Fertility Clinics

[Anonymous]

Hi -

Does anyone have fertility clinic/doctor recommendations? My DP and I want to start a family (and are really, really excited!). We are considering IVF (with one of us donating an egg for the other) but also IUI. We want to find a clinic that's experienced with partner/donor situations to help us figure this out (including costs, risks etc.) So far, the clinics I've called are immediately flustered and keep asking me things like how long we've been trying to conceive and which one of us would be the "main patient." Ugh.

Any info or insight would be hugely appreciated.

thanks!!

[Anonymous]

where do you live?

[Anonymous]

We have a great experience so far with Dr. Sacks at Columbia Fertility. We found Shady Grove to be very narrow in their definition of families and uncomfortable dealing with a lesbian couple using a known donor. At one point, when I asked them why our known donor had to have his sperm quarantined for six months, but a husband would not have to do this, the doctor told me "because that relationship is based on love" -implying that a husband/wife relationship carries no risk to infidelity and therefore no risk of disease, but that a known donor was inherently untrustworthy. We understand the risk of disease, had had our donor tested and love him like a brother. I was shocked and we immediately switched clinics.

[Anonymous]

Just so you know, one person donating an egg for another, for IVF is even more expensive than "regular" IVF. Because you're basically doing separate cycles- one partner will stimulate egg production for harvest... the other will need to chemically have her cycle put on hold in order to be able to make her uterus receptive for the transfer.

I wish we could have done it that way, but with "standard" IVF running $20,000 we just didn't have another dime to give.

Best of luck to you.

(oh, and we used GIVF and loved them)

[Anonymous]

we loved shady grove in rockville. we did ivf in 2006 and 2007. they also have a lot of studies and shared risk that can reduce the cost some. our doctor was Dr. Timmerick and she is in the columbia office now

[Anonymous]

Thank you so much for all of the tips. I really appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi -

Does anyone have fertility clinic/doctor recommendations? My DP and I want to start a family (and are really, really excited!). We are considering IVF (with one of us donating an egg for the other) but also IUI. We want to find a clinic that's experienced with partner/donor situations to help us figure this out (including costs, risks etc.) So far, the clinics I've called are immediately flustered and keep asking me things like how long we've been trying to conceive and which one of us would be the "main patient." Ugh.

Any info or insight would be hugely appreciated.

thanks!!

OP. My partner and I are now pregnant after over a year of working with Shady Grove. We started out with IUI and then moved to IVF last fall. Our one regret is that we didn't just do IVF to begin with because we spent so much on IUI and then did the shared risk program. We have now spent almost all our savings and have no idea how we'll ever be able to afford to do this process again for the next child. We had a wonderful nurse at Shady Grove, she ended up getting us all kinds of free meds, which really helped, but we ended up spending close to $40K between IUI and IVF. If you are using donor sperm, your chances of getting pregnant with IUI can be as low as 5% each try, it's 50/50 with IVF. All things to consider when you decide which route to go. Good luck and we hope you have a little one soon.

[Anonymous]

Update: We just came back from an appointment at Shady Grove DC. They told us that they WILL NOT do IVF with one partner donating an egg for the other partner unless it is medically necessary. It's the policy of the practice and they will not even discuss it. When pressed, the Doctor told us that the drugs create risks and they won't put someone through those risks in the absence of medical necessity.

This strikes me as complete bullshit. If I wanted to sell my eggs to a stranger, they'd let me choose to accept the risks. If I wanted to sell my womb and be a surrogate for a stranger, they'd let me choose to accept the risks. But I am not allowed to accept the risks to do it for love instead of money? That's crazy - and likely just a pre-text for discrimination.