Move or stay for senior year
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Anonymous
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https://peatc.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/High-School-Senior-Stabilization-Programs-Military.pdf
This details the differences between branches. |
Anonymous
OP here. This is incredible! DH isn't eligible, but...it's still incredible. I'm tucking this away in case I run into other families in this situation. |
Anonymous
Bummer. I wish this could "fix" your problem. Has your dh talked to his chain of command at all? Any possibility to push back the assignment a year? |
Anonymous
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I almost can't believe what I'm reading. All these folks making so many sacrifices for the children teaches them a sh*tty lesson. THEY are running the show and sometimes, that's NOT a good example. Adults need to run the show. Look, if the family finances or parents' careers dictate that the family move, then it has to be considered. All the stress and financial difficulty ages a person and what will that make them into? A nasty, impatient, resentful person. Is THAT good for the kids just to stay in their current school? Think about that... Sometimes, Parents need to put THEMSELVES first for the sake of the peace in the family. Children are resilient - and who REALLY keeps in touch with all their HS friends? Anyway, in this age of social media, my daughter keeps in touch with everyone she's ever met in school so it's different.
I'm in this position now. Daughter is going into senior year and my commute is killing me in terms of time and expense. It's limiting our abilities financially and psychologically, I've been doing this for YEARS and I'm miserable. I get angry easily. I'm not happy with life. If we move, T]the school district is in the same state and is MUCH better than the one she's in now. My commute will be much shorter and we can have extra money to do things. She can drive to see her old school friends or zoom with them every day. I have relatives that moved their children during HS (even in senior year) and guess what? They're better than fine. One has her own business and the other is in college. They have thriving social lives and friends all over the east coast. I think it's all how you frame it. If you make it a drama, the kids will do that too. |
Anonymous
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I would let your DD finish her HS year at her school. We are a retired military family. I'm so sick of the BS "kids are resilient"
Some kids can roll with it, like my DH did. But his sister struggled for years with a similar move. He was starting HS, she was finishing. It was so much easier on him. The military has got to stop moving people around like this. When we were in Leavenworth for a Jan-Dec school, there were kids that had 3 schools in a 2 year period. Sad and unnecessary |
Anonymous
| No, I would never do this to a teenager. |
Anonymous
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Also, I DID speak to my daughter about this, explaining the stress this has caused me financially and psychologically. I'm a single parent so there's no one to pick up the slack here. When framed this way, my daughter said she just wants me to be happy. She would adjust so that I could be less stressed.
There ya go... |
Anonymous
| People. The OP is from October of 2023, the nutjob at 07/03/2024 10:29 is just prattling on now about herself and it has nothing at all to do with the original thread. Let it die. |
Anonymous
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My MIL moved during my BIL’s senior year and it set the stage for the disaster he is now. She has told me it was her biggest regret.
Why can’t you get a different job ? That seems a lot easier than moving? You also could have made this move years ago instead of waiting for the worst possible time. |
Anonymous
| I moved in the middle-end of of junior year. It was fine. But I didn't really make a ton of friends for senior year and missed out on grad parties and sleepovers people were having with kids they knew since kindergarten. |
Anonymous
You realize that you are committing tax fraud. Your child isn’t spending 6 months in the other state if she’s at school in the current state and I imagine neither you nor your husband leave her alone for extended periods of time. |
Anonymous
What did you decide? |
Anonymous
| What did OP* decide? |
Anonymous
Great that your daughter is stable and mature enough to encourage your well being. Sadly A lot of teens are not. And even more unfortunately, a lot of parents don’t care whether they teens are or are not. It’s great that you asked your kid, and at least considered how they would feel - Whether you end up moving or not. we understand some people don’t have a lot of options, but at least treating your 16 or 17 year old like they’re feelings care and matter, and are at least considered (even if ultimately you need to go with something different)Goes along way. |
Anonymous
There are several states you can claim residency in and not pay state income tax while on military orders in another state . |