his neuro and challenges right now. Despite making pros and cons list, still can’t do it. It’s so frustrating for us as at 8th grade, we feel child should be capable of having an opinion but won’t give and asked us to decide.
Anonymous
Will the larger Catholic school be able to meet their needs? Seems like if there is social anxiety and challenges with bigger class size, the small school would be a better fit. Could you supplement with outside sports opportunities/social opportunities?
Anonymous
Don't do it. I see no upside to the larger school and your child doesn't seem to have an opinion. The damage you could do with transferring at this vulnerable age is really huge. I know.
Anonymous
I would keep your child where they are. I had a kid with anxiety for whom a school change has been amazing, BUT she strongly advocated for it because she wasn’t happy or academically challenged at her old school. If things are going well in the current school, which it sounds like they are, I would not rock the boat.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I would keep your child where they are. I had a kid with anxiety for whom a school change has been amazing, BUT she strongly advocated for it because she wasn’t happy or academically challenged at her old school. If things are going well in the current school, which it sounds like they are, I would not rock the boat.


child has no opinion-says its fine to stay or leave and asked us to decide. It's impossible, why can't my child just say?
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