Pls educate me - what does it mean to be BI in middle school?

[Anonymous]

DDs friend just came out and told her he was BI. They are in 6th grade. Can a boy really know that He’s bi at age 12 and what does this mean? I want to help my DD understand what this means but I’m not really sure what to tell her. Help!

[Anonymous]

Bi means that he is attracted both boys and girls. My guess is that he is in fact gay but for now at least he is publicly acknowledging that he is attracted to boys. And yes at 12 he understands what this means. So does your daughter.

It does not mean that he has been physically intimate with a boy yet or a girl for that matter but it is certainly possible. And it definitely means he wants to be physically intimate with a boy.

What exactly do you want to help your dd understand? What do you think she does not understand?

[Anonymous]

I recently heard that all the kids are bi these days (seriously)

[Anonymous]

First step towards coming out as gay.

He may be genuinely bi but given the context it'd be incredibly rare and unlikely to be open about it at such an age and in such a volatile environment as middle school.

[Anonymous]

Bi male here. I never even contemplated same sex attraction until I was in my 20's, and wasn't even sure of it until I sucked my first c*** when in my late 20's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently heard that all the kids are bi these days (seriously)

Teacher here. The girls are. The boys aren’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First step towards coming out as gay.

He may be genuinely bi but given the context it'd be incredibly rare and unlikely to be open about it at such an age and in such a volatile environment as middle school.

I'm in my late 20's and came out as bisexual when I was 13, but only to a few close friends. I remember being in middle school at a new school and noticing how many cute boys there were but also how many pretty girls there were - and I realized I noticed them in the same way. I definitely knew at that age that I liked both men and women, but I stayed fairly closeted until college and didn't even come out to my parents until I was 21 and it became important due to the fact I was actively looking to date women and I didn't want to shock my family. I know several other people, both men and women, that are around my age (mid-late 20's) who knew they were bi at that age - some as young as 9 or 10 - and came out pretty young as well. None of them ended up ever coming out as gay, although some definitely do have a preference for their own gender over others, which is a completely valid thing. @ PP - Bisexual people are still bisexual no matter who they choose to date. You can be 95/5 or 50/50 or 30/70 in terms of gender preference and still be 100 percent bisexual. Not necessarily the first step towards coming out as gay.

As for your daughter, I think that she should treat her friend's identity as valid and be as supportive as she can. Middle school is an awful time, especially if you're queer, and if her friend felt safe enough to come out to her, then she should continue to be a supportive presence in his life no matter who he loves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently heard that all the kids are bi these days (seriously)

They are certainly more open to it than we were in middle school. My daughter's best friend, my other daughter's friend, and one of my daughters have all come out as various "somethings" in the middle school years. Wow.

[Anonymous]

I'm coming out to be bi

[Anonymous]

I knew who I was attracted to by sixth grade.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean can they know? You think only straight crushes can happen...until..when? Good lord, of course a kid can know they have a crush on either or both genders.

[Anonymous]

It doesn't MEAN anything! Saying you are bi means that you are attracted to both male and females.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently heard that all the kids are bi these days (seriously)

It's a spectrum with more centrists than extremists.

[Anonymous]

It means that right now, they think they are attracted to both. It could change and they grow and have more experiences, but the kids who say they are straight or gay or ace could change how they identify as well. If you wouldn't respond to a kid telling you they like girls and have a crush on a girl with a comment about how that could change, then don't do that in this situation here.

[Anonymous]

It’s gonna mean holding hands with boys as well as with girls

It’s middle school, holding hands is as much as they’ll do anyway