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How do I tell her I don’t want to buy dinner?
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Anonymous
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I feel bad for the kid. He says he would get in trouble if you don’t buy food for his whole family? Either he’s not getting enough to eat and it’s for him, or he has a horrible mother if she really did tell him that. Either scenario is so sad.
Maybe start going somewhere cheaper for dinners with him so he can load up, or have him to your house for dinner? If it’s your house he can’t just order more, maybe you can get to the truth. |
Anonymous
+1 This is a great idea OP. I would be curious if there is a true need for food or if the family is just taking advantage. I grew up lower income and eating out was a rare treat, but we always had enough food at home (and my parents would have either sent me with $ or reciprocated by inviting your kid over to our house the next time). That said, you never know….If the need is real, I’d want to know. It is a lot cheaper to send home leftover homemade food (if you choose) than restaurant food. We are comfortable, but restaurant food is so expensive these days (especially if buying for a whole family). It is also possible the kid is making the story up- no? Maybe he enjoys being the “hero” and bringing food home, or doesn’t share and eats the extra meals himself later. Kids can be weird at times and for all you know, the mom would be mortified to hear what he has been saying. |
Anonymous
| I would say something to the mother. She might be absolutely mortified her son has told you he has to being home food. I would act as though her son had misunderstood— maybe she asked him to bring his dessert home for his little sister!— and see what she said. If she doesn’t say she wants you to keep buying dinner for her family, which she won’t, that should be the end of it. |
Anonymous
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This reads like something from Roseanne or Shameless.
You’re being taken advantage of. A great example of why a lot of wealthy people are hesitant to get too close to those with less means because it could result in exactly these scenarios or worse. |
Anonymous
What? |
Anonymous
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I grew up low income and in a low income area and we and nobody would ever ask for extra meals. It has nothing to do with food insecurity.
This lady is class less and taking advantage of you. |
Anonymous
I don’t think that was OP. It was poster 18:43 , the one saying they would just buy all of the food that the friend requests. |
Anonymous
She very likely is. Now back to the kid… |
Anonymous
I'm on this team. |
Anonymous
| This situation doesn't surprise me. My son had a friend in high school that we let spend the weekend one time. On Sunday night I asked him how he was going to get home or could I give him a ride. He sort of panicked and wanted to stay indefinitely. It turned out he was basically abandoned by his parents and couch surfing. He was eventually taken in by another family. I was shocked by some of the situations my kid's friends were in. In his case his parents were addicts. |
Anonymous
| The posters saying this would not happen have obviously never been around low income people. There are definitely a certain type that will take advantage any way they can. I would say no to the request and speak to the mother, and frame it as the son clearly told a lie because you know she would never ask you to buy food for the whole family. Oh and by the way your son kept back the money you sent him to pay for dinner too… |
Anonymous
Sure. You say no to his request or stop inviting him. |
Anonymous
LOL! So generous with someone else’s money. |
Anonymous
| The fact that you are sitting across the dinner table from a hungry kid and judging them is disgusting. |
Anonymous
+1 sadly and they might not even be really low income … just cheap “takers.” |