Making the decision to pursue surrogacy

[Anonymous]

I had a realization last night as I'm preparing for attempting my 7th pregnancy in 3 years that I should seriously consider surrogacy.

Some background: last pregnancy I almost lost my uterus or life.

I've pursued expensive treatments to "fix" the issues and the process may improve my odds of carrying to term it's also very likely that I'll have GD, high risk of Pre-E and high risk of losing the pregnancy at any point.

I have extreme guilt over considering this path but the more I think about it the more it makes sense. If you or someone you know pursued this, how did you make the decision?

[Anonymous]

Please let this be a troll. No one needs 7 children, particularly not if you’re going to rent some poor woman’s womb to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please let this be a troll. No one needs 7 children, particularly not if you’re going to rent some poor woman’s womb to do so.

I don't have 7 children - that's how many pregnancies I've lost (6)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a realization last night as I'm preparing for attempting my 7th pregnancy in 3 years that I should seriously consider surrogacy.

Some background: last pregnancy I almost lost my uterus or life.

I've pursued expensive treatments to "fix" the issues and the process may improve my odds of carrying to term it's also very likely that I'll have GD, high risk of Pre-E and high risk of losing the pregnancy at any point.

I have extreme guilt over considering this path but the more I think about it the more it makes sense. If you or someone you know pursued this, how did you make the decision?

Do it. Find a reputable agency and do it. Ignore other people and don't invite their feedback.

[Anonymous]

I view surrogacy as any other uncomfortable and dangerous job. Nobody is losing sleep over the men working on oil rigs. As long as the surrogate is fairly compensated, covered with life insurance, long term disability insurance and health insurance, to me it is just a dangerous job. It is weird that because it involves a woman's body everybody gets their panties in a bunch over it. I bet PhD dissertations have been written on this topic.

I considered being a surrogate before my uterus was destroyed in a botched C section.

I agree with PP to not mention it to people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I view surrogacy as any other uncomfortable and dangerous job. Nobody is losing sleep over the men working on oil rigs. As long as the surrogate is fairly compensated, covered with life insurance, long term disability insurance and health insurance, to me it is just a dangerous job. It is weird that because it involves a woman's body everybody gets their panties in a bunch over it. I bet PhD dissertations have been written on this topic.

I considered being a surrogate before my uterus was destroyed in a botched C section.

I agree with PP to not mention it to people.

What I view about surrogacy is not that I'm transferring risk to someone else but that someone younger, without my genetic condition would most likely have very few of the issues I'm having even though, yes, overall this "job" is more risky than sitting in front of a computer.

[Anonymous]

If you think you want to do it you should consider your timing very carefully and review the GOP Project 2025 plans- if elected they are most definitely coming for surrogacy and fertility treatment. The document is something like 900 pages but you can Google to get to the relevant parts. This is not a vague legislative agenda but plans to implement sweeping policy through executive action on Day 1.

I’m sharing this information not to debate Project 2025 (and I won’t respond to anything about it) but to make you aware that if you have a pregnant surrogate as of January 20, 2025, you may be in a complicated legal landscape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you think you want to do it you should consider your timing very carefully and review the GOP Project 2025 plans- if elected they are most definitely coming for surrogacy and fertility treatment. The document is something like 900 pages but you can Google to get to the relevant parts. This is not a vague legislative agenda but plans to implement sweeping policy through executive action on Day 1.

I’m sharing this information not to debate Project 2025 (and I won’t respond to anything about it) but to make you aware that if you have a pregnant surrogate as of January 20, 2025, you may be in a complicated legal landscape.

Thanks for the information

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I view surrogacy as any other uncomfortable and dangerous job. Nobody is losing sleep over the men working on oil rigs. As long as the surrogate is fairly compensated, covered with life insurance, long term disability insurance and health insurance, to me it is just a dangerous job. It is weird that because it involves a woman's body everybody gets their panties in a bunch over it. I bet PhD dissertations have been written on this topic.

I considered being a surrogate before my uterus was destroyed in a botched C section.

I agree with PP to not mention it to people.

Oil rig jobs don’t impact babies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Babies are not meant to be commoditized.

Understood, babies are also not meant to die by the dozen in my womb.

One is a natural phenomenon, the other is not. Obviously, there was something wrong and it was meant to happen.

There was nothing wrong other than a completely incompetent care team that refused to treat the conditions I had, but that's Women's health in a nutshell. I could scream into the void about how little help doctors are, but it doesn't matter. They refuse to help.

To add to that, the specialist that then saw me and I found on my own, said yeah here is the cause of all of this and they should have been treating it years ago. It wouldn't have lead to the now health crisis I'm in. But the condition is tied to a ton of complications that if 3 years ago someone took seriously wouldn't have been me possibly losing my life to carry a baby.

Your losses sound terrible. I wouldn't get in a back and forth with these folks. I'd find another board to ask questions about surrogacy. For whatever reason that is not an option a lot of peope here choose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Babies are not meant to be commoditized.

Understood, babies are also not meant to die by the dozen in my womb.

One is a natural phenomenon, the other is not. Obviously, there was something wrong and it was meant to happen.

There was nothing wrong other than a completely incompetent care team that refused to treat the conditions I had, but that's Women's health in a nutshell. I could scream into the void about how little help doctors are, but it doesn't matter. They refuse to help.

To add to that, the specialist that then saw me and I found on my own, said yeah here is the cause of all of this and they should have been treating it years ago. It wouldn't have lead to the now health crisis I'm in. But the condition is tied to a ton of complications that if 3 years ago someone took seriously wouldn't have been me possibly losing my life to carry a baby.

Your losses sound terrible. I wouldn't get in a back and forth with these folks. I'd find another board to ask questions about surrogacy. For whatever reason that is not an option a lot of peope here choose.

Thank you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I view surrogacy as any other uncomfortable and dangerous job. Nobody is losing sleep over the men working on oil rigs. As long as the surrogate is fairly compensated, covered with life insurance, long term disability insurance and health insurance, to me it is just a dangerous job. It is weird that because it involves a woman's body everybody gets their panties in a bunch over it. I bet PhD dissertations have been written on this topic.

I considered being a surrogate before my uterus was destroyed in a botched C section.

I agree with PP to not mention it to people.

Oil rig jobs don’t impact babies.

They sure do. They keep my babies warm at night.

Based on what OP is saying a surrogate would result in better health outcomes, anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I view surrogacy as any other uncomfortable and dangerous job. Nobody is losing sleep over the men working on oil rigs. As long as the surrogate is fairly compensated, covered with life insurance, long term disability insurance and health insurance, to me it is just a dangerous job. It is weird that because it involves a woman's body everybody gets their panties in a bunch over it. I bet PhD dissertations have been written on this topic.

I considered being a surrogate before my uterus was destroyed in a botched C section.

I agree with PP to not mention it to people.

Oil rig jobs don’t impact babies.

They sure do. They keep my babies warm at night.

Based on what OP is saying a surrogate would result in better health outcomes, anyway.

That oil rig jobs and your babies being warm is not the context in what pp was talking about. Don’t ignore comprehension.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I view surrogacy as any other uncomfortable and dangerous job. Nobody is losing sleep over the men working on oil rigs. As long as the surrogate is fairly compensated, covered with life insurance, long term disability insurance and health insurance, to me it is just a dangerous job. It is weird that because it involves a woman's body everybody gets their panties in a bunch over it. I bet PhD dissertations have been written on this topic.

I considered being a surrogate before my uterus was destroyed in a botched C section.

I agree with PP to not mention it to people.

Oil rig jobs don’t impact babies.

They sure do. They keep my babies warm at night.

Based on what OP is saying a surrogate would result in better health outcomes, anyway.

That oil rig jobs and your babies being warm is not the context in what pp was talking about. Don’t ignore comprehension.

Well, whatever. Seethe away.

[Anonymous]

If you can afford it and find a surrogate go ahead. Never mind these people. But the law mentioned above might impact you. BTW I had 6 MC before choosing this route. Worked fine for all concerned. Very very happy. GL.