Please help me to decide
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Anonymous
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Hello everyone!
I understand it has to be my choice but I would like to hear some perspective. I am 40, will be 41 in May. My stats: no children, 2 failed cycles of IVF, each cycle very low number of mature eggs like 2-4 each cycle, no embryos from both cycles. AMF 7, AMH 1.15, FSH 13. Should I try again? I am going back and forth and can’t decide. Already started prepping for cycle 3 and did some expensive tests, so semi invested in the process, but can’t come to understanding if I am doing the right thing. I am very emotional, cry a lot, because I can’t make my mind. Please help. |
Anonymous
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What is the alternative if you don't do another round of IVF? Being child-free, adoption, donor eggs/embryos? How important is it for you to have a genetic child? How important is it to become a mother? How much money and time are you willing to spend on infertility treatments as a whole?
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Anonymous
Hello. Alternative would be stating child free. I do not want donor or adoption. I thought I wanted to be a mother, at the same time I am tired of treatments and I understand how difficult parenthood is. I also developed some problems with my thyroid after IVF and nobody talked to me about possible health affects of the treatment. I am scared for my health as well. I also developed arrhythmia after IVF, it’s gone now but I had it for a few months after. Money is not really an issue. |
Anonymous
| You need to try mini stim. Are you estrogen priming or using birth control? If money is not an issue you need to call CCRM Denver or a NYC clinic that specializes in AMA (Generation Next, New Hope, or Dr Davis at Cornell) |
Anonymous
| I am guessing you are with a larger practice that is throwing the usual protocols at you and have no ability (or interest) in customizing to your individual needs/results. At 40.5 it’s imperative to go about the process with tweaks in mind. |
Anonymous
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If money is not an issue, I would strongly recommend a consult with Dr Davis at Cornell in NYC. I was a poor responder and did much better on a low-stim protocol with him. I was 38-39 going through IVF (40 now) and these were my cycles:
Round 1 - high stim protocol - ovulated early (which happens with DOR patients) but looked like there were 3-4 follicles Round 2 - high stim protocol - 3 eggs, 1 embryo transferred at day 3, ectopic Round 3 - high stim protocol (Lupron) - no eggs retrieved Round 4 - switched to Cornell - low stim protocol - 5 eggs retrieved, 3 3-day embryos transferred, no pregnancy Round 5 - Cornell again - low stim protocol - 11 eggs retrieved, 8 embryos developed, 3 3-day embryos transferred - currently 33 weeks pregnant. Dr Davis made two changes to my protocol (1) adding estrogen post-transfer, and (2) assisted hatching. IVF is so hard and even the best doctors can’t guarantee a result, but my personal experience with Dr Davis was that his office was extremely well-run, I understood why he was making the decisions he was making, and he helped me to remain optimistic despite my poor response to the stimulation drugs. Very best of luck to you in whatever you decide. |
Anonymous
I had both first time testosterone +bc( developed an arrhythmia from testosterone), second time she switched me to estrogen. Better number of mature eggs from first protocol, but no way in hell I am doing testosterone again. After two failed rounds she suggested to do DE or duostim ( high dose again) with 10% probability rate. I was at Conceptions in Denver, was referred there over CCRM. |
Anonymous
Mini stim has nothing to do w testosterone. Sounds like their answer is to keep blasting you with max doses (duostim just means twice in one cycle). I would be getting second opinions in NYC from the places mentioned above. |
Anonymous
| If you are scared of medical complications, being pregnant with your first at 40 may be difficult for you. That is not a low risk pregnancy. |
Anonymous
If you don't mind sharing, how much of a cost estimate should one expect with Dr Davis at Cornell vis-s-vis, say, Dr Payson at CCRM? Asking because I'm curious about the difference, I'm leaning towards CCRM for ease of distance and also his rep but at this point, I want to be at least somewhat sure (I know that it isn't guaranteed with any doctor and depends on various factors), but we have limited time and money. Thank you in advance! |
Anonymous
Hi the CCRM you want is in Denver. Not the DC office. Also you really really should throw “convenience” out the window if you want this. If you are a poor responding AMA you need to run to clinics/doctors that are not going to waste your time. Dr Davis (cornell) Dr Luk ( Gen Next) Dr Zhang (New Hope) |
Anonymous
| Mature eggs have a harder time culturing to embryo stage. I’d transfer day 2 or 3 embryos in a new cycle. Only thing that worked for me (I was mid-30s). |
Anonymous
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I adopted. Best thing I ever did. She is far better than anything i could have created when my eggs were good!
Good luck with your choice (( hugs )). |
Anonymous
| When I’m making big decisions, I imagine my future self looking back. Would old me regret not having tried again? |
Anonymous
| Finish this cycle and then find peace with being done regardless of the outcome. You tried your best. |