Why am I so annoyed by all these fully functional adults getting diagnosed with Autism?

[Anonymous]

I get the frustration but you can never know what is actually going on in someone's life.

Also as I've been through the process of diagnosis with my own kid, whose autism is not severe or highly visible to others, I've learned how very individual this stuff is. Like my kid took two full years to potty train and it was a nightmare, but most people don't know about that or if they do, I think they assume we were just bad at potty training. Likewise, social issues get ascribed to other things because it fits a cultural narrative people have brought into. Like my kid used to be almost nonverbal in school and social situations. People viewed this as shyness or lack of confidence. It was actually extreme anxiety due to not being able to read social settings or understand what other people were saying when they used sarcasm, shorthand, or said the opposite of what they meant (which it runs out people do all the time). But to others she was just shy. After therapy and a lot of work, she's no longer "shy" -- she's actually pretty socially confident and will walk up to kids she doesn't know and ask to play or share things about herself easily with classmates. However her confidence reads as arrogance and some kids think it's "weird" because she doesn't understand or engage in the nuances of socializing. She'll walk up to two kids who others would assume wanted to be alone -- leaned in towards each other, whispering quietly -- and confidently introduce herself and suggest a game for the three of them to play together. People don't view this as a sign of autism because she will make eye contact and speak very clearly and smile. But it's because she's literally been trained to do those things, those are learnable skills. Whereas understanding the nuance of the social situation is way harder for her (she's always trying to decode it, she asks us a million questions about this stuff and is constantly trying to figure out how relationships work, why people are friendly to some people and not others, all of it). So people just say "oh that kid is really awkward" or "that girl is full of herself." They don't know.

Watching this unfold makes me realize how many adults have these same issues, including me. I don't know if I have autism and haven't sought out a diagnosis. But watching my kid who is diagnosed and definitely have autism work through this stuff has set off a light bulb for me. And the truth is I have had MAJOR challenges in life that you wouldn't know about from looking at me. It does make me wonder if maybe I am neurodivergent.

So I get it. Even though yes, I often encounter people who announce they have ADHD or ASD despite seemingly never having experienced a single negative consequence of these diagnoses. I have a coworker who was diagnosed with ADHD a few years ago and I think it's a BS diagnosis. But she talks often about being neurodivergent and has even once said something like "oh your NT, you wouldn't get it" because I was trying to schedule a meeting and she kept giving me the runaround on when she was available for it.

So I do see both sides. I see where OP is coming from but also I know from personal experience that neurodivergence is not always obvious and that people have varying abilities to mask and also that masking can be viewed very differently depending on cultural narratives (parenting a girl with ASD has been really fascinating from this perspective -- so much of the dialogue around ASD is geared toward an assumption of what ASD boys are like, and also boys have very different social expectations and experiences as kids so not only does it present differently but ASD girls have very different consequences for being ND).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:who would WANT to be diagnosed with autism?

A LOT of people. Because it’s the excuse then for losing a job, not having a romantic partner, name your standard life challenge.

I was diagnosed with ADHD 15 years ago as an adult. Adderall has helped me do better at work. Would an earlier diagnosis have helped me in life? Maybe. But I don’t use it as an excuse for past failures or current challenges. Everyone has issues, being an adult means dealing with it. But the amount of other adults I’ve met who have ADHD or autism (often self diagnosed) and use it as an opportunity to explain anything negative is shocking.

I have no doubt that some adults have real challenges from these issues. But it’s naive to think people don’t exaggerate it. I don’t tell anyone in real life I have ADHD except my closest friends. Because who cares? I deal with it. I was incredibly shy and introverted through college. I remember being too shy to sell my books back to the college bookstore because I didn’t know how it worked and the process felt overwhelming. So I decided I couldn’t continue in life that way… I got a job in sales where I would get not paid &/or fired if I didn’t perform. It was terrifying at first. Then it became doable. Then I realized I kind of enjoyed the challenge. I am still exhausted by lots of socializing but I still do it because it’s overall been a plus. I rarely see or hear young people who will take this approach now. It’s no, I’m an introvert! No, I have anxiety! Etc, etc.

[Anonymous]

The consecration of AS as a distinct diagnosis was surrounded by controversy from the outset. Contradictions in the syndrome’s definition soon became evident that would ultimately doom AS to extinction in DSM-5. The main problem was the precedence given to a diagnosis of autism. It soon became clear that most patients with significant impairments in social interaction and restriction of interests and activities also fulfill criteria for autistic disorder, thus precluding a diagnosis of AS. The requirement of normal cognitive and linguistic development failed to rescue a diagnosis of AS for the simple reason that cognitive and linguistic delay are not mandatory for diagnosing autistic disorder (Mayes et al., 2001; Happé, 2011). As Miller and Ozonoff (1997) demonstrated, even Asperger’s own initial cases would fail to qualify for a DSM-IV diagnosis of AS. Moreover, it is often difficult to establish retrospectively if a patient had normal language before the age of three, and full-scale IQ is seldom a useful measure in AS, given the typically heterogeneous IQ profile (Gillberg, 2002; Spek et al., 2008). Consequences of this conundrum soon became visible in research. Researchers used AS and HFA as interchangeable diagnoses, modified DSM or ICD criteria, or used original, investigator-specific criteria, compromising comparability across studies (Klin et al., 2005).

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4725185/

[Anonymous]

Totally agree. It makes them feel special. It's in the same vain as people who claim they're "gifted kid burnouts". Like, if you were really gifted you wouldn't burn out!!!!!!!!!! And then they connect with you on linkedin and you see they went to a no name school for undergrad and another no name for their master's in psychology or whatever. People are really strange. You don't need to be a special snowflake!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh god the masking. It doesn't look like autism but everyone just pretends to be normal.

That is in itself normal. It's the human condition. We are all human and quirky. I think a lot of people within the boundaries of what is normal are getting diagnoses for literally normal behavior.

+1

You all sound incredibly ignorant and mean. Guess you never got the message that not all disabilities are visible. Autism isn't about how an autistic person looks to you. It's about their experience. Imagine telling a person with a malignant brain tumor that they don't look like they have cancer. Who would do that?

DP. I don’t it helpful to anyone to pretend that “fully functional” adults—whatever that means—just sail through their days without experiencing the same type of symptoms that can get someone a diagnosis. I mean, everybody masks to some extent.

You are intentionally ignoring the multiple posters that have tried to describe to you the very real, impairing symptoms that people can have despite being able to hold down a job. It sounds like nobody can help you.

And you are ignoring the fact that that’s not the kind of person the OP’s talking about.

PP with the undiagnosed dad -- I think it's hard to know how someone is affected unless you have seen a lot more details about the person's life than you can see from social media or casual interactions. Both my dad and brother "pass" as normal until you look closer and then you see the profound and very negative impact on their lives.

But do you understand that you don’t know what “normal” not on the spectrum folks lives’ look like in private? Because a lot of us also have “quirks”, eat the same foods, find being social tiring etc. I think OP is acknowledging some people lean on an autism diagnosis (sometimes self diagnosed) when another person may have the same “symptoms” and just think this is life and we deal with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

The consecration of AS as a distinct diagnosis was surrounded by controversy from the outset. Contradictions in the syndrome’s definition soon became evident that would ultimately doom AS to extinction in DSM-5. The main problem was the precedence given to a diagnosis of autism. It soon became clear that most patients with significant impairments in social interaction and restriction of interests and activities also fulfill criteria for autistic disorder, thus precluding a diagnosis of AS. The requirement of normal cognitive and linguistic development failed to rescue a diagnosis of AS for the simple reason that cognitive and linguistic delay are not mandatory for diagnosing autistic disorder (Mayes et al., 2001; Happé, 2011). As Miller and Ozonoff (1997) demonstrated, even Asperger’s own initial cases would fail to qualify for a DSM-IV diagnosis of AS. Moreover, it is often difficult to establish retrospectively if a patient had normal language before the age of three, and full-scale IQ is seldom a useful measure in AS, given the typically heterogeneous IQ profile (Gillberg, 2002; Spek et al., 2008). Consequences of this conundrum soon became visible in research. Researchers used AS and HFA as interchangeable diagnoses, modified DSM or ICD criteria, or used original, investigator-specific criteria, compromising comparability across studies (Klin et al., 2005).

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4725185/

Then I guess it's time to just scrap the DSM and diagnoses altogether.

I mean, seriously? Can these guys even hear themselves? SMH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Totally agree. It makes them feel special. It's in the same vain as people who claim they're "gifted kid burnouts". Like, if you were really gifted you wouldn't burn out!!!!!!!!!! And then they connect with you on linkedin and you see they went to a no name school for undergrad and another no name for their master's in psychology or whatever. People are really strange. You don't need to be a special snowflake!!

You really need to get off Tik Tok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

The consecration of AS as a distinct diagnosis was surrounded by controversy from the outset. Contradictions in the syndrome’s definition soon became evident that would ultimately doom AS to extinction in DSM-5. The main problem was the precedence given to a diagnosis of autism. It soon became clear that most patients with significant impairments in social interaction and restriction of interests and activities also fulfill criteria for autistic disorder, thus precluding a diagnosis of AS. The requirement of normal cognitive and linguistic development failed to rescue a diagnosis of AS for the simple reason that cognitive and linguistic delay are not mandatory for diagnosing autistic disorder (Mayes et al., 2001; Happé, 2011). As Miller and Ozonoff (1997) demonstrated, even Asperger’s own initial cases would fail to qualify for a DSM-IV diagnosis of AS. Moreover, it is often difficult to establish retrospectively if a patient had normal language before the age of three, and full-scale IQ is seldom a useful measure in AS, given the typically heterogeneous IQ profile (Gillberg, 2002; Spek et al., 2008). Consequences of this conundrum soon became visible in research. Researchers used AS and HFA as interchangeable diagnoses, modified DSM or ICD criteria, or used original, investigator-specific criteria, compromising comparability across studies (Klin et al., 2005).

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4725185/

Then I guess it's time to just scrap the DSM and diagnoses altogether.

I mean, seriously? Can these guys even hear themselves? SMH

Are you talking to the authors of the above paper?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh god the masking. It doesn't look like autism but everyone just pretends to be normal.

That is in itself normal. It's the human condition. We are all human and quirky. I think a lot of people within the boundaries of what is normal are getting diagnoses for literally normal behavior.

+1

You all sound incredibly ignorant and mean. Guess you never got the message that not all disabilities are visible. Autism isn't about how an autistic person looks to you. It's about their experience. Imagine telling a person with a malignant brain tumor that they don't look like they have cancer. Who would do that?

DP. I don’t it helpful to anyone to pretend that “fully functional” adults—whatever that means—just sail through their days without experiencing the same type of symptoms that can get someone a diagnosis. I mean, everybody masks to some extent.

You are intentionally ignoring the multiple posters that have tried to describe to you the very real, impairing symptoms that people can have despite being able to hold down a job. It sounds like nobody can help you.

And you are ignoring the fact that that’s not the kind of person the OP’s talking about.

PP with the undiagnosed dad -- I think it's hard to know how someone is affected unless you have seen a lot more details about the person's life than you can see from social media or casual interactions. Both my dad and brother "pass" as normal until you look closer and then you see the profound and very negative impact on their lives.

But do you understand that you don’t know what “normal” not on the spectrum folks lives’ look like in private? Because a lot of us also have “quirks”, eat the same foods, find being social tiring etc. I think OP is acknowledging some people lean on an autism diagnosis (sometimes self diagnosed) when another person may have the same “symptoms” and just think this is life and we deal with it.

Yeah, of course some people "just deal with it". I did for 40 years with multiple episodes of severe depression and suicidal ideation, meltdowns at family and in one case my boss. It wasn't awesome, and if it's autism, knowing that and how to manage it is an important aspect of overcoming mental health issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier agreeing with OP, and I feel like the disagreers and agreers are talking about two separate things.

No one is arguing that adults who meet the criteria for an autism diagnosis are just "quirky" or need to just continue masking and being miserable. (I posted erroneously we are all on a spectrum, which i intended as a figure of speech - I was referring to how many people have autistic traits without having autism spectrum disorder and conflate the two). I think we all understand that it would be extra challenging to navigate adult life with autism or to be married to/parented by someone with autism, even if it is mild. Many of us on this board have children with disabilities, and we are particularly attuned to some of those challenges.

What we agreers are saying is that the autism diagnosis has gone from stigmatized to celebrated in certain circles, and certain people are increasingly using the diagnosis to make excuses for their behavior and/or self-aggrandize on social media. They are either erroneously self-diagnosing, or they are looking for doctors who have a very expansive understanding of Type 1 autism. I think a large part is just the change in definitions under the DSM and hope for more clarity in coming years.

What I’m saying is that the second paragraph here isn’t actually a thing. It’s a social media phenomenon that doesn’t exist in real life.