Bat Mitzvah Gift Etiquette

[Anonymous]

Hello! I’ve been reading through the past posts on how much to give as a gift and every post has been very helpful in deciding how much we give.
My question is how to present the gift. My daughter will bring a card to the service, but is it better to give cash or a check? We can do either - but which one is preferred?
If cash, better big bills or smaller bills or does it matter? If we give $54, should we do a $50 and four $1s or two $20s, one $10 and four $1s.
I know it probably doesn’t matter, but hoping to get some feedback in case. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

You are overthinking it. My kid got all forms, cash (new bills, old bills, coins!!) and checks. It doesn’t matter.

[Anonymous]

We recently had my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah. It does not matter. And while it’s customary to bring gifts, some of the kids coming alone didn’t; neither I nor my child cared.

[Anonymous]

If the party is not just after the service, I might bring it to the party where there will likely be a gift table and spot for cards.

[Anonymous]

bring the card to the party, not to the service. i always write a check

[Anonymous]

I wrote the check to the child. I had asked the mom beforehand if she had her own bank account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We recently had my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah. It does not matter. And while it’s customary to bring gifts, some of the kids coming alone didn’t; neither I nor my child cared.

This

[Anonymous]

Give a check inside a card inside a sealed envelope at the end of the reception - not in the temple.

[Anonymous]

Gifts are optional. It is not a gift grab but a rite of passage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gifts are optional. It is not a gift grab but a rite of passage.

I would never attend and not give a gift. Tacky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gifts are optional. It is not a gift grab but a rite of passage.

I would never attend and not give a gift. Tacky.

So it is a gift grab.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gifts are optional. It is not a gift grab but a rite of passage.

I would never attend and not give a gift. Tacky.

Are you Jewish?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gifts are optional. It is not a gift grab but a rite of passage.

I would never attend and not give a gift. Tacky.

So it is a gift grab.

Apparently you going to a party is a food and drink and music grab.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gifts are optional. It is not a gift grab but a rite of passage.

I would never attend and not give a gift. Tacky.

So it is a gift grab.

Apparently you going to a party is a food and drink and music grab.

It's not about the party, people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We recently had my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah. It does not matter. And while it’s customary to bring gifts, some of the kids coming alone didn’t; neither I nor my child cared.

💯