Barbie movie 'iconic' monologue is BS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Feel like you are WAAAY overthinking it.

From my perspective as a late 40s gen xer, it’s really simple: it’s a lot easier for a mediocre white man to get ahead or achieve success than for a mediocre or even above average woman.

Doesn’t mean that mediocre or above average women won’t get ahead… Or that every mediocre white man will achieve success… It’s just the odds are stacked against women for a number of reasons. I wouldn’t say America is an anti-woman hell scape, but I do think the playing field is not level, and day after day a year after year, it can get to you.

Genuinely curious to hear your thoughts as to what, specifically, is not level about the playing field in 2023z

Equal pay for equal work.

Who is not being paid equally for equal work? What jobs/industries? Please be specific.

All of them. You can google it.

2 people in the exact same job, doing the exact same thing, with the exact same experience will be paid differently, depending on their gender.

The NCAA did a study to see if they gave girls softball the same about a marketing as they did one of the men’s sports would it have equal viewership and equal ad money. When they put the same amount of marketing into softball, it became a big moneymaker.

That’s just one small minor very simple example.

I don’t understand your example. They put the same amount of money into marketing women’s softball as men’s softball (so let’s be generous and say baseball) and then the women’s softball team brought in as much money as men’s baseball team?

NCAA do not televise women’s softball until 30 years ago because “they didn’t make money”. They were sued under Titke IX. They decided they would do a test and women softball was the test.

Now women’s softball makes more money than any other men’s sports except football, basketball, and baseball. They’ve only been televising it for about a decade, and this year they had more of your viewership than men’s baseball.

It’s simply proved that women’s sports can make money if treated seriously. The reason it wasn’t making money is because it wasn’t advertised not because people weren’t interested.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

I mean, most people can't do it all, in that there are only so many hours in the day. So if you have two spouses with high-powered careers, and tons of travel, and you also want three kids and want home cooked meals and to personally shuttle those kids to their activities - yeah, very few people can make that work.

Now, if you adjust your expectations - one spouse steps back, or they take turns, or you outsource, or you have one kid instead of three - more doable. I prefer the saying that you can't do it all at the same time. Life ebbs and flows. Which is not always apparent to youngsters of 22 or even 28.

So? So what if you can’t do it all. Do what makes you happy.

The fact that you describe “adjust your expectations “ as not having 2 high power jobs shows you’ve been socialized to do exactly what the Barbie movie points out.

You think a nurse is not a job? Or teacher? Or a government lawyer? Or a psychologist? Or a dentist? None of those are high power.

I don’t think going to school is outsourcing do you? I don’t slaughter my own beef, is that outsourcing.

You’ve got yourself all twisted up, relax.

Do what makes you happy and just stop twisting yourself all up
Over others expectations.

So what if I’m thin and workout, own my own business, have a H that is <fillin blank successfully job>, and we raise our kids and coach their teams and cook at home and are home every night and do it well.

Who care why does that bother you so much.

Lady you are super defensive. You clearly aren’t doing it all. No one does it all. Did you know some people DO slaughter their own beef? Grow their own food? Homeschool their kids?

You’re doing exactly what it is you want to be doing, which is great, but don’t kid yourself that you’re doing it all. There is a lot more you could be doing and many other people do.

I am also guessing, based on the quality of your writing, that your “business” is some sort of MLM.

No I am an engineer and my business is not an MLM not that there’s anything wrong with MLM’s and once again, you are doing exactly what the Barbie movie says you do, which is tell women that they aren’t good enough, even when they are killing it.

You are the crazy one if you think you’re not “doing it all” if you don’t slaughter your own food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Feel like you are WAAAY overthinking it.

From my perspective as a late 40s gen xer, it’s really simple: it’s a lot easier for a mediocre white man to get ahead or achieve success than for a mediocre or even above average woman.

Doesn’t mean that mediocre or above average women won’t get ahead… Or that every mediocre white man will achieve success… It’s just the odds are stacked against women for a number of reasons. I wouldn’t say America is an anti-woman hell scape, but I do think the playing field is not level, and day after day a year after year, it can get to you.

Genuinely curious to hear your thoughts as to what, specifically, is not level about the playing field in 2023z

Equal pay for equal work.

Who is not being paid equally for equal work? What jobs/industries? Please be specific.

All of them. You can google it.

2 people in the exact same job, doing the exact same thing, with the exact same experience will be paid differently, depending on their gender.

The NCAA did a study to see if they gave girls softball the same about a marketing as they did one of the men’s sports would it have equal viewership and equal ad money. When they put the same amount of marketing into softball, it became a big moneymaker.

That’s just one small minor very simple example.

And yet they've tried to market the WNBA for years and years and keep trying to jam it down our throats on ESPN and TV, yet all it does is lose money. The WNBA only exists because they can leech off the NBA.

The WNBA has only been televised since 1997. In recent years, it is doubled its revenue every three years which is better than any other investment you can make now.

Women’s tennis makes more money than men’s tennis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Female."

Hmmm.

DP. So now there's something suspicious about referring to oneself as a "female"? Wow. Nuttier and nuttier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

Perfect example of someone who has bought into the "you CAN do it all, no matter what suffers along the way!" mentality ^^.
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought it was on point, OP.

Audiences may not have realized it, but the movie's entire goal is to show that Barbieland's matriarchy is just as stifling as the real world's patriarchy. That we have not yet found any way of living as equals, and may never do so. That some minority populations (Allan, weird Barbie, etc) will never find their place.

The conclusion is quite dark, actually, but because it's all wrapped in pink and smiles, a lot of people missed it.

I found this so obvious and the fact so many missed the point just shows how ignorant most are.

Your take is very condescending and very dismissive...You are not the main character and we are not all stupid because we have different takes on this an other things

Get over yourself. You are not as clever as you think.

+ a million. I wasn't going to bother responding to the smug and sanctimonious PP, but I'm glad you did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

So in other words—you CAN do it all…you just need the recognition of being a martyr for it, righ?
That’s what the monologue is. It’s double-speak. “Don’t you dare tell me I can’t do it all”—that’s BS…
“But now I will complain about how miserable it makes me to do so and how terrible “the world” is to me for putting these “impossible expectations” on me.”

Tiresome.

BINGO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

I mean, most people can't do it all, in that there are only so many hours in the day. So if you have two spouses with high-powered careers, and tons of travel, and you also want three kids and want home cooked meals and to personally shuttle those kids to their activities - yeah, very few people can make that work.

Now, if you adjust your expectations - one spouse steps back, or they take turns, or you outsource, or you have one kid instead of three - more doable. I prefer the saying that you can't do it all at the same time. Life ebbs and flows. Which is not always apparent to youngsters of 22 or even 28.

Well said. I was taught this by my parents and hope to impart this wisdom to my own kids.
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

I mean, most people can't do it all, in that there are only so many hours in the day. So if you have two spouses with high-powered careers, and tons of travel, and you also want three kids and want home cooked meals and to personally shuttle those kids to their activities - yeah, very few people can make that work.

Now, if you adjust your expectations - one spouse steps back, or they take turns, or you outsource, or you have one kid instead of three - more doable. I prefer the saying that you can't do it all at the same time. Life ebbs and flows. Which is not always apparent to youngsters of 22 or even 28.

So? So what if you can’t do it all. Do what makes you happy.

The fact that you describe “adjust your expectations “ as not having 2 high power jobs shows you’ve been socialized to do exactly what the Barbie movie points out.

You think a nurse is not a job? Or teacher? Or a government lawyer? Or a psychologist? Or a dentist? None of those are high power.

I don’t think going to school is outsourcing do you? I don’t slaughter my own beef, is that outsourcing.

You’ve got yourself all twisted up, relax.

Do what makes you happy and just stop twisting yourself all up
Over others expectations.

So what if I’m thin and workout, own my own business, have a H that is <fillin blank successfully job>, and we raise our kids and coach their teams and cook at home and are home every night and do it well.

Who care why does that bother you so much.

OMG. Talk about "twisted up." I actually laughed out loud at your determination to make it known that you *hAvE iT aLl!!"
DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

I mean, most people can't do it all, in that there are only so many hours in the day. So if you have two spouses with high-powered careers, and tons of travel, and you also want three kids and want home cooked meals and to personally shuttle those kids to their activities - yeah, very few people can make that work.

Now, if you adjust your expectations - one spouse steps back, or they take turns, or you outsource, or you have one kid instead of three - more doable. I prefer the saying that you can't do it all at the same time. Life ebbs and flows. Which is not always apparent to youngsters of 22 or even 28.

So? So what if you can’t do it all. Do what makes you happy.

The fact that you describe “adjust your expectations “ as not having 2 high power jobs shows you’ve been socialized to do exactly what the Barbie movie points out.

You think a nurse is not a job? Or teacher? Or a government lawyer? Or a psychologist? Or a dentist? None of those are high power.

I don’t think going to school is outsourcing do you? I don’t slaughter my own beef, is that outsourcing.

You’ve got yourself all twisted up, relax.

Do what makes you happy and just stop twisting yourself all up
Over others expectations.

So what if I’m thin and workout, own my own business, have a H that is <fillin blank successfully job>, and we raise our kids and coach their teams and cook at home and are home every night and do it well.

Who care why does that bother you so much.

Lady you are super defensive. You clearly aren’t doing it all. No one does it all. Did you know some people DO slaughter their own beef? Grow their own food? Homeschool their kids?

You’re doing exactly what it is you want to be doing, which is great, but don’t kid yourself that you’re doing it all. There is a lot more you could be doing and many other people do.

I am also guessing, based on the quality of your writing, that your “business” is some sort of MLM.

No I am an engineer and my business is not an MLM not that there’s anything wrong with MLM’s and once again, you are doing exactly what the Barbie movie says you do, which is tell women that they aren’t good enough, even when they are killing it.

You are the crazy one if you think you’re not “doing it all” if you don’t slaughter your own food.

Secure people don’t need to hype themselves up on anonymous internet message boards. Mature people don’t need accolades for taking care of themselves and their families as all adults are expected to do.

There absolutely IS something wrong with MLM’s. Finally, repeatedly saying that you are “killing it” makes you sound like an imbecile.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Feel like you are WAAAY overthinking it.

From my perspective as a late 40s gen xer, it’s really simple: it’s a lot easier for a mediocre white man to get ahead or achieve success than for a mediocre or even above average woman.

Doesn’t mean that mediocre or above average women won’t get ahead… Or that every mediocre white man will achieve success… It’s just the odds are stacked against women for a number of reasons. I wouldn’t say America is an anti-woman hell scape, but I do think the playing field is not level, and day after day a year after year, it can get to you.

Genuinely curious to hear your thoughts as to what, specifically, is not level about the playing field in 2023z

Equal pay for equal work.

Who is not being paid equally for equal work? What jobs/industries? Please be specific.

All of them. You can google it.

2 people in the exact same job, doing the exact same thing, with the exact same experience will be paid differently, depending on their gender.

The NCAA did a study to see if they gave girls softball the same about a marketing as they did one of the men’s sports would it have equal viewership and equal ad money. When they put the same amount of marketing into softball, it became a big moneymaker.

That’s just one small minor very simple example.

I don’t understand your example. They put the same amount of money into marketing women’s softball as men’s softball (so let’s be generous and say baseball) and then the women’s softball team brought in as much money as men’s baseball team?

NCAA do not televise women’s softball until 30 years ago because “they didn’t make money”. They were sued under Titke IX. They decided they would do a test and women softball was the test.

Now women’s softball makes more money than any other men’s sports except football, basketball, and baseball. They’ve only been televising it for about a decade, and this year they had more of your viewership than men’s baseball.

It’s simply proved that women’s sports can make money if treated seriously. The reason it wasn’t making money is because it wasn’t advertised not because people weren’t interested.

I am sure this is accurate; however, the question was about women not receiving equal pay for equal work. This is not an example of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

So in other words—you CAN do it all…you just need the recognition of being a martyr for it, righ?
That’s what the monologue is. It’s double-speak. “Don’t you dare tell me I can’t do it all”—that’s BS…
“But now I will complain about how miserable it makes me to do so and how terrible “the world” is to me for putting these “impossible expectations” on me.”

Tiresome.

Yes I can. But I can’t be a football player.

I’m not threatened by the fact someone can be a football player and you should not be threatened that I can “do it all”.

Btw, running a house is not a full time job.

Great! You seem very fulfilled at “doing it all” and extremely satisfied that none of this is an issue for you. That’s wonderful for you.
And I’m not threatened by that.
But I’d think if that were true then this monologue would seem quite silly to you in the first place.

It’s a movie about a plastic doll, of course it’s silly.

But you are misunderstanding the monologue.

I have it all and I’m criticizing. Like you are criticizing my ability to do it all. In your assertion, I must not be doing it all because I work so there is something that you think I’m not doing.

So you are doing exactly what the monologue says.

I was thin and told too thin, then I was a healthy weight and told I needed to lose weight, then I worked and criticized for not “always being home” even if my kid was literally sleeping or in school, and on and on

But I never said you SHOULD (or even COULD) do all those things. YOU did.
You are creating the dichotomy in your own mind. And then complaining about how it’s impossible to have it both ways. (Except something you are still claiming that YOU do it all. Except. You don’t.)

For example, you can’t work outside the home AND be the caregiver for your 3-year old. So you EITHER don’t work during that time OR you outsource the caregiving to someone else.
That isn’t doing it all. Because it’s literally not possible to be two places at once.
Your husband can do it while you go to work. But that’s division of labor, not “doing it all.”


And for some weird reason

You just posted that having a father raise his child is akin to outsourcing… wtf.

DP. Um, no - she didn't say that at all. She correctly called it "division of labor" - when one parent cares for the children while the other goes to work. That's the very opposite of outsourcing. You seem very confused, not to mention triggered.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

Perfect example of someone who has bought into the "you CAN do it all, no matter what suffers along the way!" mentality ^^.
DP

Nope… but I don’t slaughter my own meat so I “don’t do it all” as was pointed out by some crazy lady who thinks she doesn’t “do it all” because she only makes $180K/year

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't like the monologue either especially the beginning..."it's literally impossible to be a woman"

It's not impossible. I am one everyday. So much of it was the helpless, victim role, but women never acknowledge how we feed into it especially things like beauty standards, plastic surgery, etc. Women put that pressure on themselves.

Did you never study even a little feminism? I mean, The Beauty Myth has many flaws but it covered this ground 30 years ago -- and was required reading in my high school in the 90s.

I agree with a PP who thought the movie was pretty dark (though fun!) and the monologue is not really the point of the story. I wouldn't be shocked if it was a late addition.

I think it is a generational thing. As a Boomer, I thought the monologue was directed to Gen X women. My Gen X friends found the monologue to be very moving and touching, while my Boomer friends and I thought, basically, "No sh!t, Sherlock", and "Didn't we figure this out 50 years ago?"

That’s an interesting take.
I’m a GenX-er and I let out an audible laugh at this monologue because to me, it feeds right into what the boomers were told would happen (usually by men who were not pleased with the whole “women in the workplace” thing). “You won’t like it….” “You can’t do it ALL”, “We have division of labor in a household for a reason”, “running a home is a full-time job! You can’t expect to work 8-10 hours a day and come home with energy left over to do all of the following: grocery shop, cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the kids/help with homework, volunteer in the community/school…you’ll hate it!”
But our moms said “no, no—we got this! Watch us!”

But it turns out the nay-sayers weren’t wrong. At all.

As evidenced by the monologue.

I chose to stay at home and pour all my energy into the full-time job there. And I don’t feel that “expectation” that America Ferrera ranted about.
It honestly comes off as someone whining about getting what you signed up for!

I think the “you can’t do it all” is just BS to make people who can’t work and take care of their family and feel better.

So in other words—you CAN do it all…you just need the recognition of being a martyr for it, righ?
That’s what the monologue is. It’s double-speak. “Don’t you dare tell me I can’t do it all”—that’s BS…
“But now I will complain about how miserable it makes me to do so and how terrible “the world” is to me for putting these “impossible expectations” on me.”

Tiresome.

Yes I can. But I can’t be a football player.

I’m not threatened by the fact someone can be a football player and you should not be threatened that I can “do it all”.

Btw, running a house is not a full time job.

Great! You seem very fulfilled at “doing it all” and extremely satisfied that none of this is an issue for you. That’s wonderful for you.
And I’m not threatened by that.
But I’d think if that were true then this monologue would seem quite silly to you in the first place.

It’s a movie about a plastic doll, of course it’s silly.

But you are misunderstanding the monologue.

I have it all and I’m criticizing. Like you are criticizing my ability to do it all. In your assertion, I must not be doing it all because I work so there is something that you think I’m not doing.

So you are doing exactly what the monologue says.

I was thin and told too thin, then I was a healthy weight and told I needed to lose weight, then I worked and criticized for not “always being home” even if my kid was literally sleeping or in school, and on and on

But I never said you SHOULD (or even COULD) do all those things. YOU did.
You are creating the dichotomy in your own mind. And then complaining about how it’s impossible to have it both ways. (Except something you are still claiming that YOU do it all. Except. You don’t.)

For example, you can’t work outside the home AND be the caregiver for your 3-year old. So you EITHER don’t work during that time OR you outsource the caregiving to someone else.
That isn’t doing it all. Because it’s literally not possible to be two places at once.
Your husband can do it while you go to work. But that’s division of labor, not “doing it all.”


And for some weird reason

You just posted that having a father raise his child is akin to outsourcing… wtf.

DP. Um, no - she didn't say that at all. She correctly called it "division of labor" - when one parent cares for the children while the other goes to work. That's the very opposite of outsourcing. You seem very confused, not to mention triggered.

She literally said if a man takes care of his child then his wife is outsourcing aka dividing labor.

But it’s insane to say he if your child is with their father you aren’t doing it all, you are literally ensuring your child’s best interests by making sure they have a solid relationship with their other parent. That is part of it all.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Feel like you are WAAAY overthinking it.

From my perspective as a late 40s gen xer, it’s really simple: it’s a lot easier for a mediocre white man to get ahead or achieve success than for a mediocre or even above average woman.

Doesn’t mean that mediocre or above average women won’t get ahead… Or that every mediocre white man will achieve success… It’s just the odds are stacked against women for a number of reasons. I wouldn’t say America is an anti-woman hell scape, but I do think the playing field is not level, and day after day a year after year, it can get to you.

Genuinely curious to hear your thoughts as to what, specifically, is not level about the playing field in 2023z

Equal pay for equal work.

Who is not being paid equally for equal work? What jobs/industries? Please be specific.

All of them. You can google it.

2 people in the exact same job, doing the exact same thing, with the exact same experience will be paid differently, depending on their gender.

The NCAA did a study to see if they gave girls softball the same about a marketing as they did one of the men’s sports would it have equal viewership and equal ad money. When they put the same amount of marketing into softball, it became a big moneymaker.

That’s just one small minor very simple example.

I don’t understand your example. They put the same amount of money into marketing women’s softball as men’s softball (so let’s be generous and say baseball) and then the women’s softball team brought in as much money as men’s baseball team?

NCAA do not televise women’s softball until 30 years ago because “they didn’t make money”. They were sued under Titke IX. They decided they would do a test and women softball was the test.

Now women’s softball makes more money than any other men’s sports except football, basketball, and baseball. They’ve only been televising it for about a decade, and this year they had more of your viewership than men’s baseball.

It’s simply proved that women’s sports can make money if treated seriously. The reason it wasn’t making money is because it wasn’t advertised not because people weren’t interested.

I am sure this is accurate; however, the question was about women not receiving equal pay for equal work. This is not an example of that.

No, the question was about “a level playing field”

Two examples were given, when one was pay and the other was treating women’s sports equally so that they can earn money.