DD dyed her hair pink and I’m not mad but am concerned

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you serious? Who cares?

If my child did this they would be grounded. If anything OP’s response is tame.

Wait help he understand. Grounded why?

Her church friends would disapprove and think she's a bad mom

Close. Her temple friends would disapprove.

+1 LOL. You aren’t pinning this particular overreaction on white people. Not today Satan.

You are nuts. You mean Hindu?

Do you know the process of stripping color from black/dark brown hair and how long it takes before you can have pink?

There is no way OP wouldn't be aware that her Indian kid wasn't having her hair dyed pink not to mention the cost

Also she is way to laid back about it to be an Indian mom who doesn't like pink hair

How sad this thread has turned into yet another hate-fest toward Asian/Indian people. It’s commonplace in College / University part of DCUM, so I guess it’s not surprising the same anti-Indian/Asian bigots are showing up here too.

It’s not just DCUM, it’s the entire democrat party in the U.S.

Nice try fascist Trumper

Better than a bullet in the brain

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you serious? Who cares?

If my child did this they would be grounded. If anything OP’s response is tame.

Wait help he understand. Grounded why?

Her church friends would disapprove and think she's a bad mom

Close. Her temple friends would disapprove.

+1 LOL. You aren’t pinning this particular overreaction on white people. Not today Satan.

You are nuts. You mean Hindu?

Do you know the process of stripping color from black/dark brown hair and how long it takes before you can have pink?

There is no way OP wouldn't be aware that her Indian kid wasn't having her hair dyed pink not to mention the cost

Also she is way to laid back about it to be an Indian mom who doesn't like pink hair

Plenty of black haired people have pink streaks and magenta hair. It's not that hard to do with the right product and extensions. OP never said it was solid bubble gum pink.

"Maybe I wouldn’t if it was just a streak or something but dyeing ALL your hair (which she did) is what I would deem a cry for help."

This is from the OP

It is not streaks and it is hard to do. If you have experience with what we think of as typical Indian hair you would know it as i do from an unfortunate stint in college.

And I'm the previous PP. I am Indian American so I don't get what about my statement made it anti Indian. It's not like the Satan PP i was responding to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We should all be -a little afraid- of what our mothers will think. As teenager, we should be

My parents were like this. It caused a ton of self esteem issues.
Didn’t do that w our kids. Never.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We should all be -a little afraid- of what our mothers will think. As teenager, we should be

What? No! Maybe if it were something significant like using drugs, but coloring hair? No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you believe that dyeing your hair pink is a cry for help?

NP and I disagree it’s a “cry for help” but it’s definitely a “please notice me” statement that contains a message.
And that could be anything from “I wanna have some kind of identity other than the boring-haired brunette I am” to “all the cool kids have dyed hair and I wanna be cool too” to “my family is so conservative and I’m so edgy and this is my first step in the process of rebellion” to “I’m depressed and outcast and this is my way to get you to ask me about how I’m doing or for me to fit in with other outcasts”
And however OP reads it, the solution isn’t grounding or punishment. It’s communication! Get curious, OP, and ask your teen to tell you about it. Express genuine interest in learning more about why she made the choice and what led up to it. Just say “I wasn’t expecting you to do that because we hadn’t talked about it. But I’d love to hear more about what led you to want to dye your hair pink….” and see where that leads.
Maybe it’s nothing, maybe it’s something…but ask and you’ll know instead of worry.

[Anonymous]

I would be shocked if my child even at 16 did not give me a hint in advance that his/her hair would dye in at a different color other than brown or nore than a few highlights. Our hair is black, so our kids need to do hair bleach if they want to dye their hair anything other than brown.

Op, have you considered that there is a chance that your daughter is into fashion or cosplay or Japan animation as a reason to dye hair in pink?

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]Some of you have never bought dark towels to minimize Manic Panic cleanup, and it shows.

OP sounds like you've got a 16 year old daughter who has never given you a single thing to worry about. Congratulations on hitting the lottery, and stop looking for trouble to borrow.[/quote

[Anonymous]

Well adjusted people don’t dye their hair non-natural colors. They don’t get nose rings either. People pretending otherwise are silly.

If OP is still reading, I’d be concerned too. Did she do it at home? The other issue is that she is sneaking around and hiding stuff. What else is she hiding, I would want to know. I’d start doing phone checks at night if you aren’t already.

How are her grades? Her friend circle? This is most likely influenced by another person she knows. Is she college-bound?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well adjusted people don’t dye their hair non-natural colors. They don’t get nose rings either. People pretending otherwise are silly.

If OP is still reading, I’d be concerned too. Did she do it at home? The other issue is that she is sneaking around and hiding stuff. What else is she hiding, I would want to know. I’d start doing phone checks at night if you aren’t already.

How are her grades? Her friend circle? This is most likely influenced by another person she knows. Is she college-bound?

This nonsense makes me want to dye my 17 year old’s hair bright pink myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well adjusted people don’t dye their hair non-natural colors. They don’t get nose rings either. People pretending otherwise are silly.

If OP is still reading, I’d be concerned too. Did she do it at home? The other issue is that she is sneaking around and hiding stuff. What else is she hiding, I would want to know. I’d start doing phone checks at night if you aren’t already.

How are her grades? Her friend circle? This is most likely influenced by another person she knows. Is she college-bound?

I was a 16 year old with straight As who dyed my hair purple because it was fun. Literally never smoked, drank, did drugs, etc. I was beyond a good kid. You have to give kids space to express some individuality in a same way.

So, I can tell you that we'll adjusted healthy teenagers do dye their hair funky colors, because I was a healthy well adjusted teen who dyed my hair funky colors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you serious? Who cares?

If my child did this they would be grounded. If anything OP’s response is tame.

Wait help he understand. Grounded why?

Her church friends would disapprove and think she's a bad mom

Close. Her temple friends would disapprove.

+1 LOL. You aren’t pinning this particular overreaction on white people. Not today Satan.

You are nuts. You mean Hindu?

Do you know the process of stripping color from black/dark brown hair and how long it takes before you can have pink?

There is no way OP wouldn't be aware that her Indian kid wasn't having her hair dyed pink not to mention the cost

Also she is way to laid back about it to be an Indian mom who doesn't like pink hair

Plenty of black haired people have pink streaks and magenta hair. It's not that hard to do with the right product and extensions. OP never said it was solid bubble gum pink.

"Maybe I wouldn’t if it was just a streak or something but dyeing ALL your hair (which she did) is what I would deem a cry for help."

This is from the OP

It is not streaks and it is hard to do. If you have experience with what we think of as typical Indian hair you would know it as i do from an unfortunate stint in college.

And I'm the previous PP. I am Indian American so I don't get what about my statement made it anti Indian. It's not like the Satan PP i was responding to.

New person. Yes I agree. And the facts matter.

I also agree with the other parents (including the original parent) that is very concerning. It is not something to simply ignore. I also feel an overall sense across this whole forum there is an increasingly hostile tone toward Indian people (and other Asian people too). You can see this definitely ocuring in the schools and university forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well adjusted people don’t dye their hair non-natural colors. They don’t get nose rings either. People pretending otherwise are silly.

If OP is still reading, I’d be concerned too. Did she do it at home? The other issue is that she is sneaking around and hiding stuff. What else is she hiding, I would want to know. I’d start doing phone checks at night if you aren’t already.

How are her grades? Her friend circle? This is most likely influenced by another person she knows. Is she college-bound?

This nonsense makes me want to dye my 17 year old’s hair bright pink myself.

Have fun. But normal kids don’t do that. Stop gaslighting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well adjusted people don’t dye their hair non-natural colors. They don’t get nose rings either. People pretending otherwise are silly.

If OP is still reading, I’d be concerned too. Did she do it at home? The other issue is that she is sneaking around and hiding stuff. What else is she hiding, I would want to know. I’d start doing phone checks at night if you aren’t already.

How are her grades? Her friend circle? This is most likely influenced by another person she knows. Is she college-bound?

This nonsense makes me want to dye my 17 year old’s hair bright pink myself.

Have fun. But normal kids don’t do that. Stop gaslighting.

I think being crazy hard on your kids and getting hysterical over something as basic as hair colors is going to either alienate your kid badly or result j them doing much more rebellious stuff than a little hair dye.

[Anonymous]

I guess the hair dye isn’t an issue, but such a drastic change so suddenly might signal a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well adjusted people don’t dye their hair non-natural colors. They don’t get nose rings either. People pretending otherwise are silly.

If OP is still reading, I’d be concerned too. Did she do it at home? The other issue is that she is sneaking around and hiding stuff. What else is she hiding, I would want to know. I’d start doing phone checks at night if you aren’t already.

How are her grades? Her friend circle? This is most likely influenced by another person she knows. Is she college-bound?

This nonsense makes me want to dye my 17 year old’s hair bright pink myself.

Have fun. But normal kids don’t do that. Stop gaslighting.

I’m not gaslighting. We just have different ideas of what a “normal kid” is.

It’s really harmful to assume that kids who like hair dye or goth makeup or whatever are obviously mentally ill. Believe me, there are tons of kids with mental health problems blending in to the crowd.