Uncomfortable truth: non-partiers wind up working for the partiers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was President of my crappy Frat from a second tier school with a 2.6 GPA and took me five years to graduate. Hard to do when you go out partying 5-6 nights a week till 2-4am.

Towards end of career but was making 400k a year from 2006-2019 in peak of career.

I had Harvard and all type of people work for me.

I know you!

[Anonymous]

My K - 12 private school and law school connections served me far more than my college connections.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Zuckerberg and Gates and Bloomberg are real frat boys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Naive students and parents, usually middle class and below, disdain the Greek system and talk about how they don't want to participate. They claim they're more serious students and aren't into that scene.

What these people don't understand is that the Greek social scene actually trains you to operate in the business world. You learn the importance of socializing, sizing people up at a glance, social drinking, and how to present yourself so that you're accepted and click with the executive class. Most importantly, you learn that you need to be extroverted and to cultivate connections to succeed in your career.

The nose to the grindstone "strivers" don't learn these things. They think the real world is like the classroom, when in fact it's much like a fraternity social. They dress the wrong way, say the wrong things, and clumsily offer opinions that might be true but are socially awkward. So they get pigeonholed as drones. They don't get the promotions, and they don't get the hot spouses.

I've advised my kids to scout out the best Greek orgs, and they've turned out great. They're not brilliant intellectuals, but their superstars socially and interpersonally. They know how to size up a crowd and maximize the benefit to themselves, to capitalize on opportunities to engage with people who can help them. They also know how to avoid people who will damage their reputations, and they don't hold one ounce of guilt for being what some would say is "mean". They know you can't please everyone, so connect with the important people and be the one who others try to please.

Vom

[Anonymous]

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Naive students and parents, usually middle class and below, disdain the Greek system and talk about how they don't want to participate. They claim they're more serious students and aren't into that scene.

What these people don't understand is that the Greek social scene actually trains you to operate in the business world. You learn the importance of socializing, sizing people up at a glance, social drinking, and how to present yourself so that you're accepted and click with the executive class. Most importantly, you learn that you need to be extroverted and to cultivate connections to succeed in your career.

The nose to the grindstone "strivers" don't learn these things. They think the real world is like the classroom, when in fact it's much like a fraternity social. They dress the wrong way, say the wrong things, and clumsily offer opinions that might be true but are socially awkward. So they get pigeonholed as drones. They don't get the promotions, and they don't get the hot spouses.

I've advised my kids to scout out the best Greek orgs, and they've turned out great. They're not brilliant intellectuals, but their superstars socially and interpersonally. They know how to size up a crowd and maximize the benefit to themselves, to capitalize on opportunities to engage with people who can help them. They also know how to avoid people who will damage their reputations, and they don't hold one ounce of guilt for being what some would say is "mean". They know you can't please everyone, so connect with the important people and be the one who others try to please.

Define “turned out great”.

OP here. One is a very successful pharma rep and engaged to a surgeon she met on one of her stops. The other is in a management trainee program at a Fortune 100 company. To reply to another poster, I had been referring to strivers in the classroom, the brown-nose types. But yes they are strivers where it counts, in climbing the latter and engaging people.

*snort - 'pharma rep'? Okay.

I was gonna say. Yawn. Not trying to be mean but please OP- I hate to break it to you but being a pharma rep and a management trainee at a company are not impossible or difficult jobs to get! Literally every 5th girl I know is a pharma rep.

Exactly! None of this is impressive. Op acts like these are a prize.

I think it tells you just how dumb her kids her and how low her expectations were when they left for college. She probably realized she did a crappy job raising them and this is grateful to the Greek system for fixing them.

[Anonymous]

Your kids are mean and drink a lot! You have succeeded!

I would rather my kids be poor as hell than be like you and your family. Money isn't the key to happiness and your definition and of success is totally messed up. Enjoy the liver diseases....

[Anonymous]

I thought that when I was about 18, and joined a top Greek org, and quickly found out that people in the top orgs are really mean and cliquish, and dropped.

These days, I pride myself on being that guy that is good-looking, fit, and charismatic, and gets good jobs, yet prides themselves on prioritizing kindness and intellectualism above all else. Thus, I have a lot of friends that maybe don’t look quite as “cool” as me from the outside, yet are far more interesting and make me feel far happier than my old friends from Greek life. This change of priorities has probably benefited my professional life, because I am able to interact with a wide variety of people and am universally respected, so come promotion time my name is always up. A lot of my old Greek life friends have really boring jobs, only the same old clique from high school, and just generally seem insecure and dissatisfied as looks fade and they realize people outside their group don’t value their social clout anymore (even as early as late 20’s).

And as for OP’s last, gross point, I have had no trouble dating attractive women either.

That being said, I still advise a mix of being yourself and attending parties and being a college idiot, because becoming a well rounded and happy adult is all about balance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was President of my crappy Frat from a second tier school with a 2.6 GPA and took me five years to graduate. Hard to do when you go out partying 5-6 nights a week till 2-4am.

Towards end of career but was making 400k a year from 2006-2019 in peak of career.

I had Harvard and all type of people work for me.

What field are you in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Naive students and parents, usually middle class and below, disdain the Greek system and talk about how they don't want to participate. They claim they're more serious students and aren't into that scene.

What these people don't understand is that the Greek social scene actually trains you to operate in the business world. You learn the importance of socializing, sizing people up at a glance, social drinking, and how to present yourself so that you're accepted and click with the executive class. Most importantly, you learn that you need to be extroverted and to cultivate connections to succeed in your career.

The nose to the grindstone "strivers" don't learn these things. They think the real world is like the classroom, when in fact it's much like a fraternity social. They dress the wrong way, say the wrong things, and clumsily offer opinions that might be true but are socially awkward. So they get pigeonholed as drones. They don't get the promotions, and they don't get the hot spouses.

I've advised my kids to scout out the best Greek orgs, and they've turned out great. They're not brilliant intellectuals, but their superstars socially and interpersonally. They know how to size up a crowd and maximize the benefit to themselves, to capitalize on opportunities to engage with people who can help them. They also know how to avoid people who will damage their reputations, and they don't hold one ounce of guilt for being what some would say is "mean". They know you can't please everyone, so connect with the important people and be the one who others try to please.

Define “turned out great”.

OP here. One is a very successful pharma rep and engaged to a surgeon she met on one of her stops. The other is in a management trainee program at a Fortune 100 company. To reply to another poster, I had been referring to strivers in the classroom, the brown-nose types. But yes they are strivers where it counts, in climbing the latter and engaging people.

Pharma rep to wife of a doctor, especially a surgeon, is not as plum as you would like to believe it is.

Training to be a manager isn’t amazing either.

You could have taught your kids to be nice people and they could have still ended up in the same place. Instead you’ve taught them they are more important than they are and life is going to hurt as they realize that.

[Anonymous]

I do think there is some truth to this.

My own SIL has a difficult time in life and her main problem is she can’t get along with other people or navigate a social scene. She’s book smart and a very hard worker but can’t get ahead professionally.

At the end of the day how you make people feel and the ability to get along with and work well with others is critical. The Greek scene does help prepare members for the real world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do think there is some truth to this.

My own SIL has a difficult time in life and her main problem is she can’t get along with other people or navigate a social scene. She’s book smart and a very hard worker but can’t get ahead professionally.

At the end of the day how you make people feel and the ability to get along with and work well with others is critical. The Greek scene does help prepare members for the real world.

My kid get that via interacting with roommates, friends, clubs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought that when I was about 18, and joined a top Greek org, and quickly found out that people in the top orgs are really mean and cliquish, and dropped.

These days, I pride myself on being that guy that is good-looking, fit, and charismatic, and gets good jobs, yet prides themselves on prioritizing kindness and intellectualism above all else. Thus, I have a lot of friends that maybe don’t look quite as “cool” as me from the outside, yet are far more interesting and make me feel far happier than my old friends from Greek life. This change of priorities has probably benefited my professional life, because I am able to interact with a wide variety of people and am universally respected, so come promotion time my name is always up. A lot of my old Greek life friends have really boring jobs, only the same old clique from high school, and just generally seem insecure and dissatisfied as looks fade and they realize people outside their group don’t value their social clout anymore (even as early as late 20’s).

And as for OP’s last, gross point, I have had no trouble dating attractive women either.

That being said, I still advise a mix of being yourself and attending parties and being a college idiot, because becoming a well rounded and happy adult is all about balance.

+1 on that last point!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think there is some truth to this.

My own SIL has a difficult time in life and her main problem is she can’t get along with other people or navigate a social scene. She’s book smart and a very hard worker but can’t get ahead professionally.

At the end of the day how you make people feel and the ability to get along with and work well with others is critical. The Greek scene does help prepare members for the real world.

My kid get that via interacting with roommates, friends, clubs.

Oh lots of group projects.

[Anonymous]

Lol, no y'all are working for the athletes.