What Signifies a Woman as "Pulled-Together"?

[Anonymous]

I'm ALWAYS trying to look pulled-together, more than just a shirt and jeans. But I either feel like I try too hard or not hard enough. And I never feel like I look quite right when I try too hard. Anyone familiar with this.. any advice?

[Anonymous]

"Pulled together" to me means more than t-shirt & jeans & flip flops, but it can be nice shirt/jeans/flats. One handbag. Good hairstyle. Makeup done (appropriately). A couple of pieces of interesting jewelry. And perfume. Classic looks or trendy. But out of style kills it.

And make it flattering to your body shape. While I know skinny jeans are in, I saw a woman my age at the movies this past weekend (I'm in my 40s), wearing mom jeans from LL Bean. She was overweight, and with the large high waist on the jeans, down to the peg legs, with a very faded wash, it was an unflattering look. If she had chosen LL Bean jeans in a mid-rise, dark wash, and boot cut, she would have looked much better.

[Anonymous]

It wouldn't be me these days!

I'll say at a minimum: neat hair; shoes and clothes that fit well and are in good condition. A nice or interesting bag or piece of jewelry is bonus.

[Anonymous]

Well-made clothes with a flattering cut that are weather-, age-, and occasion-appropriate. A flattering haircut, maybe a touch of make-up. Well-made shoes and bag. And that certain "je ne sais quoi," i.e. something special that pulls the look together. It might be an accessory or mix of colors or textures. It's a talent you have to develop. I like to peruse the images on The Sartorialist for ideas.

[Anonymous]

A great hairstyle, clothes that flatter her body (no gaps, pulling, creases, stains, etc.) no matter what her size, a gorgeous handbag, beautiful shoes, nice jewelry/accessories, and her attitude (relaxed, nice smile, confident, positive energy, reaches out to other people). No gum chewing or overpowering perfume or killer nails.

[Anonymous]

PP here. I should also add that I don't think make-up is necessary, but one should be groomed - eyebrows shaped, any excess hairs that are showing removed, feet and toes neat if wearing sandals, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well-made clothes with a flattering cut that are weather-, age-, and occasion-appropriate. A flattering haircut, maybe a touch of make-up. Well-made shoes and bag. And that certain "je ne sais quoi," i.e. something special that pulls the look together. It might be an accessory or mix of colors or textures. It's a talent you have to develop. I like to peruse the images on The Sartorialist for ideas.

Thanks for the link -- cool site. Inspiring! DC is such a bad fashion town. I miss Europe!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here. I should also add that I don't think make-up is necessary, but one should be groomed - eyebrows shaped, any excess hairs that are showing removed, feet and toes neat if wearing sandals, etc.

A PP here as well. I forgot to add grooming, and you are 100% right. This is critical.

For me, in my 40s, I think some makeup is essential. It hides the redness I've developed on my face. A tinted moisturizer works great. For people with good complexions, I think it's optional.

[Anonymous]

No gray roots. My peers and I are in our 40s now.

Something that will immediately torpedo a pulled-together look is 1 1/2 inches of gray roots hovering above otherwise brown/blonde hair.

Either own your gray and choose not to color, OR, stay on top of the roots, ladies! This is right up there with chipped dark nail polish or a moustache IMO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No gray roots. My peers and I are in our 40s now.

Something that will immediately torpedo a pulled-together look is 1 1/2 inches of gray roots hovering above otherwise brown/blonde hair.

Either own your gray and choose not to color, OR, stay on top of the roots, ladies! This is right up there with chipped dark nail polish or a moustache IMO.

You are so right! Nothing worse than seeing an inch of gray roots. My roots get colored every 2 weeks, or I swear, I can't go out in public or to work.

[Anonymous]

A fitted jacket or blazer.
Doesn't need to be formal, but can totally pull a "look" (or lack thereof) together. Enhances your t-shirt and jeans! (or work outfit)
J. Crew often has a casual blazer, and I have a nice one from Anthropologie from a few yrs ago.

[Anonymous]

Pantyhose. Just kidding!

[Anonymous]

No V.P.L, that is so not on!

[Anonymous]

Well, I dress like a slob compared to a lot of women out there I'm sure (I'm a big fan of comfortable shoes - especially sneakers, which dictates most of my non work outfits) but I usually feel pretty pulled together - because I am fit and very active, eat healthy, take good care of my skin, etc.

Otherwise I try to get a decent haircut every three months, keep my eyebrows waxed, and wear some good mascara every time I leave the house.

[Anonymous]

To me, pulled together means you look appropriate for what you are doing and never look frumpy. Nothing is worse than watching women tottering around in heels, even if they DO look fabu.

Pulled together also means effortless.