Are those grandparents who are worried about being "too far away" from grandchildren unaware of airplanes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where do you live and where do the grandparents live?

I grew up outside of NYC and my grandparents were in Wisconsin. I saw them all the time—one or two trips out there a year, one or two trips out to see us a year, occasional opportunities to see them somewhere inbetween. It's not hard if you care... they were there when it mattered and I never felt less loved—but I sure think of my moments with them as more special than my wife who grew up with her grandparents three houses away and subsequently knew all the horrible details of her grandmother's alcoholism and her grandfather's remarriage to a gold-digger with a sextoy fetish.

Distance makes the heart grow fond... I'd never live near my grandkids.

I lived a mile away from my furthest grandparent and while sure family can be messy, I have such fond memories of my childhood and being aroound my italian family. We had Sunday dinner every week, celebrated birthdays, attended recitals and games etc, etc. I knew all of my great aunts and uncles and I was super close to all of my cousins. I feel like that lifestyle has slipped away but I'm so grateful to have grown up that way.

the lifestyle still exists, we're all just in therapy over it.

What does your therapist say?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, you can get on a plane and be there for any signficant events your family wants you there for and you won't haunt them when they don't want you...

Grandparents are aging and mine are about to age out of plane travel unfortunately. So, no. You can't always do this

As long as they don't try to be emotionally manipulative, it's fine... but if they're playing the guilt card about it...

Not everyone does, you know.

Okay? but this thread is about people who do...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where do you live and where do the grandparents live?

I grew up outside of NYC and my grandparents were in Wisconsin. I saw them all the time—one or two trips out there a year, one or two trips out to see us a year, occasional opportunities to see them somewhere inbetween. It's not hard if you care... they were there when it mattered and I never felt less loved—but I sure think of my moments with them as more special than my wife who grew up with her grandparents three houses away and subsequently knew all the horrible details of her grandmother's alcoholism and her grandfather's remarriage to a gold-digger with a sextoy fetish.

Distance makes the heart grow fond... I'd never live near my grandkids.

I lived a mile away from my furthest grandparent and while sure family can be messy, I have such fond memories of my childhood and being aroound my italian family. We had Sunday dinner every week, celebrated birthdays, attended recitals and games etc, etc. I knew all of my great aunts and uncles and I was super close to all of my cousins. I feel like that lifestyle has slipped away but I'm so grateful to have grown up that way.

the lifestyle still exists, we're all just in therapy over it.

What does your therapist say?

"Don't let baby boomers guilt you into catering to their selfish ways. They're all snakes."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

Agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

"It's CRAZY to say that manipulative grandparents shouldn't be catered to! You need help! Not me! You! I'm not projecting!"

:lol:

gtfo with that! we're your adult children, not morons

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where do you live and where do the grandparents live?

I grew up outside of NYC and my grandparents were in Wisconsin. I saw them all the time—one or two trips out there a year, one or two trips out to see us a year, occasional opportunities to see them somewhere inbetween. It's not hard if you care... they were there when it mattered and I never felt less loved—but I sure think of my moments with them as more special than my wife who grew up with her grandparents three houses away and subsequently knew all the horrible details of her grandmother's alcoholism and her grandfather's remarriage to a gold-digger with a sextoy fetish.

Distance makes the heart grow fond... I'd never live near my grandkids.

I lived a mile away from my furthest grandparent and while sure family can be messy, I have such fond memories of my childhood and being aroound my italian family. We had Sunday dinner every week, celebrated birthdays, attended recitals and games etc, etc. I knew all of my great aunts and uncles and I was super close to all of my cousins. I feel like that lifestyle has slipped away but I'm so grateful to have grown up that way.

the lifestyle still exists, we're all just in therapy over it.

What does your therapist say?

"Don't let baby boomers guilt you into catering to their selfish ways. They're all snakes."

Sounds like you found a therapist who will tell you what you want to hear. That’s useful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where do you live and where do the grandparents live?

I grew up outside of NYC and my grandparents were in Wisconsin. I saw them all the time—one or two trips out there a year, one or two trips out to see us a year, occasional opportunities to see them somewhere inbetween. It's not hard if you care... they were there when it mattered and I never felt less loved—but I sure think of my moments with them as more special than my wife who grew up with her grandparents three houses away and subsequently knew all the horrible details of her grandmother's alcoholism and her grandfather's remarriage to a gold-digger with a sextoy fetish.

Distance makes the heart grow fond... I'd never live near my grandkids.

I lived a mile away from my furthest grandparent and while sure family can be messy, I have such fond memories of my childhood and being aroound my italian family. We had Sunday dinner every week, celebrated birthdays, attended recitals and games etc, etc. I knew all of my great aunts and uncles and I was super close to all of my cousins. I feel like that lifestyle has slipped away but I'm so grateful to have grown up that way.

the lifestyle still exists, we're all just in therapy over it.

What does your therapist say?

"Don't let baby boomers guilt you into catering to their selfish ways. They're all snakes."

Sounds like you found a therapist who will tell you what you want to hear. That’s useful.

Sounds like you're angry your adult children are trying to live their own lives. Let them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

"It's CRAZY to say that manipulative grandparents shouldn't be catered to! You need help! Not me! You! I'm not projecting!"

:lol:

gtfo with that! we're your adult children, not morons

No, you aren’t the adult child of anyone here. From an outside perspective, you sound unreasonably angry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

"It's CRAZY to say that manipulative grandparents shouldn't be catered to! You need help! Not me! You! I'm not projecting!"

:lol:

gtfo with that! we're your adult children, not morons

It’s not normal to be this crazed about ANYBODY trying to manipulate you.

Get help to learn to not to react so emotionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where do you live and where do the grandparents live?

I grew up outside of NYC and my grandparents were in Wisconsin. I saw them all the time—one or two trips out there a year, one or two trips out to see us a year, occasional opportunities to see them somewhere inbetween. It's not hard if you care... they were there when it mattered and I never felt less loved—but I sure think of my moments with them as more special than my wife who grew up with her grandparents three houses away and subsequently knew all the horrible details of her grandmother's alcoholism and her grandfather's remarriage to a gold-digger with a sextoy fetish.

Distance makes the heart grow fond... I'd never live near my grandkids.

I lived a mile away from my furthest grandparent and while sure family can be messy, I have such fond memories of my childhood and being aroound my italian family. We had Sunday dinner every week, celebrated birthdays, attended recitals and games etc, etc. I knew all of my great aunts and uncles and I was super close to all of my cousins. I feel like that lifestyle has slipped away but I'm so grateful to have grown up that way.

the lifestyle still exists, we're all just in therapy over it.

What does your therapist say?

"Don't let baby boomers guilt you into catering to their selfish ways. They're all snakes."

Sounds like you found a therapist who will tell you what you want to hear. That’s useful.

Sounds like you're angry your adult children are trying to live their own lives. Let them!

So now you can tell which posters have kids? Are you psychic?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

"It's CRAZY to say that manipulative grandparents shouldn't be catered to! You need help! Not me! You! I'm not projecting!"

:lol:

gtfo with that! we're your adult children, not morons

No, you aren’t the adult child of anyone here. From an outside perspective, you sound unreasonably angry.

and you sound like someone who involves themselves in thigns that aren't their busines.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, you can get on a plane and be there for any signficant events your family wants you there for and you won't haunt them when they don't want you...

Nasty selfish post. I would be grateful if my children’s grandparents were alive let alone live near. I would be thrilled for both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

So, move near them? Or vent here, if moving isn't an option for you.

I have a condo near them.

I also flew to LA to help my niece with her new baby and I flew to Seattle to help my nephew during spring break since they had no care for that week.

But I’m privileged. I love the insignificant moments.

as someone whose MIL decided to come "help" with the new baby by inserting herself into the delivery room, complaining about having to take care of the other child, rearranged everything in the house to her own liking and then invited herself back to "help" with my wife's surgery, which entailed berating both of us (including my recovering wife) for not doing enough for her... probably not everyone thinks your "love for insignificant moments" is as charming as you do.

Ask if you're needed, accept the answer.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.
I simply said, would you like me to come out and help with the baby and she said yeah can you come out for two weeks when I go back to work?

So I showed up for two weeks when she went back to work. I cleaned the house I made dinner. I helped at night with the baby. I got up in the morning since 6 am there is 9 o’clock here.

New are bizarrely angry at my post.

if you feel so confident that you're not one of the selfish manipulative overbearing grandparents... why are you here telling us all this? You sound like a real hero—keep up the good work.

Call your therapist and up your meds.

Are you postpartum because you might have PPD?

this is gaslighting, another favorite technique of selfish old people

Actually, no, it’s not gaslighting. Your actions and your reactions are not normal.

I think it’s actually quite kind to say hey look at yourself in the mirror get a therapist and work on yourself because this is not normal. Your reaction is not normal.

"It's CRAZY to say that manipulative grandparents shouldn't be catered to! You need help! Not me! You! I'm not projecting!"

:lol:

gtfo with that! we're your adult children, not morons

No, you aren’t the adult child of anyone here. From an outside perspective, you sound unreasonably angry.

and you sound like someone who involves themselves in thigns that aren't their busines.

It’s the internet, dear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d like to be at insignificant events too.

Then try in court to get their custody as they are OP's kids and you can only get as much time as she sees fit.

God, what a hostile comment. Clicking away somewhere else now.