How far from your house does your child's friends live?

[Anonymous]

Do you primarily get together with neighbor kids? Do you have any that live half hour away and get together often? We are contemplating a school half hour from our home, I am concerned about DS developing friends and whether we should consider a school closer to our home.

[Anonymous]

About half of my middle-schoolers friends live in our neighborhood; the others are about a 5 minute drive away, in various directions. High-schoolers friends also all live within about a 5 minute drive. They both attend the local public schools, which are close to our home.

[Anonymous]

We live 30 minutes from school and haven't had a problem. We are in private school, most parents are within this range. We focus on school and activities. Each kid has one real close friend that we cultivated a friendship with their parents and we pursue Those. They live half hour from us too.

[Anonymous]

OP, you are wise to consider this issue. You might want to ask the admissions director of the school where the school seems to draw many or most of its families from. In our case, we do live right near DD's private school, but unfortunately, virtually none of her friends do. All live a good half hour away -- and close to each other. So this means that DD's friends are very busy with playdates with one another after school, but there are no school friends for her to play with. So far she doesn't seem bothered by this because she is busy with neighborhood friends and friends from sports, but I suspect that in a year or two, she will begin to feel left out, esp as her 4 close friends all carpool together to and from school. I am not saying I would not pick this school again for her - I would - but it would have been helpful going in to have recognized that it would take effort to make sure she connected with neighborhood girls(she does Girl Scouts, which has helped) and also to make sure to nurture friendships through sports and camps.

[Anonymous]

Thanks 7:49, I have DD enrolled in a local ballet class and will be signing her up for soccer - I will try and nurture friendships there. Good advice, we have been jumping around trying different sports but now isa good time To pick one to stay with.

[Anonymous]

40 minutes and it has had a definite effect on friendships. I am willing to drive but other parents are not and some have acknowledged that they discourage playdates with my DC because of the distance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks 7:49, I have DD enrolled in a local ballet class and will be signing her up for soccer - I will try and nurture friendships there. Good advice, we have been jumping around trying different sports but now isa good time To pick one to stay with.

My kids are involved in similar activities and are very outgoing, as am i. However, while we enjoy talking at lessons, it has never worked to get together outside of the activities. Virtually all of the friends are from school.

[Anonymous]

Most of my kids' friends live 20-30 minutes away or even farther from our home. We don't do a lot of playdates. But I don't feel like my kids are really missing out. They spend plenty of time in and sometimes after school with their friends (hanging out on the playground), and even if their friends lived closer to us, I'm not sure I would want to take the time for playdates. During the week, they have homework and other activities, and on the weekend, we usually like to do things together.

They do play with a few kids who live on our block (all attending different schools) and with friends they've known since infancy. If this were not the case, I might have a different view on the importance of playdates with school friends.

[Anonymous]

OP, it may depend if you have anything in common with a certain neighborhood. Most neighborhoods with good schools are neighborhoods that are undergoing huge changes and therefor, you may not have much in common with each other as neighbors. Some of the "old" residents are not exactly keen on the changes, for example. Change is inevitable and ideally everyone would get along, but be prepared for some resistance and possible acting out if this is the case. Some people were never given the tools by their parents to handle change; even though it is crucial - and inevitable! I wish you good, decent neighbors without a chip on their shoulder

[Anonymous]

We live 30 minutes from friends, this is my excuse for not doing tjem